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Questions tagged [marriage]

marriage, marrying, the state of being married; more specific tags are `wedding` and `intermarriage`

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74 votes
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What is the halachic source for objection to gay (civil) marriage?

New York State is considering legalizing gay (civil) marriages, so tonight on our answering machine we received a message urging us to pray that it doesn't pass because gay civil marriages were, you ...
Joel Spolsky's user avatar
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50 votes
8 answers
5k views

What is the point of having a rapist marry the woman he raped?

Deuteronomy 22:28-29 (JPS) 28  If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, that is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found; 29 then the man that lay with ...
El'endia Starman's user avatar
40 votes
3 answers
12k views

Questions about Polygamy in Jewish Law and Culture

I've recently been studying polygamy (having more than 1 wife), and had a few cultural questions. Was polygamy accepted at the time of David and Solomon? Were there any laws about it? Was polygamy ...
stringo0's user avatar
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31 votes
5 answers
11k views

Taking a concubine (pilegesh) today

Moderator's note: As with all discussions of Jewish law on this site, any information included in this question or its answers is presented only for the purpose of understanding the relevant ideas, ...
user avatar
25 votes
4 answers
2k views

Saying "I love you" during nidda

While a woman is nidda and she and her husband are observing harchakot, is it permitted for them to tell each other, "I love you," or is that too suggestive of a statement for the nidda period?
Daniel's user avatar
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24 votes
3 answers
5k views

May my wife wear my jacket to keep warm?

The Sefer HaChinuch #564 writes that it’s forbidden for a woman to wear men’s clothing. If it’s cold outside, is a woman allowed to wear a man’s coat to keep warm? If #1 is a problem, are any ...
Gavriel's user avatar
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22 votes
2 answers
4k views

What happens to the family of a Kohen today if his wife is a victim of rape?

What happens to the family of a Kohen today if his wife is a victim of rape? What are the steps taken and how does this come to be resolved according to halachah and in the most constructive way for ...
seekingclarity's user avatar
22 votes
4 answers
855 views

If a woman had more than one husband, to which would she be united at the Resurrection?

Ezra Stiles was a Congregationalist minister in Newport, Rhode Island in the late 18th century. He was a frequent visitor to the Newport Synagogue and there met Rabbi Raphael Hayyim Issac Carregal, a ...
Bruce James's user avatar
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21 votes
5 answers
2k views

Gezeira of Rabbeinu Gershom text

Does anyone know where I can find the actual text of the Gezeira of Rabbeinu Gershom? It keeps popping up in my learning, but only as being referenced, I would like to read that actual text.
Rabbi Michael Tzadok's user avatar
20 votes
11 answers
2k views

Yaakov Marrying Two Sisters [duplicate]

According to those that say the Avos kept the Torah beforehand (here), how was Yaakov allowed to marry two sisters? (Yes, I'm aware that there are many answers)
yydl's user avatar
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20 votes
2 answers
14k views

Apologetics for marriage at 3 years old

Are there contemporary apologetics for the Mishnah (Niddah 44b) that a girl of the age of 3 can be married by sexual relations? (It seems difficult to accept that such a thing is even allowed in ...
Curiouser's user avatar
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20 votes
3 answers
4k views

Aside from the days set aside for impurity, what exactly is a man allowed to do with his wife in regards to intimacy? [closed]

A man cannot touch, stare, kiss or have relations with a woman he is not married with. On the days when the laws of impurity do not apply, what exactly can a man do with his wife? Assuming extra ...
Ani Yodea's user avatar
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19 votes
2 answers
4k views

Can you see your wife unclothed?

I think someone in another question here (or on another site?) said he was told by his "chassan teacher" not to look at his wife unclothed. It seems like this is not the real halacha to me, or at ...
Desert Star's user avatar
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19 votes
4 answers
854 views

Was it ever the norm for children to get married?

The Gemara describes many Halachos that apply when someone gets married at very young ages, many under 12, and even a few for the age of 3. There are stories of people who did get married at such ages ...
HodofHod's user avatar
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18 votes
3 answers
740 views

Why did Achashveirosh take Esther if she was already married?

According to the opinion that Queen Esther was married to Mordechai. Achashveirosh was looking for unmarried girls (Esther 2:2–4). Why did he take a married woman? Especially considering that Queen ...
Am Haaretz Gamur Mideoraysa's user avatar
17 votes
2 answers
3k views

Can a Cohen marry a bat niddah?

Can a Cohen marry a bat niddah? Are Cohens generally restricted from marrying baalot teshuva because of the possibility that they may be b'not niddah?
SAH's user avatar
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17 votes
4 answers
3k views

Would a baalat teshuva need a get from each previous sexual relationship?

Would a baalat teshuva need a get from each previous sexual relationship? In light of the idea that marriage can be contracted solely through bi'ah/public knowledge of the couple's relationship (as ...
SAH's user avatar
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17 votes
4 answers
8k views

Minhag of married women shaving during marriage

The custom for married women to shave their heads is, evidently, a fairly widespread custom that exists at least amongst (certain) Hasidim. I have heard a variety of supposed, non-authoritative ...
The Lone Scribe of Volozhyn's user avatar
17 votes
4 answers
558 views

Promised to name son Shimon - now husband is Shimon?

A woman who desperately wanted to get married traveled to Meron, the burial place of Rebbi Shimon bar Yochai, and vowed that if she found her match, she would name her first son Shimon in his merit. ...
sam's user avatar
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17 votes
2 answers
1k views

What's the leading medical explanation for the "woman whose husbands keep dying" ("katlanit") phenomenon?

The Gemara says that if a woman gets married, then her husband dies; then marries another guy and is widowed from him; then once more; we then assume something about her is causing her husbands to die ...
Shalom's user avatar
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17 votes
1 answer
908 views

Is it ok for spouses to touch in public?

Are spouses allowed to touch one another in public (when the wife is not a niddah) or is this a violation of tzniut? I am asking specifically regarding touch that is not in any way sexual or even ...
user avatar
17 votes
1 answer
684 views

How does the kohein gadol's substitute wife work?

The first mishna of Yoma1 explains that before Yom Kippur, a substitute wife is prepared for the kohein gadol lest his wife die -- because the torah says he makes atonement for himself and "his house",...
Monica Cellio's user avatar
16 votes
7 answers
5k views

40 Days Before Conception

It is written somewhere (I don't remember exactly where) that 40 days before conception, it is called out in Heaven who that person will marry. However, if the person gets married multiple times how ...
yydl's user avatar
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16 votes
6 answers
1k views

Leah: Isn't it enough that you took away my husband?

I have never had any understanding of this statement by Leah to Rachel: "Isn't it enough that you took away my husband?" in parsha vayetze. The obvious truth seems to be the opposite: after ...
ray's user avatar
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16 votes
4 answers
2k views

Who was Cain's wife?

I saw this problem on reddit today and I think that we cursorily covered this in Tanach class. Who was Cain's wife? In בראשית ד' י"ז it says " וַיֵּדַע קַיִן אֶת-אִשְׁתּוֹ" but it never says who she ...
doomrobo's user avatar
  • 163
16 votes
3 answers
2k views

Talis Gadol for Unmarried Individuals

In my minhag (and I believe it's minhag Ashkenaz), unmarried men do not wear a Talis Gadol (only a Talis Katan). Why is this so?
yydl's user avatar
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16 votes
3 answers
2k views

Can someone have more than one potential soulmate simultaneously?

I have been told from several different people that it is possible for one person to have multiple Besherts (divinely intended marriage partners, soulmates if you will) to choose from. He may only ...
Menachem's user avatar
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16 votes
4 answers
1k views

Marital Prenups

In 1993 Rabbi Mordechai Willig, a Rosh Yeshiva at YU and a member of the Beth Din of America, drafted a prenup for use at Jewish weddings to avoid future Aguna/Mesorevet Get problems. The agreement ...
Double AA's user avatar
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16 votes
1 answer
2k views

Would a widower observe Yahrzeit after remarriage?

If a Jewish man's wife died, he would naturally observe the Yahrzeit on the anniversary of her death. Would he continue to do so if he remarried? My question comes from reading about the Yahrezeit ...
Frank Luke's user avatar
15 votes
2 answers
2k views

Rape for a girl and is looking to get married

If a young Jewish girl was raped, what are the protocols for her getting married? Is there anyone that she can't marry other than the Kohen or Kohen Gadol? What are the halachot for these types of ...
Anz12's user avatar
  • 307
15 votes
3 answers
4k views

If a woman cannot have children, can she marry?

I've been doing some research, and I found a lot of references to the rule that if a marriage lasts 10 years and does not produce any children, the couple must divorce and remarry in a new attempt to ...
Seeker's user avatar
  • 153
15 votes
1 answer
554 views

Riddle: when would a couple be forced to break their engagement? [closed]

Riddle: Chaim and Shprintza got engaged. They, their entire families, and their rabbis were all totally happy about the engagement. They didn't hide any information from one another. Chaim and ...
Shalom's user avatar
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15 votes
2 answers
2k views

Why is hair sometimes considered *erva* (nakedness) but sometimes not?

Why do people say that the hair of a married woman is considered as nakedness, but not the hair of a single woman? Isn't hair just hair? What if a man grew his hair long - would it also be ...
Adam Mosheh's user avatar
  • 6,029
14 votes
4 answers
2k views

Getting married in age order

Those that refrain from allowing a younger sibling to get married prior to an older sibling mention the verse from Lavan, "Lo Yaiose Kain BimiKomeinu Losais Hatziyira Lifnei HaBechira, In our locale ...
Gershon Gold's user avatar
14 votes
2 answers
3k views

Can the husband in a gentile married couple convert without his wife?

We are a gentile married couple and my husband wants to convert to Orthodox and I'm still not sure if I want to convert at all. I found out that the Conservative would let my husband convert and stay ...
tiger's user avatar
  • 141
14 votes
4 answers
2k views

What is the source for the Kallah's circling the Chasan 7 times?

What is the source for a Kallah (bride) to circle her Chasan (bridegroom) seven times at their wedding?
Gershon Gold's user avatar
14 votes
2 answers
877 views

Called to the Torah before wedding

I recently received an invitation to a friends wedding and I noticed that it said he would be "Called to the Torah" with a date and time approximately 1 week before the wedding. I am not Jewish, so ...
going's user avatar
  • 1,086
14 votes
4 answers
1k views

Why should one have marital relations as if forced by a demon?

The gemarah (nedarim 20b) mentions that one of the reasons for having beautiful children is due to having relations "as if forced by a demon". Rashi there explains the term as either indicating that ...
user avatar
14 votes
2 answers
787 views

Why did Avraham prefer the daughters of Aner, Eshkol and Mamre over Eliezer's daughter?

Rashi on Bereishis 24:39 says that Abraham said to [Eliezer] “My son is blessed, and you are cursed [Eliezer was a descendant of Canaan who had been cursed by Noah], and an accursed one cannot ...
Binyomin Trager's user avatar
14 votes
1 answer
2k views

If a Jewish couple is married through a civil ceremony alone, do Jewish marriage laws apply to them thereafter?

If a Jewish couple is married through a civil ceremony alone, do Jewish marriage laws apply to them thereafter? Assume no ketubah; perhaps a ring, but not necessarily 2 witnesses. Could one say that ...
SAH's user avatar
  • 20k
14 votes
1 answer
619 views

Does someone who dies very young have a soulmate?

As discussed in this question, the Talmud tells us that 40 days before someone is born, a heavenly voice calls out "This person is destined for so-and-so". Not sure if anyone can answer this, but I'...
Barry Hammer's user avatar
  • 1,906
13 votes
4 answers
1k views

What's an elegant way to avoid social contact with untzinius or attractive women?

There's times when women I'm attracted to visit our home or are friends of my wife and I don't feel comfortable completely ignoring them or telling my wife to not invite them. I'm not sure how my wife ...
AkivaK's user avatar
  • 131
13 votes
4 answers
5k views

Wife not wearing wedding ring after marrriage

May a Jewish Orthodox wife stop wearing her wedding ring after marriage? Can she specify that she will not wear it untill she has children?
Martin's user avatar
  • 131
13 votes
8 answers
3k views

Marrying a wife that is older than you?

What example is there in the Torah about (lichatchila i.e a priori according to halacha) marrying a wife that is years older than you?
hazoriz's user avatar
  • 7,546
13 votes
5 answers
21k views

Is a rabbi required to be married?

I have heard (I honestly cannot remember where...) that to be a rabbi a man must be married. Is there any truth to this? I am more interested in knowing if this was true in the first century C.E. ...
Cos Callis's user avatar
13 votes
3 answers
3k views

Can a Kohen Marry a Woman with a Non-Jewish Father?

Is a Kohen allowed to marry a woman who is the daughter of a Jewish woman and non-Jewish man?
cookie monster's user avatar
13 votes
2 answers
1k views

Non-Jew's marriage obligation

Does a non-Jew have an obligation to get married like the Jew does?
my rebbi's talmid's user avatar
13 votes
1 answer
4k views

Prohibition of a Kohen marrying a Zonah

In the prohibition of a Kohen marrying a Zonah (cf. Vayikra 21:7), what defines a woman as a Zonah? Is it just having had relations with a non-Jew, or does it also include having relations out of ...
Binyomin Trager's user avatar
13 votes
2 answers
592 views

Blind and Marriage

The Gemara tells us that a man may not marry a woman without first seeing her because if she turns out to be displeasing to him then he will transgress the mitzvah of "Ve'ahavtah lerei'acha kamocha"(...
Yahu's user avatar
  • 16.1k
13 votes
1 answer
4k views

What is the value of a (Kesuba) marriage contract?

In a regular Kesuba we give total 200 Zekukim Kesef. What is the value of that currently in US dollars? Also do you pay the value when you got married or the value at either death/divorce?
Gershon Gold's user avatar

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