Questions tagged [social-convention]

The tag has no usage guidance.

Filter by
Sorted by
Tagged with
7
votes
1answer
111 views

Appropriate bat mitzvah gift from non-jew

I am attending my bosses's daughters bat mitzvah and I'm not sure what is appropriate to give as a gift. I was thinking just cash or gift card like I would do for any other birthday party I would go ...
14
votes
4answers
332 views

On what social issues were the rabbis ahead of their times?

On what social issues were the rabbis (Chazal and rishonim) ahead of their times? That is, which social/political matters subject to wide agreement today were shared by Chazal before these views ...
-1
votes
1answer
66 views

What official position did Moses have acc. to Torah?

The Torah speaks of a couple of official public positions, that have extensive Halachic Nafka-Minahs, e.g. Kohen Gadol, Jewish king, a Judge, maybe Nessi Shevet. IIRC Moses wasn't officially any of ...
1
vote
1answer
59 views

What is the proper way to address someone with s'micha who doesn't work as a rabbi?

If a person received semicha (rabbinical certification) from a yeshiva upon successful completion of the necessary curriculum, but is a lay person, for instance, a businessman ,rather than a ...
11
votes
3answers
5k views

Is it appropriate for a Gentile to attend and/or participate in a Seder?

The context: last year, I saw this sign that announced the time and place that a Jewish Seder (probably Yom Kippur) would happen. I was definitely curious and considered going and at least observing ...
9
votes
4answers
338 views

Why ask guest to make kiddush?

In my limited experiences in Baltimore and Lakewood, it seems hosts often ask guests if they would like to "make their own kiddush" with a separate cup of wine. Is there a reason why guests wouldn't ...
4
votes
1answer
106 views

Asking the husband about the wife אַיֵּה שָׂרָה אִשְׁתֶּךָ - what are the views of contemporary poskim?

Rashi on Braishis 18 (9) says We learn that a person should ask in his lodging place of the husband about the wife, and of the wife about the husband The Shulchan Oruch Horav says One may ...
3
votes
2answers
162 views

Gemar Hatima Tova vs. Hatima Tova vs. Gemar Tov

When do we wish Gemar Hatima Tova , Hatima Tova and Gemar Tov? What are the differences between the three? Does it relate to the High Holiday schedule?
2
votes
2answers
605 views

Shaking hands loosely

Many religiously observant men I've met, irrespective of their 'edah (cultural persuasion, e.g. Ashkenazi, Sefaradi, Teimani), have shaken my hand more loosely than secular or Gentile men (who ...
2
votes
1answer
75 views

Why do people respond “Gam L'mar”?

During this past Rosh Hashanna and Yom Kippur, whenever I wished someone Shanah Tovah or (G'mar) Chatimah Tovah s/he responded Gam L'mar. I don't recall having heard that before this year. Doesn't ...
3
votes
3answers
103 views

Greeting other people (Jews and Non-Jews alike)

At work, some amount of interaction is inevitable. There are some people that I just don't feel like greeting. What is the Jewish view on this issue? What does the Halachah say about 'greeting one ...
7
votes
1answer
135 views

History of chattan & kallah classes

A common practice in some segments of today's Jewish world is for brides and grooms to attend "Chattan/kallah classes" where the attendees receive instruction and advice on relationship dynamics and ...
2
votes
1answer
4k views

What is the proper greeting for Yom HaShoah (Holocaust Day)?

Here in Israel, there are many customs surrounding Yom HaShoah; the morning siren, ceremonies, storytelling from survivors, etc. However, I'm not sure I've ever heard a way to greet someone that ...
24
votes
11answers
5k views

Is there such a thing as “too Orthodox”?

When my family started attending the local synagogue we stuck out like a sore thumb. We moved from a Jewish area of Toronto to a small town with one Synagogue. I cover Everything, my husband was the ...
11
votes
5answers
9k views

Correct response to tizku l'mitzvot

What is the correct response to someone saying, "tizku l'mitzvot" after you do a mitzvah, or something helpful? For example, after helping someone make an Eruv Chatzeirot they might say "tizku l'...
6
votes
1answer
293 views

Why don't more orthodox Jews homeschool?

Given the significant cost of Jewish day-school tuition (at least in the US) and the negative experience that some students have in those day schools (I'm speaking from my own experience as well as ...
3
votes
2answers
97 views

What is the best way to correct someone who has unwittingly violated halacha in public?

At a recent shul kiddush on shabbat I witnessed someone perform a melacha seemingly on purpose two or three times. It was clear to me that this person was unaware of a certain halacha. I did not know ...
25
votes
4answers
906 views

Maintaining Tzniut in Uncomfortable Social Situations

How can a teenage girl, who recently started practicing the laws of tzniut as well as feasible, balance those laws with the prohibition against embarrassing her family members, who are embarrassed to ...
7
votes
1answer
578 views

Is there a salutation/greeting recognizing the last day of Channukah for my Jewish friends?

Is there a salutation/greeting recognizing the last day of Channukah for my Jewish friends? At the beginning of this holiday, I wish them well. Is there a similar phrase that I should use as this ...
-1
votes
2answers
92 views

Is Hashem polite? [closed]

This question might be a bit weird, but here's what inspired it. In an internet forum I frequent, someone posted a wall of text (that is, a long post without any line breaks or paragraphs). I pointed ...
10
votes
1answer
604 views

First use of modern names for books of Torah

Today, it is common practice to use Bereshis, Shemos, Vayikra, Bamidbar, Devarim as the names of the five books of the Torah, but this was not always the case. As an example, the Talmud refers to ...
1
vote
0answers
93 views

Issues with drinking with non-Jewish coworkers [duplicate]

I work at a company with many non-Jews and often we will go out to celebrate milestones we hit. What are the issues with going out to drink with them if I order a bottle of unopened beer ?
15
votes
5answers
1k views

Why do we say “You should live till 120”?

Prior to the Mabul people lived for hundreds of years. After the Mabul lifespans shortened although we see that the Avos lived in the 180 year range. In the Pasuk in Tehilim we say Yemei Shenoseinu ...
1
vote
0answers
55 views

What is Invitation? [closed]

It seems to be a Jewish custom (even great Rabbis do it) to invite people to at least weddings (maybe also bar mitzvah (but maybe not to a bris) What is the idea of this invitation? Is it a command ...
6
votes
1answer
611 views

Source of phrase “tizkeh l'mitzvos”

I have noticed that when I give money to people who collect in shul, they often respond by saying "tizkeh l'mitzvos." Are there any sources before relatively recently for using this phrase?
5
votes
1answer
598 views

“Hamakom” after shiv'a

In my experience, for the most part, "‏המקום ינחם אתכם בתוך שאר אבלי ציון וירושלים" is said to a mourner specifically during shiv'a. However, I've heard some people say it after shiv'a, particularly ...
5
votes
2answers
2k views

What's a common blessing given to people at a bar mitzvah?

What is a common blessing given to the bar mitzvah boy when attending his bar mitzvah? What is a common blessing given to the friends and family of the bar mitzvah boy when attending a bar mitzvah?
4
votes
0answers
46 views

Where does the phrase בס"ד come from? [duplicate]

People will sometimes mark their papers with the phrase בס"ד or ב"ה, I know what they mean but where does the idea of putting them on comes from. Is there and basis in the Torah or do any Rabbis have ...
0
votes
2answers
207 views

Title to use when addressing a rav

When speaking to the rav of a community, what title should one use? "Hello, Rabbi X" would surely be acceptable for someone with regular semicha, but perhaps not for a person who is referred to as "...
8
votes
5answers
9k views

What does Heimishe mean? [closed]

Literally it means "homey." But I'm asking about the sociological meaning of the group of people who call themselves "Heimishe." My best guess is that it means "midway between Hassidish and Litvak." ...
2
votes
1answer
375 views

Standard engagement timeframe in modern Orthodox and Yishivish circles

I am recently new to this shidduchim scene and I am wondering what standard engagement timeframes are for the out-of-town modern orthodox and Yishivish circles. Once a couple becomes engaged how long ...
1
vote
1answer
172 views

Why do we use the masculine form in a Shabbat greeting?

My Israeli friend explained to me that the word "שבת" is a feminine word, since the plural uses the feminine ending - it is שבתות. If this is true, why is a common greeting שבת שלום ומבורך using the ...
8
votes
3answers
629 views

Are “Vorts” just engagement parties?

Is the typical "vort" that is celebrated in many Orthodox communities when a couple gets engaged of any actual significance from a Jewish perspective (Halachic / Hashkafic) or is it just a way of ...
9
votes
1answer
179 views

Is it better to say a blessing quietly or loudly?

Often I have lunch with colleagues, most of whom are not religious (and sometimes some of them are not Jewish). When I say the short blessing before eating, is it better to say it loudly or quietly? ...
15
votes
4answers
5k views

B'siyata D'shmaya or Baruch Hashem

Often, at the top of written work, Jews write either ב"ה, which stands for Baruch Hashem =blessed is the Name i.e., God, or בס"ד, which stands for b'siyata d'shmaya =with Heavenly help. What is the ...
2
votes
0answers
35 views

Zissin Pesach - Where does this phrase come from?

What is the history of wishing a zissin - sweet Pesach? Was this purposely created, as someone once told me, in contrast to wishing a Chag kosher vesameach?
6
votes
3answers
748 views

Why is Shmoneh Esreh referred to as 18 blessings when there are actually 19?

Originally Shmoneh Esreh only had 18 blessings, thus the name "Shemoneh Esreh." However, subsequently a 19th blessing was added of Velamalshinim regarding the heretics. If there are 19 blessings now, ...
2
votes
1answer
101 views

A Bar Mitzvah question

A friend asked me if I would ask you for your help. He was wondering if all boys in Conservative sects give a d'var on their bar Mitzvah, or is that not until after the bar Mitzvah? Thoughts please? ...
0
votes
1answer
5k views

Ah freilichen purim .. English please

I was wondering how to say Ah freilichen Purim in proper English. Is it universal like Gut Yomtiv (or is that also an assumption...) or do you just say Have a Happy Purim - the literal translation. ( ...
0
votes
3answers
172 views

Is there an issue of arrogance to wear Tfilin Rabenu Tam

I have been putting on tefilin shel Rashi for many years and a friend recently said I should start putting on Tefilin Rabenu Tam as well. The Kitzur Shulchan Aruch says that only the especially pious ...
6
votes
1answer
395 views

How to suggest a kosher restaurant for a meeting?

A colleague suggested a restaurant for a meeting which is not glatt kosher or non kosher. What is a good way to recommend a different restaurant which is glatt kosher without offending him? Would a ...
3
votes
1answer
499 views

What age is the kapoteh donned in Chabad circles?

The kapoteh is a long black frock coat worn by some Lithuanian Jews and Chabad Chassidim. It is very similar to a bekishe. I was wondering what age do most Chabad Chassidim start wearing the kapoteh. ...
4
votes
1answer
258 views

Should Jewish men be courteous to women in public?

I always heard that it is not modest to publicly be courteous to woman (if a Jewish woman needs help you should help her, but if she does not, just you are holding the door for her or giving her the ...
7
votes
3answers
3k views

What is the correct response to “Chazaq u'Baruch!”?

When a person gets an aliyah or other synagogue privilege the congregants of an Ashkenazic synagogue generally thanks him by saying "Shokyach!" or "Yasherkoach!" to which he responds "Baruch Tehiye!". ...
4
votes
1answer
113 views

What does LAYT stand for?

I received a letter from a rabbi, in his capacity of leading a Jewish institution, that opened with Dear _____, LAYT I assume, given the context, that "LAYT" is some sort of Jewish blessing or ...
3
votes
1answer
151 views

Hospitalized - visit by my Rabbi

I am a member of a Chabad shul here in an Asian capital city. Most members of our wonderfully diverse Jewish community are not Hasidic. This is so in my case. I now find myself in a local hospital run ...
3
votes
2answers
400 views

When did shuckling begin?

There was nothing that I could locate in Mishnah Berurah or similar halachic sources that indicates that one should shuckle (sway) during prayers. When did this custom begin, and why? I notice that ...
0
votes
2answers
244 views

How to divide the honors at a wedding?

How are the kibudim at a typical Yeshivish American chasuna divided up between the choson's side and the kallah's side?
11
votes
3answers
2k views

What's an appropriate greeting for Motzei Yom Kippur?

What's an appropriate way to greet people after Yom Kippur? It seems to be a little late for g'mar chatima tovah, and many people associate shvua tov with Motzei Shabbat.
2
votes
3answers
430 views

Postponing circumcision: what consequences?

I am an atheist (not Jewish) and my soon-to-be wife is Jewish (Ashkenazi of Polish ascent). She doesn't practice, and she says she is not a believer. We are French and live in Paris. This may or may ...