What should we do if a ghost reaches out to us first (as opposed to us reaching out to/consulting ghosts)?

Question

Deut. 18:10-11 says:

לא ימצא בך מעביר בנו ובתו באש קסם קסמים מעונן ומנחש ומכשף וחבר חבר ושאל אוב וידעני ודרש אל המתים

Let no one be found among you who consigns his son or daughter to the fire, or who is an augur, a soothsayer, a diviner, a sorcerer,one who casts spells, or one who consults ghosts or familiar spirits, or one who inquires of the dead.

Thus one should not consult ghosts. The context of this verse however is more about idolatry than say, mere interaction. This is also repeated in Leviticus 19:31. That being said, many Jewish sources have historically also advised against any involvement with ghosts. For instance, Ibn Ezra says to not seek to request their services (as Saul did I Samuel 28:8). This implies that the main prohibition is to use the ghosts to inquire from them - i.e. reaching out to ghosts first. My question is then, what if the (neutral) ghosts are the ones who reach out to us (to say, only chat with us)? Are we to simply ignore the ghost and avoid the contact? What if the said ghost refuses to go away (if we ignore it or if we tell it to go away)? This all relates to how far would the halachic prohibitions apply and what we should do in such a case for its questionable whether it would even be a halachic prohibition in this context.

The answer to this question should probably avoid sources like Rambam who didn't believe that ghosts existed and/or could be communicated with. This question is according to the other perspective.

Answer 1

Based on the writings by Rabbi Ullman, he quotes the following sources:

Yoreh Deah 179:14 To take an oath from a sick person to return after his death in order to answer whatever one may ask is permitted. And there are those who permit this even after death if he doesn't swear the body of the deceased, just his soul.

Furthermore, Rabbi Ullman quotes a story “Reb Yechiel, the father of the Rosh, and R' Shelomo HaCohen made a pact with each other that whoever died first would appear to the other and reveal what occurred to him after death. R' Yechiel died first, and at his burial in front of the assembled congregation, R' Shelomo reminded the deceased of their pact. After several days, R' Yechiel appeared to R' Shelomo while he was learning in the synagogue. R' Yechiel told him that he has great pleasure in heaven and he was also given permission to appear to people, and even to go to his home as when he was alive. Six months later, at midnight on the Sabbath, R' Yechiel appeared to his wife and told her that the authorities had decreed that all Jews in the province would be murdered in the morning. She fled with her family during the night and in this way they were saved. [from Chida, Shem HaGedolim, Gedolim, R' Eliezer bar Natan 199. The Chida writes that he found a hand written manuscript of R' Chaim Vital which records finding a letter of R' Yehuda, son of the Rosh, in which he attests to hearing this account from the Rosh himself.

Finally, Rabbi Ullman quotes Kala Rabati ch. 2: Rabbi Akiva went to a certain place where he found a person who was carrying a load on his shoulders but was having a hard time walking with it and was screaming and groaning. He said to him, what have you done?' He replied, there wasn't a sin I didn't transgress and now there are watchmen over me and they don't let me rest.' Rabbi Akiva asked him, 'did you leave over a son?' He replied, 'by your life, don't delay me [by your questions] for I am in dread of the angels that hit me with rays of fire and they say to me, why don't you go faster?' He asked [again], who did you leave behind?' He replied, 'I left behind a pregnant wife.' Rabbi Akiva went to the place [of the apparition]. He asked them, where is the son of that person?' They replied, 'may his memory be blotted out and his bones crushed.' He asked, why?' They replied, he was a bandit who destroyed people and distressed the populace. In addition he had illicit relations with a betrothed girl on Yom Kippur.' He went to the home of his pregnant wife and waited until she gave birth. He circumcised [the son] and when he grew older he set him up in the synagogue to pray for the congregation. Some time later Rabbi Akiva went to the place where he had originally seen the apparition]. He appeared to him and told him, 'may your mind be put at ease for you have put my mind at ease.

© All rights reserved to R. Yirmiyahu Ullman. Any copy of this material must include the following: This is one of a ten part self-study series taken from www. RabbiUllman.com.

Answer 2

The Kitzur Shulchan Aruch in סימן קסו - שלא לנחש לעונן ולכשף says

:סעיף ה' אָסוּר לִדְרוֹשׁ בִּמְכַשְּׁפִים אֶלָּא בִּמְקוֹם סַכָּנַת נְפָשׁוֹת, אוֹ אִם בָּא לוֹ אֵיזֶה חֳלִי עַל יְדֵי כִשּׁוּף אוֹ מִקְרֶה וְרוּחַ רָעָה, מֻתָּר לְהִתְרַפְּאוֹת עַל יְדֵי מְכַשֵׁף גּוֹי.‏

One may not deal with magic, (divinations, etc. - as you can see from the title of the section), but if, [for example] one has an ailment caused by magic, bad spirits [or the like], one may go to a non-Jew to get healed.

So it seems, that one does not "ignore" contact with the spirits/ghosts/etc. but, as a Jew, one may not interact with them. One may use the help of a non-Jew to rid oneself of their presence.

Answer 3

There's a story in the Talmud (Brachot 18) about a fellow who goes to sleep in the graveyard for a few years in a row, on Yom Kippour evening.

He hears ghosts (souls/spirits of young girls buried there) talking about when will be the best time to plant in the upcoming year.

He implements what he learnt and his crop succeeded.

We do not see that he was condemned for listening or acting on his information. We do see that he did not interact with the ghosts.

The full story, as translated here along with some analysis of what this all could mean:

There was a story of a pious man who gave a coin to a pauper during years of famine. His wife became angry with him, and he went to sleep in the cemetery. He heard two spirits talking to each other.

One said to the other: Let us go travel in the world and hear from behind the curtain what punishment is coming to the world.

She said to her: I cannot because I am buried in a mat of reeds. You go and tell me what you hear.

She went out and came back.

Her friend said: What did you hear behind the curtain?

She said to her: I heard that anyone who plants at the time of the first rainfall will have their crops struck by hail.

He [the pious fellow] went and planted during the second rainfall. The entire world's crops were stricken but not those of this fellow.

The next year, he went to sleep in the cemetery. He heard two spirits talking to each other.

One said to the other: Let us go travel in the world and hear from behind the curtain what punishment is coming to the world.

She said to her: I cannot because I am buried in a mat of reeds. You go and tell me what you hear.

She went out and came back.

Her friend said: What did you hear behind the curtain?

She said to her: I heard that anyone who plants at the time of the second rainfall will have their crops struck by blight.

He [the pious fellow] went and planted at time of the first rainfall. The entire world's crops were struck by blight but not those of this fellow.

His wife asked him: How come last year, everyone's crops were stricken except yours, and now everyone's crops were blighted except yours?

He told her the whole story. They said: It was not many days before a quarrel developed between the pious fellow's wife and the mother of that [deceased] girl.

She said to her: Come and I will show you your daughter buried in a mat of reeds.

The next year, he went to sleep in the cemetery. He heard those spirits talking to each other.

One said to the other: Let us go travel in the world and hear from behind the curtain what punishment is coming to the world.

She said to her: Leave me be. The words passed between us are heard among the living.

Answer 4

A literal reading of Ketubot 103a would seem to suggest that R. Yehuda HaNasi would come and interact with his family after his death:

תנו רבנן, בשעת פטירתו של רבי, אמר: לבני אני צריך. נכנסו בניו אצלו. אמר להם: הזהרו בכבוד אמכם. נר יהא דלוק במקומו, שולחן יהא ערוך במקומו, מטה תהא מוצעת במקומה ... מאי טעמא? כל בי שמשי הוה אתי לביתיה. ההוא בי שמשא אתאי שבבתא, קא קריה אבבא, אמרה אמתיה: שתיקו, דרבי יתיב. כיון דשמע, שוב לא אתא, שלא להוציא לעז על צדיקים הראשונים.‏

The Sages taught: At the time of the passing of Rabbi Yehuda HaNasi, he said: I need my sons. His sons entered his room. He said to them: Be careful with the honor of your mother. He said further: My lamp should be lit in its usual place, my table should be set in its usual place, and the bed should be arranged in its usual place ... What is the reason he made these requests? Every Shabbat eve, even after his passing, Rabbi Yehuda HaNasi would come to his house as he had done during his lifetime. It happened on a certain Shabbat eve that a neighbor came by and called and knocked at the door. His maidservant said to her: Be quiet, for Rabbi Yehuda HaNasi is sitting. When he heard his maidservant reveal his presence to the neighbor, he did not come again, so as not to cast aspersions on earlier righteous individuals who did not appear to their families following their death.

In fact, Sefer Hassidim 1129 goes as far as to write that R. Yehuda HaNasi would recite kiddush for those present.