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Results tagged with purim-torah-in-jest
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user 16354
THIS QUESTION IS ONLY IN JEST. "Purim Torah" is humorous and satirical writings customarily read on the Jewish holiday of Purim. Mi Yodeya has a great collection of Purim Torah, under this tag. For our collection of *real* Q&A about Judaism, see our home page: judaism.stackexchange.com.
8
votes
PTIJ: Aharon, King of Egypt
An anonymous friend of mine answers:
שמות רבה (וילנא) פרשת ויקהל פרשה מח
ד וכל...בית הכהונה ובית המלכות, יוכבד נטלה כהונה ומלכות אהרן
Yocheved inherited the priesthood and the kingship of Aar …
- 21.2k
2
votes
PTIJ: It's not Rosh Chodesh Adar for me yet. Do I need to filter PTIJ posts?
I would think that due to the concept of דאקדומי פורימתורה לא מקדמינן (which is the Girsa of some Acharonim on Megillah 5a), one would be Chayav to filter it. However, the Ritva (Megillah 5a) says:
…
- 21.2k
8
votes
Accepted
PTIJ: India is the size of an olive - so what?
You have misunderstood the Psak. It is referring to the Kezayis of turkey that one must eat on Thanksgiving, as per the Gemara here.
- 21.2k
7
votes
PTIJ: Can't find the fifth chelek of shulchan aruch
In the question you linked to, it says in the name of Rav Chaim that it was unwritten. However, Rav Chaim was mistaken, as Common Sense was written in 1776 by Thomas Paine.
You can buy it from Amazo …
- 21.2k
3
votes
Accepted
PTIJ - Clarification on כן
We simply must look up the first time "Kein" appears in Tanach, and use the context there.
It first appears in Bereishis 1:7:
וַיַּ֣עַשׂ אֱלֹהִים֮ אֶת־הָרָקִ֒יעַ֒ וַיַּבְדֵּ֗ל בֵּ֤ין הַמַּ֙יִם֙ א …
- 21.2k
5
votes
PTIJ: Why do Ipods come in only 3 colors?
One answer is that that was only the first generation of Ipods. In the second generation there were more colors, as is said (Shemos 25:7):
מִלֻּאִים לָאֵפֹד
Another possibility is that the oth …
- 21.2k
5
votes
PTIJ: In what way was King David a maskil?
Tehillim 53:1 and 54:1 note that he was a Maskil of songs. He must have composed poetry in Hebrew or some other equally Maskilish activity.
- 21.2k
1
vote
PTIJ: If Bernie Sanders had been elected, would Eruvei Chatzeiros have become unnecessary?
Sometimes, the question is the best answer.
Here's a slightly edited quote:
Since Bernie Sanders ran on a communist platform, had he won, everyone's property would have been owned by everyone, an …
- 21.2k
8
votes
Accepted
PTIJ: Is Super Mario Odyssey a Basar B'Chalav issue?
This is absolutely amazing. The Ralbag (Devarim 3:1, Toaliyos) says that a person will receive a punishment for playing Mario, and if one doesn't realize that he was hit for playing Mario, he will no …
- 21.2k
4
votes
PTIJ: Why does Hashem have an onion
God actually has two onions, which each serve different purposes (Koheles 7:12):
בְּצֵ֥ל הַֽחׇכְמָ֖ה בְּצֵ֣ל הַכָּ֑סֶף
The first onion grants knowledge to those who partake in it, the second gra …
- 21.2k
1
vote
PTIJ: Am I betrothed to her?
Yes, but in order to do so, you will need to change your email address to [email protected], which means you have to move to Nicaragua.
- 21.2k
3
votes
PTIJ: What does Purim have to do with Pesach?
In Shemuel B 12:22 it explains the outcome of the Gezeirah Shavah:
צַ֖מְתִּי וָאֶבְכֶּ֑ה כִּ֤י אָמַ֙רְתִּי֙ מִ֣י יוֹדֵ֔עַ
This proves that there must be a fast day prior to reciting "Mi Yodeya". …
- 21.2k
2
votes
PTIJ: B'nai Yisra'el and Kashi in the desert
In Devarim 11:11, Moshe says that Eretz Yisrael is an ארץ הרים ובקעות, a land of hills and valleys. One of those valleys is the "Nature Valley", so in order that Benei Yisrael not become complacent w …
- 21.2k
4
votes
PTIJ - Why does Rabeinu Hanan'el wear that hat?
It is a Davar Yadua that many Talmidei Chachamim wear strange looking hats in the winter. It is likely that at least some parts of the first printing of the Vilna Shas was completed in the winter, so …
- 21.2k
0
votes
PTIJ - Please resolve apparent conflict on what was supposed to be thrown for the plaugue of...
There is another interpretation of וזרקו משה השמימה לעיני פרעה that make more sense in this case. Some translate this Passuk as:
And Moshe shall throw Pharaoh's eyes into the sky
If this is the …
- 21.2k