When a person gets engaged and married there are various things that we do as a Zecher L'Churban. At the Tenayim (whether done immediately or at the wedding) we break an earthernware plate, at the Chupah we break a glass. Why do we Davka break an earthernware plate at the Tenayim and a glass at the Chupah?

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    Just before the chupah, the chasan has some ashes on his forehead to remember the Bais Hamikdash.
    – geoffc
    Aug 9, 2011 at 16:07
  • I learned this week, that only Ashkenazim do the ash on the head.
    – avi
    Aug 9, 2011 at 20:48
  • @avi That's odd considering it's an explicit gemara (BB60b) quoted by all the major rishonim, shulchan aruch etc.
    – Double AA
    Nov 23, 2011 at 4:30
  • judaism.stackexchange.com/a/18255/5323
    – MTL
    Jul 30, 2015 at 22:24

1 Answer 1


I heard it is because one can "fix" a wedding through a divorce (like a glass that can be melted back together). There is no way out of a tnaim, however, so it is like an earthenware plate that can't be fixed.

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    The Toldos Aharon writes this in the name of the Ba'al Shem Tov. See footnote to #970 in Taamei Minhagim: hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=14556&pgnum=424
    – Menachem
    Aug 12, 2011 at 4:58
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    Can't you also get out of a tnaim with kiddushin then get?
    – Double AA
    Aug 2, 2012 at 15:12
  • @DoubleAA that's not getting out of a Tnayim. One fulfills the Tenaim through marriage and then leave the marriage through a Get Jul 31, 2015 at 0:26
  • @ShmuelBrin What's the difference? In both cases it's no longer binding on you.
    – Double AA
    Jul 31, 2015 at 0:31
  • @DoubleAA If a person vows to get married to someone and divorces her, did he fulfill his Shevua? Jul 31, 2015 at 2:09

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