Questions tagged [mourning-aveilus]

A halachic period of mourning after the passing of a close relative. There are many laws and customs relating to this period and those observing it.

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Why do mourners study Mishnah Kelim, Ch. 24 and Mikvaos, Ch. 7?

Mourners traditionally study two chapters of the Mishnah, these two chapters being Kelim Ch. 24 and Mikvaos Ch. 7. Besides these sections having to do with ritual purity, what is the underlying ...
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How can the mourner remarry within one month, if he has to wait two regalim?

Moed katan (21b): מתה אשתו ונשא אשה אחרת — אינו רשאי ליכנס לביתו לדבר עמו ]תנחומין, [כדי שלא לפגוע באשה החדשה. If it was the mourner’s wife who died and he married another woman within thirty ...
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Giving Gift to Mourning Spouse?

Although the Rema (YD 385:3) writes ואסור לשלוח מנות לאבל על אביו ואמו כל י"ב חדש - It is forbidden to send [or bring] gifts to one who is in mourning for his father or mother, throughout the ...
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Mourning for only certain relatives?

After learning the Rambam (Mourning 1:10) וְכֵן הָאֶפִּיקוֹרוֹסִין [וְהַמּוּמָרִים] וְהַמּוֹסְרִין כָּל אֵלּוּ אֵין מִתְאַבְּלִין עֲלֵיהֶן it seems that we don't mourn for these categories of ...
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Do we double mourning and kriah? [duplicate]

There are two separate situations of mourning that (according to many opinions) require the tearing of a garment on the left side -- seeing the Kotel (or an ancient city in Judea) and the passing of a ...
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Why does leading the Amud alleviate suffering for the deceased?

A question was asked here on the forum for clarification on the Chiyuv for an Avel to pray for the Amud. And in an answer that was given, the answerer provided a quote from Rabbi Neustadt: "...for ...
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Eating an Egg Whole

Is there a basis for this custom that one may not bite into an egg which is still whole, but must be first cut or broken in two, unless it's a time of mourning (aveilut) and only then the egg is ...
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Why was King David allowed to mourn on the floor?

I heard from my rav that one of the laws of a king is that during mourning, he is not allowed to sit on the floor. Rather he sits on a couch, so as not shame his status as the king. If this is true, ...
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May one do the Mitzvah of Nichum Aveilim/Consoling Mourners on Tish'a B'av?

Based on On Tish'a B'Av,can someone say the typical "Mourner's statement" to any/everyone else?, may one perform the mitzvah of Nichum Aveilim for one who is sitting shiv'a on ...
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An “Aveil” at Shabbat Mincha

An aveil (mourner) does not practice public aveilut (mourning) on Shabbat (Ketubot 4a), though he is still in aveilut and there is some impact on what he can and can't do. Would the presence of an ...
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What defines a “mourner's home” (bet aveil)?

I'm asking this as a follow-up to this question. Certain prayers such as tachanun are omitted when praying in a mourner's home. OU says that this is true even if the mourners are not present. ...
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Is tachanun omitted if the mourner in Shiva isn't part of the minyan?

I was at a shiva minyan this morning but the mourner was not there (he was running late from the airport and some people could not wait). He showed up in the middle and went in to another room, then ...
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How did Rabbi Akiva start again after losing 24,000 students?

Where did Rebbi Akiva find the inspiration to pick himself up and teach students again after losing 24,000 students?
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Which mourning laws does an Ashkenazi son follow after his Sefardi mother's death?

An Ashkenazi son (his father was a Yekke) who mourns after his Sefardi mother - does he follow Ashkenazi Minhagim of Avelut (Kaddish for 11 months exactly for example) of Sefardi?
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What halachos of mourning apply to a grandchild for his grandparent's death?

What halachos of mourning, if any, apply to a grandchild upon his or her grandparent's death? Do they tear keri'ah upon hearing of the grandparent's death? Do they sit shivah?
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Breaking an Omer restriction

In a hypothetical case, I have chosen to observe the restrictions of the Omer during the "first half." But then, I am placed in a situation at which happy live music is being played. Does my presence ...
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God's Nichum Aveilim

Asking for a friend: On Kiddushin 38a, Tosfos s.v. Tzei, explain that Hashem didn't approach Yehoshua until after the 30 days of mourning for Moshe had elapsed, since the Shechinah does not descend ...
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Kaddish for children

I heard some rabbanim say that if a baby or child is over the age of 30 days, one should say kaddish for him for a year (11 months) while I have heard others say that 11 months is only for a parent ...
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Yahrzeit plaque in shul for cremated relatives

Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh Deah) 345:5 states: Those who deviate from the ways of the community, i.e. people who have thrown off the responsibility of mitzvoth from their shoulders, and are not included in ...
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How to comfort someone who has lost his non-Jewish parent

I came across a (Facebook) post the other day in which an acquaintance announced he had lost his non-Jewish father. The individual is not a convert; his mother had intermarried. The funeral will not ...
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To say Kaddish at the cemetery after burial, do the mourners count as part of the minyan?

I understand that onenim cannot be counted as part of the minyan. Thus, at the cemetery, when saying the Kaddish can they be counted as part of the minyan or do we need 10 others besides them?
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Kaddish not being said correctly

Should one respond to a Kaddish that a mourner is not pronouncing the words properly? I don’t know if this question has been asked before, but I found something similar - Is there such a thing as a ...
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Should tachanun be said in a mourner's shtiebl?

Many shtiebls are set up as shuls that are part of someone's home. This raises the question as to what is considered a "mourner's home" with regard to saying tachanun. Background: Tachanun is not ...
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Mourning the death of an infant

If an infant only survives for one day Rachmana litzlan, do the parents have to sit shiva or say kaddish?
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Preparing a grave before death

Is it against Halacha to prepare a grave before someone who passed away i.e. that the doctors and family know that the person is going to pass away but don’t know when so they make preparations. ...
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Mourners by Kabbalat Shabbat

Is there a source that says that someone has to be with a mourner at all times from when he is asked to leave the shul before Lechu Neranena. As I understand the shamash/ warden asks him to leave and ...
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How Avelut is healing, according to Rambam?

The Rambam in Moreh Nevuchim (Chelek 3 Chapter 41) explains that mourning a deceased relative actually heals the great pain an Avel may have: " For mourners find comfort in crying and in excitement ...
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Heter to call a mourner to the Torah on a weekday in the first week of his aveilus

A mourner in the first week of his aveilus was unable to pray at home and went to synagogue on a weekday where he was the only Kohen (or Levi). Normally a mourner does not get called up to the Torah....
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Are Tzitzis obligated in Tzitzis

According to the Rosh (Moed Katan 3:43), a garment worn solely to absorb sweat is not considered a בגד (with regard to the obligation of מצות קריעה - mournful rending). This principle is invoked by ...
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Avelut: Bereavement in Judaism - Where does the word come from

Bereavement in Judaism is often called "Avelut" or in singular form: "Avel". (Hebrew: אֲבֵלוּת). What does this word literally mean? WHere does it come from?
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Welcoming the Mourner in on Friday Night

On Friday night, a mourner, during the first 7 days, a mourner enters shul right before the recitation of Psalm 92 (Mizmor shir l'yom hashabbat). A mourner enters the synagogue on Friday evening ...
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Why doesn't our decrease of joy extend beyond Tish'a B'Av?

Citing from here There is a famous Mishnah that is cited towards the end of Masechet Ta’anit (4:6) that states: “Mishenichnas Av, Mema’atin Besimcha” “When the month of Av arrives, we ...
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Would an avel who visits the Kotel need to do an extra tearing?

In the back of a siddur, I saw one of the halachot state that one who has not visited the Kotel ("Western Wall" in Jerusalem) within 30 days should tear his clothes when he comes to the Kotel. Let's ...
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Tefillin at chatzos on Tisha BAv

The general practice is to not wear tefillin in the morning on Tisha BAv (OC 555:1). However, after chatzos many of the mourning practices which are only customs are lifted. As such, people wear ...
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Source that Tisha B'av is the day of mourning for all tragedies, even if they did not fall out then?

I have heard (in the context of when Jews should mourn for those lost in the Holocaust), that Tish'a B'av is the day on which we mourn all tragedies, even those that did not occur on that day. What ...
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What sad/terrible events actually took place on the 9th of Av?

I have heard that Tish'a B'av is a date on which many bad things happened to the Jewish people, and that is why we mourn on that day. What are they? (Sources please...)
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Why sprinkle on the third day?

Parshat Chukat describes the purifying ritual of the red heifer and records that one is impure for 7 days, but the process requires that one sprinkle on the third and seventh day. Aside from one ...
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Is one allowed to attend a wake for a Jew?

As far as I understand, Jews are not allowed to have a wake for a Jewish person. But, let's say for some reason, they do it, anyway. Is a Jew allowed to attend this event if s/he doesn't view the ...
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Switching back to a seat in Aveilut

There is a practice for a mourner to change his seat in Shul -- there are many different opinions about when and how. If, during the period of mourning, the mourner suffers another loss, so he ...
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Buying Second Hand Clothing in aveilut

During Shloshim (and 12 months in the case of a death of a parent) one should not buy (though some specify "wear") "new" clothing (according to the summary of laws I have from my rabbi). Does this ...
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Is an Onein Patur from EVERY positive mitzvah?

After the death of a close relative, a person enters the state of aninut, during which he is exempt from a variety of mitzvot. It seems (from the limited write ups which I have read) that this ...
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Hava Amina for Kohen not becoming impure for father

The Midrash questions why the Torah has to specify that a Kohen becomes impure both for his deceased father and deceased mother. Why not just write his mother? It says: [ד] יאמר "לאמו", מה תלמוד ...
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Why is a bereaved person not even allowed to make a short blessing over his food?

The condition of the “onen” (a bereaved person whose close relative who has not yet been buried) and the laws are described here. There it says: Because of the need to make and conclude the ...
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Brother saying kaddish after sheloshim

A sibling who passed away without having children but his brother takes the responsibility to say Kaddish for the eleven months. Is the brother allowed to lead prayers from the amud if he is acting ...
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Is alav ha-shalom (A“H) used often, or do most use zikhrono livrakha (Z”L) when referring to the deceased?

I understand that A"H is translates to "may he/she rest in peace," which is indeed closer to what non-Jews say in gentile societies. However, I also understand Z"L is also an honorific for the dead, ...
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Dating when parent died

What are the laws/customs of dating/shiddichim during the first 30 days or the first year after a parent died? What if it happened to the one you are(or want to) date/ing?
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When does the Sheloshim period start?

Does the Sheloshim period start from the passing? the interment? the beginning of the shiva? If it starts from the shiva is that only if the interment already took place?
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May stones left on graves be decorated?

Like many Jews I have the minhag of placing small stones on Jewish graves I visit. (The precise roots and meaning of this custom have many explanations, but it is widespread and I am not questioning ...
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Eating olives at the house of a mourner

Eating olives at the house of a mourner is a custom among Sephardim. I think it is specifically a Morroccan custom. Is there a source or reason for this?
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is it possible to do the Kri'ah at the moment of the death, and not at the funeral? [duplicate]

is it possible to do the Kri'ah at the exact moment of the death, and not only at the funeral?