Questions tagged [mourning-aveilus]

A halachic period of mourning after the passing of a close relative. There are many laws and customs relating to this period and those observing it.

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42 views

Source Merit of the person who does the burying of spouse

I can’t recall where I saw it, but I somewhat remember is that there is some merit if the husband buries the wife or vice versa. Does anyone know the source for it?
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Mourning for a Noahide Father

This question is different than others I've read regarding mourning a Non-Jewish parent. I'm specifically interested in the case of a Noahide father and a Jewish mother who have divorced. What I ...
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What is the halachic source for the minhagim of mourning during Sefira?

What is the earliest halachic source for the minhagim of mourning during sefira? Note that this does not mean the story of R' Akiva, I'm talking about halachic references to prohibitions such as not ...
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An ovel attending a wedding on zoom

Is it possible for a Jew who is in mourning (an ovel) to attend a wedding on Zoom? My intial thought process was why not? If one cannot be משתתף (join) with a virtual minyan (quorum of 10 men) as all ...
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An “Aveil” at Shabbat Mincha

An aveil (mourner) does not practice public aveilut (mourning) on Shabbat (Ketubot 4a), though he is still in aveilut and there is some impact on what he can and can't do. Would the presence of an ...
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Mourning for a parent for a year

Please provide as many different answers as you can on why is aveilus for a parent for a year and all others is only 30 days. What different heartfelt ideas come to mind? What are some ideas that ...
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Why does Mordechai agree to put on the king's clothing?

From the Megillah, we read that Mordechai put on sack-cloth and ashes upon hearing of Haman's decree. Esther, alarmed to see her cousin in such a state, sends him fine clothes to put on, but he ...
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Public mourning in Shabbos

Why isn’t the custom of changing ones seat in shul considered mourning in public , which is prohibited in Shabbos?
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Checking Tefillin after someone has died [closed]

Is there a source that one shouldn’t check the deceased Tefillin after they have died?
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Can one recite El Maleh Rahamim for a non-Jewish relative?

Is it halachically permissible to recite El Maleh Rahamim for a non-Jewish relative?
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Proper day and time for a Shloshim Seuda

Per Chabad.org: "Traditionally, families gather on the eve of the Shloshim to share support, recite prayers and Psalms, and to give charity in the merit of the deceased. Many will also make a Siyum, ...
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How to comfort someone who has lost his non-Jewish parent

I came across a (Facebook) post the other day in which an acquaintance announced he had lost his non-Jewish father. The individual is not a convert; his mother had intermarried. The funeral will not ...
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Custom of two people not clothing someone together

Probably a common occurrence is when putting clothes on a baby, both parents will try to do it together to make it easier (one puts on the shirt, one puts on the pants, etc.). Someone recently told me ...
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Prohibition to Wear Freshly Laundered Clothes in the 9 days

Normally is customary to avoid wearing freshly laundered clothes during the 9 days. Does this apply these days when freshly laundered clothes are no longer exciting and new? Perhaps the parallel today ...
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Sefardi Hilchot aveilut online

Do we have any sefardi Halachic book (pdf format) in English dealing with Hilchot Aveilut Online? I need it a bit urgently to study it this Tisha b'Av.
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When and why did we stop wearing sackcloth?

When and why did we stop wearing sackcloth in times of mourning and other times of distress (e.g., when fasting for rain)? (I presume sackcloth was quite uncomfortable.) Sackcloth is mentioned in ...
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Can you be menachem avel in silence?

While I know that the practice is to recite the statement of Hamakom when visiting an aveil, what if an aveil craves silence? Mere presence and no noise might be the only comfort that has any real ...
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Does a mourner sit in a low chair outside the house?

A mourner, during the first 7 days sits on a low chair. The mourner also generally does not leave the house. One exception would be if there is no minyan that can be set up in the mourner's house, so ...
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Is there a “pre-aninut” status?

This is a question of 2 different possible statuses, each with its own implications. In Maurice Lamm's "The Jewish Way in Death and Mourning," he writes (page 26) He is not considered an ...
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Can one go from being an Aveil to being an Onein?

A person is an onein while taking care of arrangements for a burial, and, from what I have learned, if that person's work is finished and that person leaves the body or the body leaves the person for ...
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Aninut and food

After the death of a close relative and before the burial (or the cessation of involvement with the body) one is in a stage of Aninut. During that time, one is exempted (or even forbidden) from many ...
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Shiva for an estranged parent?

Suppose someone has parents who are divorced. That someone is close with one parent, but has absolutely no relationship with the other. Must he sit shiva for the estranged parent? Is there any ...
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Not consoling mourners during shiva?

We read in pirkei avos (4:18) the following: רַבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן בֶּן אֶלְעָזָר אוֹמֵר, אַל תְּרַצֶּה אֶת חֲבֵרְךָ בִשְׁעַת כַּעֲסוֹ, וְאַל תְּנַחֲמֶנּוּ בְּשָׁעָה שֶׁמֵּתוֹ מֻטָּל לְפָנָיו, וְאַל ...
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Is *HaMakom Yenachem* said Friday night in synagogue when the body's not yet buried?

If there are mourners in shul Friday night, they are greeting with HaMakom Yenachem Eschem etc. What if a relative died on Friday afternoon, but there's not enough time to bury before shabbos -- ...
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During Shivah must the mourner always sit on a low stool?

During the Shivah period, does one have to sit on a low stool all of the time or only when visitors are present?
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Why read about Rashb"i's death at a memorial ceremony?

Why do many people read the passage (known as אדרא זוטא) from Zohar about the death of Rabbi Shim'on ben Yochai at memorial ceremonies? A description of it can be found here.
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Why was King David allowed to mourn on the floor?

I heard from my rav that one of the laws of a king is that during mourning, he is not allowed to sit on the floor. Rather he sits on a couch, so as not shame his status as the king. If this is true, ...
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Placing stones on a grave

My office is situated right next to a Jewish cemetery. A coworker, noticing the yarmulke on my head, asked me why he sometimes sees stones placed on some of the gravestones. I told him that as far as ...
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To say Kaddish if known the person has gone to Gan Eden

This story https://www.theyeshivaworld.com/news/headlines-breaking-stories/1819358/tzaddik-of-bnei-brak-appears-in-dream-to-fellow-kovno-ghetto-survivor-im-already-in-gan-eden.html Got me thinking ...
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Not to learn parts of Torah until they become applicable

I was told that one should not learn the laws of Nidda (I guess including orach Chaim 240 and even hoezer 25) until engaged, and not the laws of mourning until applicable (lo alainu) Is this true? Or ...
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Learning laws of aveilut when your parents are alive?

Is it appropriate to learn the laws of aveilut when both your parents are alive? Or is there a superstition that it could be dangerous to them?
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Is Tachanun recited in shul when a chattan and an avel are both present?

If a chattan (groom) is present in shul during the week after marriage, the entire minyan does not say Tachanun. However, if an aveil (mourner) is present in shul during his week of shiva, the ...
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Bikkurim 2:2 vs. Maaser Sheini 5:10

Bikkurim 2:2: יֵשׁ בְּמַעֲשֵׂר וּבִכּוּרִים מַה שֶּׁאֵין כֵּן בַּתְּרוּמָה, שֶׁהַמַּעֲשֵׂר וְהַבִּכּוּרִים טְעוּנִים הֲבָאַת מָקוֹם, וּטְעוּנִים וִדּוּי, וַאֲסוּרִין לָאוֹנֵן. רַבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן ...
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Why do mourners study Mishnah Kelim, Ch. 24 and Mikvaos, Ch. 7?

Mourners traditionally study two chapters of the Mishnah, these two chapters being Kelim Ch. 24 and Mikvaos Ch. 7. Besides these sections having to do with ritual purity, what is the underlying ...
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How can the mourner remarry within one month, if he has to wait two regalim?

Moed katan (21b): מתה אשתו ונשא אשה אחרת — אינו רשאי ליכנס לביתו לדבר עמו ]תנחומין, [כדי שלא לפגוע באשה החדשה. If it was the mourner’s wife who died and he married another woman within thirty ...
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Giving Gift to Mourning Spouse?

Although the Rema (YD 385:3) writes ואסור לשלוח מנות לאבל על אביו ואמו כל י"ב חדש - It is forbidden to send [or bring] gifts to one who is in mourning for his father or mother, throughout the ...
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Mourning for only certain relatives?

After learning the Rambam (Mourning 1:10) וְכֵן הָאֶפִּיקוֹרוֹסִין [וְהַמּוּמָרִים] וְהַמּוֹסְרִין כָּל אֵלּוּ אֵין מִתְאַבְּלִין עֲלֵיהֶן it seems that we don't mourn for these categories of ...
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Why doesn't our decrease of joy extend beyond Tish'a B'Av?

Citing from here There is a famous Mishnah that is cited towards the end of Masechet Ta’anit (4:6) that states: “Mishenichnas Av, Mema’atin Besimcha” “When the month of Av arrives, we ...
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Is one allowed to attend a wake for a Jew?

As far as I understand, Jews are not allowed to have a wake for a Jewish person. But, let's say for some reason, they do it, anyway. Is a Jew allowed to attend this event if s/he doesn't view the ...
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Leftover food from a Shiva house

slightly related to this question: according to the tradition that one should not take food from a Shiva home to eat elsewhere outside the home; does this include taking food after the shiva period ...
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Why does leading the Amud alleviate suffering for the deceased?

A question was asked here on the forum for clarification on the Chiyuv for an Avel to pray for the Amud. And in an answer that was given, the answerer provided a quote from Rabbi Neustadt: "...for ...
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What does it mean for a mourner to “have a chiuv”?

I have noticed that in many synagogues, before davening, the gabbai customarily asks if anybody "has a chiuv". If there is anybody with a chiuv, he is asked to daven from the amud. The people who ...
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Eating an Egg Whole

Is there a basis for this custom that one may not bite into an egg which is still whole, but must be first cut or broken in two, unless it's a time of mourning (aveilut) and only then the egg is ...
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May one do the Mitzvah of Nichum Aveilim/Consoling Mourners on Tish'a B'av?

Based on On Tish'a B'Av,can someone say the typical "Mourner's statement" to any/everyone else?, may one perform the mitzvah of Nichum Aveilim for one who is sitting shiv'a on ...
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On Tish'a B'Av,can someone say the typical “Mourner's statement” to any/everyone else?

Upon leaving a mourner (when one visits him / her during shiva), one says: המקום ינחם אתכם בתוך שאר אבילי ציון וירושלים "May G-d comfort you among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem" Since during ...
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Do mourners change their seats in shul today?

The g'mara on Moed Katan 23a says that after shiva, when the mourner stays at home, he can return to shul but does not sit in his usual seat. (According to this g'mara, he returns to his usual seat a ...
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Is tachanun omitted if the mourner in Shiva isn't part of the minyan?

I was at a shiva minyan this morning but the mourner was not there (he was running late from the airport and some people could not wait). He showed up in the middle and went in to another room, then ...
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What defines a “mourner's home” (bet aveil)?

I'm asking this as a follow-up to this question. Certain prayers such as tachanun are omitted when praying in a mourner's home. OU says that this is true even if the mourners are not present. ...
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How did Rabbi Akiva start again after losing 24,000 students?

Where did Rebbi Akiva find the inspiration to pick himself up and teach students again after losing 24,000 students?
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What halachos of mourning apply to a grandchild for his grandparent's death?

What halachos of mourning, if any, apply to a grandchild upon his or her grandparent's death? Do they tear keri'ah upon hearing of the grandparent's death? Do they sit shivah?

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