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21 votes
Accepted

"Anyone who saves a life is as if he saved an entire world": Jewish life or any life?

In the manuscript Parma 3173 there is no "מישראל"; In the manuscript Budapest Kaufman A50 no more; The Mishna of Mechon Mamre, Mishna Sanhedrin 4:5 based on Rambam manuscript idem; לפיכך נברא ...
kouty's user avatar
  • 22.8k
12 votes
Accepted

Can a fiance sleep at his in-law's?

This opinion comes from the Rama in EH 55:1, and Rav Soloveitchik was makpid on this (Nefesh HaRav pg.255). Text of Rama: הארוסה, אסורה לבעלה מדברי סופרים, כל זמן שהיא בבית אביה; והבא על ארוסתו בבית ...
sam's user avatar
  • 42.1k
9 votes
Accepted

Lighting Menorah in remembrance of our dear Jewish friend

Thanks for your consideration in asking this ahead of time. It seems to me that, not only would it not be disrespectful to light a Chanukah menorah in memory of your friend, it would be fairly ...
msh210's user avatar
  • 73.4k
9 votes

One shouldn't drink water in front of others - but other drinks are OK - why?

Water is explicitly mentioned as problematic in the Talmud. Bechorot 44b אמר רבי אבא בריה דרבי חייא בר אבא משתינין מים בפני רבים ואין שותין מים בפני רבים ותניא נמי הכי משתינין מים בפני רבים ואין ...
Alex's user avatar
  • 49.6k
7 votes

When is it acceptable to be impolite or rude

No it is never ok to be rude. As Jews, we have to set the standard and example for others. Indeed, this was the difference between Yaakov and Eisav. The Zohar on Parshas Toldos writes: וַיַּעַשׂ גַּם ...
Dov's user avatar
  • 33.5k
6 votes

Where does it say it’s not about the job but rather it’s the merits?

Kiddushin 82a: רבי מאיר אומר: לעולם ילמד אדם את בנו אומנות נקיה וקלה, ויתפלל למי שהעושר והנכסים שלו. שאין אומנות שאין בה עניות ועשירות, שלא עניות מן האומנות, ולא עשירות מן האומנות, אלא הכל לפי זכותו. ...
Joel K's user avatar
  • 43.8k
5 votes

Can a fiance sleep at his in-law's?

I can see two sources in the talmud: A. Avodah Zarah 58b מאי א"ל אסור משום לך לך אמרין נזירא סחור סחור לכרמא לא תקרב Rabbi Asi repeated his question: What is the halakha? Rabbi Yoḥanan said ...
Joe Howard's user avatar
5 votes

Lighting Menorah in remembrance of our dear Jewish friend

Assuming you aren't Jewish, there would be no mitzvah (commandment) for you to light the menorah, but I don't see anything wrong with it. I will add that perhaps the best way to honor your deceased ...
ezra's user avatar
  • 18.8k
5 votes

Title to use when addressing a rav

The Shulchan Aruch (in Yore De'ah סימן רמב - שלא להורות בפני הרב, ודין רב שמחל על כבודו) discusses greeting one's Rav - and mentions that one doesn't greet him as one does any other person, and ...
Danny Schoemann's user avatar
5 votes

How can we get people to stop talking (much, loudly) during minyan?

My personal experience, as Shaliach tzibur, to silence the Schul talkers has been to stop as soon as I sensed any utterances coming from the congregation. Following a few seconds of showing my "...
Shmuel Shimshoni's user avatar
5 votes
Accepted

Halacha of not biting into a sandwich when someone else is eating with you

I don't know about the choking, but it says clearly in Shulchan Aruch Orach Chaim 170:10 that one should not bite into food and put it back down, and the commentaries say that's because it's ...
shmosel's user avatar
  • 3,917
5 votes

Jewish table manners

Indeed there is a prohibition called Bal Teshaktzu, not to be disgusting. This is codified in the Shulchan Aruch (YD 116:6). In his commentary on this law, the Kaf Hachaim speaks of your case, writing ...
mbloch's user avatar
  • 52.9k
5 votes

When is it acceptable to be impolite or rude

The Ramban advises in his Iggeres Haramban (Sefaria translation taken from here): Accustom yourself to always speak all of your words calmly, to every man and at every time. In doing so you will ...
ElonMusk's user avatar
  • 477
4 votes

How are we supposed to interpret "Derech eretz kadma l'Torah"?

R. Yaakov Kamenetzky explains this Midrash in his commentary to Parshat Lech Lecha, and he cites it as "derech eretz kadma laTorah". He discusses there why Avraham had to go rescue Lot. He writes that ...
Alex's user avatar
  • 49.6k
4 votes
Accepted

Is there a problem of גניבת דעת (deception) when one is served a food and he dislikes the taste, and he says "This tastes delicious!"?

Telling the truth is very important as the Torah writes "distance yourself from a lie" (Shemot 23:7). The parameters of telling the truth vary though and there are four types of circumstances where ...
mbloch's user avatar
  • 52.9k
4 votes
Accepted

Is there any rabbinical precedent, ancient or recent, to tell somebody that they are Jewish?

"Kol Yisrael areyvim zeh lazeh" "All Israel are responsible for one another" (see Talmud Sanhedrin 27b; Shavuos 39a) This talmudic dictum is the source that we are responsible as Jews to make sure (...
David Kenner's user avatar
  • 10.8k
4 votes
Accepted

"Laughing at" prominent rabbonim?

There are many examples of our sages, talking to each other in a common way, mocking (seriously or in a humorous manner), or even playing tricks at each other. Some examples: כתובות עג א רב פפא ...
Alaychem goes to Codidact's user avatar
4 votes
Accepted

Spitting on the ground

R. Yishaq Zilberstein fielded the following question and addressed it with his responsum (Hashuke Hemed, p. 664): האם ראוי שלא לירוק על אדמת ארץ ישראל שאלה: שמעתי שהצדיקים רבי אליהו לאפיאן זצ"ל ...
Deuteronomy's user avatar
  • 8,524
3 votes

Lack of refinement – sourced examples other than eating in the market

שבת קה ב ר"ש בן אלעזר אומר משום חילפא בר אגרא שאמר משום ר' יוחנן בן נורי המקרע בגדיו בחמתו והמשבר כליו בחמתו והמפזר מעותיו בחמתו יהא בעיניך כעובד ע"ז Shabat 105:b R' Shimon says, in the ...
Alaychem goes to Codidact's user avatar
3 votes

"Anyone who saves a life is as if he saved an entire world": Jewish life or any life?

The Bavli [Sanhedrin 37a] does say "a Jewish life": But the Yerushalmi [Sanhedrin 4:1 (22a)] does not: When the two Talmuds disagree, the Bavli wins. But here they do NOT disagree. One is simply ...
Maurice Mizrahi's user avatar
3 votes

Are men allowed to refer to another man's wife by her first name?

Ben Yehoyada Sotah 2a Igra D’Kallah, Lech Lecha 17:15 Taz, EH 21; Igra D’Kallah, Bereishis 17:15; Gur Aryeh, Vayikra 1:1; Levushah Shel Torah ch. 81
Lanied Sofey's user avatar
3 votes
Accepted

Maintaining A Convert's Privacy

Bava Metzia is talking about ona'at devarim -- verbal abuse. Ona'a from the same root as koneh (I think that's R' Hirsch) -- I want to dominate that person and make them feel "less than." So ...
Shalom's user avatar
  • 134k
3 votes

Is there a mitzvah not to ignore a person?

The Gemara says: One who does not respond to a greeting is called a robber. [Berakhot 6b]
Maurice Mizrahi's user avatar
2 votes

May one complain to G-d?

In Meseches Kiddushin 80b it's written: And the Rabbis, who render seclusion forbidden even then, hold in accordance with the statement of Rabbi Yitzḥak, as Rabbi Yitzḥak says as follows with ...
Gavriel's user avatar
  • 9,728
2 votes

When one is home alone, does the Torah discourage the eating of bizarre food mixtures?

אָסְרוּ חֲכָמִים מַאֲכָלוֹת וּמַשְׁקִין שֶׁנֶּפֶשׁ רֹב בְּנֵי אָדָם קִהָה מֵהֶן כְּגוֹן מַאֲכָלוֹת וּמַשְׁקִין שֶׁנִּתְעָרֵב בָּהֶן קִיא אוֹ צוֹאָה וְלֵחָה סְרוּחָה וְכַיּוֹצֵא בָּהֶן. וְכֵן אָסְרוּ ...
LN6595's user avatar
  • 5,370
2 votes

"Anyone who saves a life is as if he saved an entire world": Jewish life or any life?

Given the context of the Mishnah - the process by which someone is put to death by the Sanhedrin - I had always assumed it referred to a Jew because only Jews can be killed by the Sanhedrin, as non-...
DonielF's user avatar
  • 34.3k
2 votes
Accepted

If I have behaved badly, should I hide the fact that I'm Jewish?

No, he/she should not conceal the fact that they are Jewish. When you do this, you say that you worship men more than you worship God. The Jewish people are called to be a nation of priests to the ...
Aaron's user avatar
  • 11.1k
2 votes

How are we supposed to interpret "Derech eretz kadma l'Torah"?

1) You have found the correct source. "דרך ארץ קדמה לתורה", ~~ "Derech eretz should come before Torah." is actually a paraphrase of the line of Medrash you quoted "...קדמה דרך ארץ את התורה..." ("......
David Kenner's user avatar
  • 10.8k

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