Questions tagged [mourning-aveilus]

A halachic period of mourning after the passing of a close relative. There are many laws and customs relating to this period and those observing it.

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34 views

Why do mourners study Mishnah Kelim, Ch. 24 and Mikvaos, Ch. 7?

Mourners traditionally study two chapters of the Mishnah, these two chapters being Kelim Ch. 24 and Mikvaos Ch. 7. Besides these sections having to do with ritual purity, what is the underlying ...
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How can the mourner remarry within one month, if he has to wait two regalim?

Moed katan (21b): מתה אשתו ונשא אשה אחרת — אינו רשאי ליכנס לביתו לדבר עמו ]תנחומין, [כדי שלא לפגוע באשה החדשה. If it was the mourner’s wife who died and he married another woman within thirty ...
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Giving Gift to Mourning Spouse?

Although the Rema (YD 385:3) writes ואסור לשלוח מנות לאבל על אביו ואמו כל י"ב חדש - It is forbidden to send [or bring] gifts to one who is in mourning for his father or mother, throughout the ...
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Proper day and time for a Shloshim Seuda

Per Chabad.org: "Traditionally, families gather on the eve of the Shloshim to share support, recite prayers and Psalms, and to give charity in the merit of the deceased. Many will also make a Siyum, ...
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Prohibition to Wear Freshly Laundered Clothes in the 9 days

Normally is customary to avoid wearing freshly laundered clothes during the 9 days. Does this apply these days when freshly laundered clothes are no longer exciting and new? Perhaps the parallel today ...
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Mourning for only certain relatives?

After learning the Rambam (Mourning 1:10) וְכֵן הָאֶפִּיקוֹרוֹסִין [וְהַמּוּמָרִים] וְהַמּוֹסְרִין כָּל אֵלּוּ אֵין מִתְאַבְּלִין עֲלֵיהֶן it seems that we don't mourn for these categories of ...
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Why doesn't our decrease of joy extend beyond Tish'a B'Av?

Citing from here There is a famous Mishnah that is cited towards the end of Masechet Ta’anit (4:6) that states: “Mishenichnas Av, Mema’atin Besimcha” “When the month of Av arrives, we ...
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271 views

Is one allowed to attend a wake for a Jew?

As far as I understand, Jews are not allowed to have a wake for a Jewish person. But, let's say for some reason, they do it, anyway. Is a Jew allowed to attend this event if s/he doesn't view the ...
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Do we double mourning and kriah? [duplicate]

There are two separate situations of mourning that (according to many opinions) require the tearing of a garment on the left side -- seeing the Kotel (or an ancient city in Judea) and the passing of a ...
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An “Aveil” at Shabbat Mincha

An aveil (mourner) does not practice public aveilut (mourning) on Shabbat (Ketubot 4a), though he is still in aveilut and there is some impact on what he can and can't do. Would the presence of an ...
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Leftover food from a Shiva house

slightly related to this question: according to the tradition that one should not take food from a Shiva home to eat elsewhere outside the home; does this include taking food after the shiva period ...
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Why does leading the Amud alleviate suffering for the deceased?

A question was asked here on the forum for clarification on the Chiyuv for an Avel to pray for the Amud. And in an answer that was given, the answerer provided a quote from Rabbi Neustadt: "...for ...
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What does it mean for a mourner to “have a chiuv”?

I have noticed that in many synagogues, before davening, the gabbai customarily asks if anybody "has a chiuv". If there is anybody with a chiuv, he is asked to daven from the amud. The people who ...
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Eating an Egg Whole

Is there a basis for this custom that one may not bite into an egg which is still whole, but must be first cut or broken in two, unless it's a time of mourning (aveilut) and only then the egg is ...
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Why was King David allowed to mourn on the floor?

I heard from my rav that one of the laws of a king is that during mourning, he is not allowed to sit on the floor. Rather he sits on a couch, so as not shame his status as the king. If this is true, ...
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May one do the Mitzvah of Nichum Aveilim/Consoling Mourners on Tish'a B'av?

Based on On Tish'a B'Av,can someone say the typical "Mourner's statement" to any/everyone else?, may one perform the mitzvah of Nichum Aveilim for one who is sitting shiv'a on ...
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On Tish'a B'Av,can someone say the typical “Mourner's statement” to any/everyone else?

Upon leaving a mourner (when one visits him / her during shiva), one says: המקום ינחם אתכם בתוך שאר אבילי ציון וירושלים "May G-d comfort you among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem" Since during ...
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Do mourners change their seats in shul today?

The g'mara on Moed Katan 23a says that after shiva, when the mourner stays at home, he can return to shul but does not sit in his usual seat. (According to this g'mara, he returns to his usual seat a ...
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Is tachanun omitted if the mourner in Shiva isn't part of the minyan?

I was at a shiva minyan this morning but the mourner was not there (he was running late from the airport and some people could not wait). He showed up in the middle and went in to another room, then ...
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What defines a “mourner's home” (bet aveil)?

I'm asking this as a follow-up to this question. Certain prayers such as tachanun are omitted when praying in a mourner's home. OU says that this is true even if the mourners are not present. ...
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How did Rabbi Akiva start again after losing 24,000 students?

Where did Rebbi Akiva find the inspiration to pick himself up and teach students again after losing 24,000 students?
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What halachos of mourning apply to a grandchild for his grandparent's death?

What halachos of mourning, if any, apply to a grandchild upon his or her grandparent's death? Do they tear keri'ah upon hearing of the grandparent's death? Do they sit shivah?
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Which mourning laws does an Ashkenazi son follow after his Sefardi mother's death?

An Ashkenazi son (his father was a Yekke) who mourns after his Sefardi mother - does he follow Ashkenazi Minhagim of Avelut (Kaddish for 11 months exactly for example) of Sefardi?
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listening to a cappela during sefira?

A friend of mine told me that there is a problem with listening to a cappela during sefira. A few people mentioned a few places where it talks about it but I don't remember the places. What is the ...
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Dancing on Yom Haatzmaus

One is not allowed to dance during the mourning days of s'firas haomer (Mishna B'rura 493:3). According to all major customs, Yom Haatzmaus (Israel's independence day) falls during the mourning days (...
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Breaking an Omer restriction

In a hypothetical case, I have chosen to observe the restrictions of the Omer during the "first half." But then, I am placed in a situation at which happy live music is being played. Does my presence ...
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Movies and music during the 3 weeks according to Rav Soloveitchik

The Rav compares the 3 weeks to the twelve months of mourning, and following that comparison he permits shaving during the 3 weeks (but not the 9 days) but forbids large social gatherings. What does ...
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God's Nichum Aveilim

Asking for a friend: On Kiddushin 38a, Tosfos s.v. Tzei, explain that Hashem didn't approach Yehoshua until after the 30 days of mourning for Moshe had elapsed, since the Shechinah does not descend ...
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How obligated is one to say Kaddish for a deceased relative?

People often talk about an obligation -- Chiyuv -- to recite Kaddish at every opportunity for some time after the death of a relative. (Which relatives are obligated and for how long does not seem ...
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Kaddish for children

I heard some rabbanim say that if a baby or child is over the age of 30 days, one should say kaddish for him for a year (11 months) while I have heard others say that 11 months is only for a parent ...
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Listening to music during year of aveilut

Is one allowed to listen to music during aveilut after the shloshim for therapeutic porpuses? Is there any difference between the way ashkenazim and sephardim hold?
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Changes in Hilchos Aveilus due to the reaction of gentiles

I just read an article by Rabbi Yair Hoffman regarding images of woman. In the article he mentions that we have in the past changed our Minhagim in Hilchos Aveilus in concern of reaction of gentiles. ...
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Yahrzeit plaque in shul for cremated relatives

Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh Deah) 345:5 states: Those who deviate from the ways of the community, i.e. people who have thrown off the responsibility of mitzvoth from their shoulders, and are not included in ...
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Washing clothing with sand .. how?

Rambam Hilchos Avel 6 (13) refers to washing with sand: ומכבס כסותו במים אבל לא בנתר ולא בחול He may wash his clothes in water, but not with soap or using sand. Is there an explanation of the ...
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What is typically done regarding mourning practices for those who have no relatives?

Simple question - who mourns or says Kaddish for those that die leaving no relatives to sit shiva or say Kaddish for them? I've seen a number of people in various shuls who say Kaddish for non-...
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How to conjugate “their resting place(s)” in Kel Malei Rachamim?

The memorial prayer Kel Malei Rachamim concludes "may they rest in peace in their resting place[s], and let us say Amen." Okay, how to say "resting place[s]." Mishkavam? Mishkaveihem? Mishkevoseihem? ...
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'Aninut when the body can't be released

If someone dies and their body cannot be released for burial for an extended length of time, how are aninut* and aveilut approached? This question might have some similarities to whether there is ...
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Is a Jew allowed to visit a Christian cemetery?

If a Jew wishes to visit a grave at a Christian cemetery (say the grave of a patrilineal grandparent), is it permissible? Does it matter if it is a mostly unadorned cemetery vs. one with pictures of ...
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How to comfort someone who has lost his non-Jewish parent

I came across a (Facebook) post the other day in which an acquaintance announced he had lost his non-Jewish father. The individual is not a convert; his mother had intermarried. The funeral will not ...
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Preparing a grave before death

Is it against Halacha to prepare a grave before someone who passed away i.e. that the doctors and family know that the person is going to pass away but don’t know when so they make preparations. ...
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Should tachanun be said in a mourner's shtiebl?

Many shtiebls are set up as shuls that are part of someone's home. This raises the question as to what is considered a "mourner's home" with regard to saying tachanun. Background: Tachanun is not ...
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Kaddish not being said correctly

Should one respond to a Kaddish that a mourner is not pronouncing the words properly? I don’t know if this question has been asked before, but I found something similar - Is there such a thing as a ...
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To say Kaddish at the cemetery after burial, do the mourners count as part of the minyan?

I understand that onenim cannot be counted as part of the minyan. Thus, at the cemetery, when saying the Kaddish can they be counted as part of the minyan or do we need 10 others besides them?
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Should I rend k'riyah if I witness the death of a non-relative? If so, what's the procedure?

In another question, Chalutznahal cites Yoreh De'ah 340:5, which says that when I witness a fellow Jew die, I must rend my shirt out of sadness. And British Rabbi Dr. Moshe Freedman brings this down ...
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Must EMTs and others rend Kriyah each time they see a patient die?

I was looking at Yoreh De'ah 340:5 (יו"ד סימן ש"מ ס"ק ה) and Moed Katan 25b (כה עמוד ב), which require Kriyah (garment-rending) for all who are there at the time of death. It would seem to me that an ...
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Mourning the death of an infant

If an infant only survives for one day Rachmana litzlan, do the parents have to sit shiva or say kaddish?
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Don't pass bread hand to hand: whose hand?

Shulchan Aruch (OC 167:18) says (in my own translation): The one who slices the loaf of bread places a slice before each person. The individual then takes the slice with his hand. The one who ...
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Mourners by Kabbalat Shabbat

Is there a source that says that someone has to be with a mourner at all times from when he is asked to leave the shul before Lechu Neranena. As I understand the shamash/ warden asks him to leave and ...
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Are Tzitzis obligated in Tzitzis

According to the Rosh (Moed Katan 3:43), a garment worn solely to absorb sweat is not considered a בגד (with regard to the obligation of מצות קריעה - mournful rending). This principle is invoked by ...
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How Avelut is healing, according to Rambam?

The Rambam in Moreh Nevuchim (Chelek 3 Chapter 41) explains that mourning a deceased relative actually heals the great pain an Avel may have: " For mourners find comfort in crying and in excitement ...