18

The issue we have to ask is why is a psak (legal ruling) ever binding in the first place? Why can't you just ask the next person? There are two main possibilities (see Shach YD 242:31): שויה אנפשיה חתיכה דאיסורא The asker accepted upon themselves when they asked the first authority to follow their answer. Let's assume for now this principle works similar ...


18

This is a matter of disagreement among the poskim. Those who say this is an acceptable type of hair covering include Shiltei Giborim (Shabbos 29a in dapei haRif) and P'ri M'gadim (Eshel Avraham OC 75:5). Those who say it is unacceptable, and differentiate between a regular wig and a wig made out of a woman's own hair, include Ateres Z'keinim (OC 75:3), Be'...


17

I am a white male, and I had this happen to me recently, where I met a woman in a business setting who politely told me, "I don't shake hands for religious reasons". I had never heard this before, but it did not faze me in the least. She was polite in every other way that she treated me. No Problem!


17

First things first, You're human. You can't help being attracted to women, Gd made you that way. Only the whens and wheres are your responsibility. Also remember that this area is a very difficult one to conquer, so don't get down on yourself if you fail to climb Everest the first few, or dozen, or hundred times. Getting a warning beforehand helps, so you ...


15

Rav Shmuel Kamenetsky writes on page 129 of Kovetz Halchos that a woman is obligated to drink a rivies of wine on Purim, and that she can fulfil this obligation with grape juice (see footnote 231). In footnote 230, he holds that since women are obligated in all the mitzvos of the day, they are also obligated to drink a little wine, but to drink a lot of ...


15

I always heard of people taking off their glasses. I had pretty good vision until recently, and just last week I was able to try that trick, and it actually (somewhat) worked! So for men who have impaired vision, that can be used to their advantage to some extent - blurry women are not as attractive. This isn't practical for all occupations. If you're a ...


14

Rambam, Laws of Prohibitions on Relations, 21:19 (or #20, depending on your edition): וכן אסור לאדם שיקשה עצמו לדעת, או יביא עצמו לידי הרהור ... ולא יסתכל בבהמה חיה ועוף, בשעה שמזדקקין זכר לנקבה; ומותר למרביעי בהמה להכניס כמכחול בשפופרת, מפני שהן עסקין במלאכתן ולא יבואו לידי הרהור.‏ A man should not bring himself to arousal ... [gives a few ...


14

The source in Halacha is Shulchan Arukh (Even HaEzer 21:1) צריך אדם להתרחק מהנשים מאד מאד...ואסור לשחוק עמה...‏ A man must distance himself from women very, very much...it is forbidden to play with her... among lots of other things men shouldn't be doing with unrelated women. Many of the specific examples brought there and elsewhere in older texts ...


13

Although the real answer to your question would be found in the Double AA's answer, it's worth noting that there was at least one authority who did believe that pisuk raglayim was an issue for men as well, albeit not as big an issue as for women. The Chazon Ish felt that wearing a long jacket was proper for exactly this issue. In fact he would wear an extra ...


13

There is a wide variety out there. I'd recommend Googling some synagogues that you might visit post-pandemic, and often there are photos there of its members. That should give you some sense. If you can arrange a socially-distanced outdoors chat with a woman in a prospective community, that could be incredibly helpful. As Alex commented, there's a wide ...


12

A) Why were they having relations during the daytime? Where do you see that it says anything about daytime? B) Why were they having relations in a way that others could see? The שפתי חכמים answers your question. He says that it's impossible to say that they would have relations where people could see them. Rather, by Yitzchak closing the window ...


11

The Rama writes (EH 21:5) יש אומרים דאין לנהוג אפילו עם אשתו בדברים של חיבה, כגון לעיין ברישיה אם יש לו כינים, בפני אחרים Some say that you shouldn't act with your wife in affectionate matters, such as her checking his head for lice, in front of others. While some have extended this to prohibit any public indication of her Niddah status (such as via ...


10

A related question was recently on The Workplace, and one of the answers there offered a phrasing I like. While dodging the physical interaction (more about that in a moment), you can say "I'm sorry, my religion allows me to shake hands only with my wife" (or husband, for women in this position). Or you could say "touch" instead of "shake hands with" if ...


10

Practice your fake sneeze. If I'm with my wife and a man sticks out their hand to her, I say "I'll take that" and shake their hand (even if I've already shaken their hand).


10

The commandment to avoid negative reactions is on you, not your wife nor her friends. Of course they shouldn't be deliberately provocative, but if, for example, a normal conversation held in one part of your house bothers you in another part because of kol isha, or if the visitor is dressed appropriately and you are still distracted, this is largely a ...


10

The Sefer Avnei Yasfei 2:5:anaf 2 writes that its assur based off different sources he brings in the tshuva. He argues on those who allow it who he also brings in the tshuva. (it is worthwhile going through the whole Siman and all the anafim since he answers many kol isha questions which are commonly asked these days) Rav Wosner in Shevet Halevi 3:181 also ...


10

So, we all have yetzer. As Jews, we believe that yetzer is part of our condition; reference the midrash about the disastrous effects of disabling it temporarily (Yoma 69b). It's all of our job to recognize yetzer and deal with it. That, of course, includes avoiding some situations, channeling some urges, but, at the end of the day, taking responsibility for ...


10

Iggros Moshe Even Haezer 1:69 applies the prohibition of seeing immodestly dressed women/men to seeing inappropriate behavior, with the reasoning that the problem is the thought process it instigates. Based on this logic he applies it to images in films, and even reading about inappropriate activity in books. So if these drawn images conjure up ...


10

Avos DeRabbi Nasan (7:3) defines the problem as bringing home gossip to your wife, how you were treated negatively, how you treated others in response, etc. According to that, the medium of communication - speaking, writing, in person or at a distance - seems irrelevant.


10

The Aruch Hashulchan (75:8) discusses the prohibition of a man hearing a woman singing, which is based on the statement of Shmuel in the Talmud (Berachot 24a)1: קול באשה ערוה שנא' (שיר השירים ב, יד) כי קולך ערב ומראך נאוה A woman’s [singing] voice is considered nakedness, [which he derives from the praise accorded a woman’s voice,] as it is stated: “Sweet ...


10

You may be thinking of this similar passage in Talmud Bavli (BB 91b) with Sefaria trans.: ואמר רבי יוחנן נהירנא כד הוו מטיילין טליא וטלייתא בשוקא כבר שית עשרה וכבר שב עשרה ולא הוו חטאן And Rabbi Yoḥanan said: I remember when a boy and girl, of sixteen and seventeen years of age, would walk together in the market, and they would not sin The Rashbam explains ...


10

R. Moshe Feinstein has a responsum (Igrot Moshe Y.D. 2:77) with the following question from R. Avraham Chaim Levin: הנה במקום שיש אחרים רואין אם יש דיני הרחקות באשתו נדה שמסתפק כתר"ה דאולי יש להתיר משום דאז אין בו רעיון של קירוב וגם שבא מזה לידי בזיון להאשה ויש בזה משום כבוד הבריות Behold, in a place where there are others watching, do the laws of ...


9

H/T Rabbi Torczyner. Binyan Tzion I:75 (Rabbi Yaakov Ettlinger) addresses a rabbi who was asked "may I deliver my sister-in-law's baby?" Halachically, inappropriately touching your sister-in-law is no different than inappropriately touching random married-to-someone-else woman, but there's perhaps a certain "eww" factor that prompted the ...


9

Per Rabbi Avraham Yosef it is permitted 100% to listen to a recording of a woman giving a Shiur. However it is prohibited to sit at a Shiur which is being given by a woman.


9

Chacham Ovadia in Yechavei Daas 4:7 writes that seeing a woman on tv is the same as seeing an actual woman when it comes to hirur (thoughts) and there is an issur of lo tassuru achrei levavchem...however when it comes to reading shema that's a discussion which he talks about whether its mutar or not,but an issur of seeing a picture of a woman who is not ...


9

Please note that the following answer is not a halachik ruling and should not be read as such. It is a theoretical answer that explores the issue, examining the relevant issues. With regard to the Gemara in Shabbat 33a, it seems clear that the context of discouraging sexual discussion is only when it is done in banter and tastelessly. When it is done for ...


9

"What is the best way to explain the concept of tzniut to a very young (say first grade) girl without explaining sexuality?" The same way you would explain the concept to anybody else: without explaining sexuality. To quote the esteemed R' Alex: This would have to begin with Micah 6:8: והצנע לכת עם א-להיך, "be tzanua in walking with your G-d&...


9

Let's examine the converse of the question... Suppose you have to deal with a person that is horribly disfigured from birth, disease or an accident. Do you treat them with any less personal respect because of your revulsion? Are they less of a person? Where does the problem lie? I work in a hospital as a Medical Technologist, in the ER, and OB/GYN. There ...


9

It seems to me that the answer to your question is that a man's spreading his legs is not as suggestive a position as the posture isn't reminiscent of intercourse (where a woman's spreading her legs is more...ergonomic). Indeed the phrase פישוק רגליים "spreading the legs" comes from Ezekiel 16:25 where the context and commentaries are clear that what is ...


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