Stack Exchange Network

Stack Exchange network consists of 174 Q&A communities including Stack Overflow, the largest, most trusted online community for developers to learn, share their knowledge, and build their careers.

Visit Stack Exchange
Join us in building a kind, collaborative learning community via our updated Code of Conduct.

Anything and everything related to Judaism's approach to dealing with other human beings.

1
vote
1answer
79 views

Keeping your own community's dinim vs. yuhara

My chosen community--like every community, I suppose--has its own body of distinctive minhagim, horaos, chumras, hiddurim, and normative halachas. All, including the hiddurim, are observed with a high ...
4
votes
1answer
68 views

Can one publicize a poor experience with a service provider to discourage others from using him?

Trigger situation for this question: someone asked for a doctor recommendation on a WhatsApp group with 200+ members. When a particular doctor was mentioned, one of the members wrote he had a bad ...
-1
votes
3answers
166 views

Is treating others decently more important than keeping Shabbos?

Two questions: According to Jewish philosophy which is more important in Judaism, keeping Shabbos, or treating others decently? According to Jewish practical law, which is more important?
6
votes
2answers
112 views

How to respond to an insincere apology

If someone apologizes to you for wronging you, but you either suspect or believe that their apology is insincere, what should/must/may you do in response? Some subquestions: Is saying you forgive ...
1
vote
0answers
68 views

Is Revenge permitted if doing it for the good of the person

i understand it is forbidden to take revenge (which seems to me to mean: to exact punishment for something bad done to you so that it will not be done again) but how does that fit with not forgiving ...
1
vote
1answer
71 views

Should you prompt someone to ask you for mechila before Yom Kippur?

If G0d forbid you have a grudge against someone (and you did not rebuke them [enough] at the time--your fault) must you/should you tell them about it before Yom Kippur so they know to ask you for ...
0
votes
1answer
323 views

When to say Baruch Dayan Emes

This link suggests it is appropriate to say "Baruch Dayan Emes" (presumably without H''s name) even if you didn't know the person. But what if the person passed away a long time ago, and it is only ...
1
vote
0answers
45 views

minimum honoring others

chazal tell us 24,000 students of Rabbi Akiva were wiped out in a plague due to not giving honor to each other. (Yevamot 62b) אמרו שנים עשר אלף זוגים תלמידים היו לו לרבי עקיבא מגבת עד אנטיפרס וכולן ...
29
votes
4answers
5k views

Does Judaism consider women inferior?

According to Orthodox Judaism, women may not be rabbis, be counted as part of a minyan, leyn from the Torah, or study the Talmud. (It even says that to teach a woman Torah is to teach her obscenity!) ...
4
votes
2answers
232 views

Praying for other people

Is it proper in Judaism to pray for someone, even if they do not ask you to pray for them? Similarly, is asking someone to pray for you acceptable in Judaism? Usually, Christians ask each other to ...
0
votes
2answers
182 views

Title to use when addressing a rav

When speaking to the rav of a community, what title should one use? "Hello, Rabbi X" would surely be acceptable for someone with regular semicha, but perhaps not for a person who is referred to as "...
2
votes
1answer
78 views

Rebuking someone for an old wrongdoing

Let's say someone did something wrong in the past--either an aveira or something that was personally harmful. Should you/must you rebuke them for their old mistake ...if you bear a grudge against ...
2
votes
1answer
89 views

Rebuking someone for something that is not an aveira

Many sources suggest we rebuke so as not to bear a grudge (lo titor). But the Midrash and several meforshim (discussed here) suggest that the main purpose of rebuke is to keep one's fellow, and ...
5
votes
2answers
356 views

How to start loving someone after they become Jewish

A certain acquaintance of mine had bad middos and I didn't like her. Then she converted to Judaism. Nothing has changed: she still has bad middos; I still don't like her. But everything has changed. ...
0
votes
1answer
55 views

Is Offending Jews forbidden?

I heard that it is forbidden to offend Jews Is this true? And until what level, (how much should we need to know what offends people (it is in their head))? If yes, Is it forbidden to ...
2
votes
3answers
3k views

What to say to someone on a yahrzeit

Is there a standard expression used to greet or comfort those who are celebrating an anniversary of mourning? (...and why is it said?) Even if not, what should one say? (...and why?) We should merit ...
0
votes
4answers
125 views

If I hate myself, how can I love my fellow Jew like I love myself?

How can I love my fellow Jew as myself if I hate myself? How do I fulfill veavta lerayacha komocha in such a case?
7
votes
1answer
95 views

Does one violate the Torah prohibition of tormenting a widow if she has remarried?

Does one violate the Torah prohibition (Ex. 22:21) of tormenting a widow if she has remarried? You may be inclined to say that the purpose of the Mitzvah is because she's defenseless and the Torah ...
-1
votes
2answers
63 views

בין אדם לחבירו - between man and his fellow man

The translation of בין אדם לחבירו is between man and his fellow man. 1) Does בין אדם לחבירו also apply to women? 2) If it does, then shouldn't it be worded בין אשה לחבירה or בין אשה לחברתה?
0
votes
1answer
148 views

Difference between judgement and discernment in Torah thought

Pirkei Avos (2:5) tells us 'Don't judge your friend until you are in his situation'. I was wondering about the term 'judge' Merriam-Webster online defines:- 'judgement' as 'the process of forming ...
3
votes
0answers
46 views

Why is Ona'as Devarim not in Hilchos De'os?

The Rambam places most of the laws regarding social, interpersonal relationships (such as the prohibition against slander) in Hilchos De'os, but he seems to be missing an important one: ona'as devarim,...
8
votes
2answers
451 views

Emotional distress with the overly sensitive

From the website dinonline: The Torah teaches: “When you sell something to your fellow, or buy from your fellow, do no wrong one man his fellow” (Vayikra 25:14). In a subsequent verse, the ...
10
votes
4answers
251 views

Minimum Requirement of Love your Neighbor

What is the minimum requirement to not be transgressing the mitzva of "ואהבת לריעך כמוך" "love your fellow as yourself" (Lev. 19:18)? For example, must one actively try to love others or it is enough ...
3
votes
3answers
265 views

Public Shaming: Cardinal Sin?

Is publicly shaming someone a cardinal sin (a sin which one must die rather than perform), as per the Talmudic statement that it is better to die than to publicly shame someone (Berakhot (43b), Bava ...
9
votes
1answer
80 views

Scrutinising the legitimacy/cause of a charity collector

In many synagogues that I frequent charity collectors come round collecting money for themselves, families or other causes. They often have a certificate declaring the legitimacy of their cause (...
12
votes
3answers
3k views

How to explain to friends/family that one will not attend an intermarriage

Suppose a friend or family member becomes engaged to a non-Jew. For the sake of this question, also assume that a trusted rabbi has been consulted and he has ruled (after considering any relevant ...
11
votes
1answer
159 views

Do you have to consider neighbors when building a shul?

Are there any halachic obligations to consider the averse effects that building a shul may have on Jewish neighbors? This may include things like lowering property value, noise and other disturbances, ...
5
votes
1answer
52 views

If someone didn't appease their fellow, what do they say in Ashamnu?

The standardized "Ashamnu" viduy has in it several sins which are between one person and another, for example stealing or giving bad advice. If someone hasn't asked forgiveness from the victim, does ...
3
votes
1answer
121 views

when is shushing in a shul permited, when forbiden and when obligated

In my shul there is someone who shushes people that talk. He believes that he is obligated to do this. I understand that there is a prohibition against embarrassing people publicly and that sometimes ...
10
votes
1answer
979 views

Source that those without a genuine need soliciting charity is a good thing

Judaism 101 says (and I have heard it many times): Judaism acknowledges that many people who ask for charity have no genuine need. In fact, the Talmud suggests that this is a good thing: if all ...
3
votes
2answers
277 views

Olam Haba depends on how you treat your wife

I have heard in the name of Rabbi Chaim Vital that one's olam haba depends largely on how he treated his wife. anyone know the source (if any) of this statement and what is the logic behind it.
3
votes
0answers
34 views

Lashon Hara about someone you do not know? [duplicate]

Is it considered Lashon Hara if a person speaks badly about a person he does not actually know? And, what about if nobody really knows him? For example, would saying something bad about another user ...
1
vote
1answer
110 views

LOR and sinat chinam or lashon hara

Recently the rav at my local schul made a highly innapropriate remark on Facebook which would be considered lashon hara as well as sinat chinam. As the schul is a shlichut of Chabad (it is the only ...
-3
votes
1answer
217 views

Is this aphorism about gentiles as problematic as it seems? [closed]

I often hear among younger, apparently fromm men the aphorism "[gentile women]1 are for [sexual] practice". This has always struck me as bizarre, due to the importance of the reproductive act for its ...
12
votes
3answers
289 views

embarassing an anonymous person online

There is a prohibition to embarass other people (Sanhedrin 99a). Does this apply also to anonymous online people despite that nobody knows their identity and therefore they should not feel embarassed ...
2
votes
1answer
214 views

A client of yours finally pays a bill — seven months late. Should you thank him?

You're a freelancer. A client of yours finally pays a bill — seven months late! — via email money transfer. Should you send him a thank-you email? Or should you simply be silent? And why?...
4
votes
3answers
236 views

How do I repair a damaged friendship?

I am seeking specifically-Jewish wisdom on the following question. Our rabbis have something to say on just about every aspect of life, but I'm not sure where I should be looking (or even what ...
1
vote
1answer
99 views

Insulting a widow (almana) and apologizing

In short, I'm looking for sources from anywhere that speaks about the severity of insulting an almana and all that surrounds this topic, what the "punishment" might be, what teshuva can be done, etc. ...
4
votes
1answer
113 views

Believing 'evil tongue' during elections

On Tuesday, there are municipal elecions here in Israel, and some of the candidates are accusing their competitors of corruption. I am not in a position to check these accusations — I am neither ...
1
vote
1answer
340 views

Getting a Jew fired from a job that forces them to work on Shabbos?

I have a Jewish friend who wants to become religious, but is currently holding a job that forces her to work on Shabbos morning, and more recently Friday evening as well. She does not have the ...
5
votes
1answer
67 views

Are criminals rehabilitated after punishment?

I ask this without trying to take a position on any current events. If someone is found, under halacha, to be guilty of a crime not punishable by death, and he pays whatever the price is (lashes, ...
6
votes
1answer
223 views

Tshuva concerning sexual sins requires partner's exculpation?

If a person wants to do tshuva of the sexual sins committed, besides stopping the sin and asking G'd forgiveness, should the person also ask sorry to each woman that he had an inappropriate ...
7
votes
2answers
235 views

Newcomers Overwhelmed by Myriad Halachas

Some people, especially Baal Teshuvas who drastically change their lives to being fully observant may find it somewhat overwhelming to observe the minimum halachas in being an orthodox jew (such as ...
11
votes
3answers
311 views

How does Hillel's answer summarize the whole Torah?

In Shabbos 31a, Hillel addresses a potential convert who asks him to summarize the whole Torah, and he says, "What is hateful to you, do not do to others." This is a nice d'var Torah, but it seems to ...
4
votes
1answer
2k views

Source for “Ben Adam Lemakom” and “Ben Adam Lechavero”

Where does the concept of Ben Adam Lemakom and Ben Adam Lechavero come from? I know there is a concept of the first five of the ten commandments being between 'man and his friend' and the second ...
10
votes
5answers
304 views

Rabbi Akiva's 24k students died because of interpersonal issues, but he said Veahavta Lireacha Kamocha is a Klal Gadol?

It strikes me as odd that Rabbi Akiva's 24,000 talmidim died apparently because of interpersonal issues yet he is attributed as having said that veahavta lireacha kamocha is a "klal gadol batorah". I'...
8
votes
1answer
212 views

Saying Baruch Dayan HaEmeth when you don't know the person

Is it appropriate to say "Baruch Dayan HaEmeth" when you hear of sad news about a person you don't know, or a person you have corresponded with but haven't met? Does it make a difference if you've ...
5
votes
1answer
166 views

Is it permissible to embarrass a thief?

Here's a story I witnessed: Someone trying to get his car out of the public parking lot next to his building found his way out blocked by two cars parked right on the ramp out, whose owners went into ...
2
votes
2answers
140 views

The source to be Dan L'Caf Zechut

From where do we know that one must be "dan" someone "l'caf zechut"? (that we must judge someone favorably even though from a certain act it might seem they are doing something?
4
votes
1answer
104 views

What is an outsider's obligation if abuse is suspected?

What obligation does an outsider (non-family member) have if she or he suspects that there is abuse in another family? Does it matter if the abused party denies the allegation? What if the abused ...