A Jew is marrying a non-Jew who converted in a Reform synagogue. The Chuppah will be held in a Reform synagogue and the party (dinner/dance) will be in a non-religious venue.

Is there any reason why an Orthodox, Halakhah-observant family member should not come to such a ceremony and/or party? Kashrut will be adhered to.

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    I attempted to make the question more on-topic by making it more generic and less of a request for personal advice. Please correct my correction if it drastically changed your initial intent. – Lee Jan 8 '17 at 15:43
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    Kosher food may not help as accd to the Orthodox Halakhic perspective this is essentially not a Jewish wedding (YD 152) – Double AA Jan 8 '17 at 15:47
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    @msh210 why is this any different than many multi faceted questions on this site which require two or more points to be addressed in the answer? – user6591 Jan 8 '17 at 17:18
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    @user6591 As msh said, they are unrelated other than both happening to have happened to the OP. – Double AA Jan 8 '17 at 17:24
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    @Double I think the question stands as is, as stated in the title. This is one of those details that someone uninformed has chosen to add to the question so it can be properly addressed. It might make it more complicated (or less complicated) but can one attend this wedding? – user6591 Jan 8 '17 at 17:51

There are a number of reasons not to attend such a ceremony (which is invalid to begin with). I am separating out different reasons, each of which is enough to make it wrong to attend. Since I am writing this edit on Purim, I will point out that even if it is kosher, it is like the Jews attending the celebration of Achashveros.

As explained in Orthodox Visits to Other Denomination Sanctuaries Rav Moshe is cited as having stated that one cannot go to a wedding in a Reform Temple (especially if it takes place in the sanctuary as opposed to a social hall). This applies even if this is supposed to be between two Jews. Additionally, if the person officiating is a reform or Conservative rabbi it would probably not be valid either (even if not in a Reform venue as sapecified in the question).

The second part (Reform conversion) can be addressed by pointing out that the convert is not Jewish and this is like going to any other intermarriage of a Jew and a nonJew. An example of this question is Intermarriage Attendance as well as Invited to Engagement of Girl intending to marry out: Attend/Not-attend?.

These point out that even an "engagement party" should not be attended because it appears as if one is accepting such a "marriage". As shown in A People of Destiny

Against this background of destiny and identity many halachic social constraints on Jewish-gentile relations can be understood and, in paramount, the egregiousness of intermarriage stands out. Intermarriage Rachaman litslan destroys Jewish identity and prevents the rendezvous with Jewish destiny. Accordingly, the Rav zt"l was absolutely adamant regarding the ban on attending an intermarriage.


With this same compelling line of reasoning in mind, the Rav was also equally adamant that subsequent to the wedding intermarried "couples" must not be included in family gatherings or invited to family semachos, and the like. Inviting the couple as such eo ipso acknowledges and accepts their illicit marriage. Under no circumstances may this acceptance be forthcoming. Let us not delude ourselves into thinking that we would be simply maintaining relations for purposes of kiruv. To the contrary, we are being m'sa'yai'a yedei ovrei aveira, strengthening the hands of those living in sin and creating a chilul Hashem.

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    In this case though the person believes they are marrying a Jew. They aren't being Poreik Ohl. The regular case of intermarriage is someone who doesn't care about their Judaism which is a big problem. It's not clear anything you wrote applies here. – Double AA Jan 9 '17 at 17:50
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    @DoubleAA Whatever they believe, it is still an intermarriage. However occurring in the Reform Temple is also part if the consideration. – sabbahillel Jan 9 '17 at 17:52
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    I agreed it is an intermarriage. But maybe nothing you wrote applies to it. – Double AA Jan 9 '17 at 18:04
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    @sabbahillel I'm not sure I'm following your comment about 'an Orthodox Rabbi'. If an Orthodox Rabbi performed an intermarriage in the social hall of a Reform synagogue it would be different?! What does that even mean? It doesn't matter who is supervising. It's all prohibited. And Reb Moshe, z"l doesn't make any distinction between Reform & Conservative. He says both these movements are to be viewed the same as non-Jews. – Yaacov Deane Mar 10 '17 at 21:52
  • @yaacovdeane I was trying to indicate that perhaps an Orthodox Rabbi might have an answer about the social hall for some reason. However a reform Rabbi is of course invalid even if both parties were Jewish. I was yr thing to emphasize the point that someone should not attend in any case. – sabbahillel Mar 12 '17 at 2:22

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