THIS QUESTION IS ONLY IN JEST. "Purim Torah" is humorous and satirical writings customarily read on the Jewish holiday of Purim. Mi Yodeya has a great collection of Purim Torah, under this tag. For our collection of *real* Q&A about Judaism, see our home page: judaism.stackexchange.com.
From Wikipedia on Purim Torah:
Purim Torah is a term used to describe humorous and satirical writings customarily read on the Jewish holiday of Purim. Purim Torah can be simple or elaborate, and require no qualifications to write, other than a good sense of humor. Purim Torah authors, often displaying an amazing grasp of Jewish knowledge, playfully use some of the far-fetched methods of Talmudic logic and Biblical exegesis in order to reach absurd conclusions.
Purim Torah is allowed on this site, but only if it follows the Purim Torah policy.
For real Q&A about Purim, see the purim tag. For real Q&A about all kinds of other Judaism topics, see our home page.