Do pre-marital relations count as wasted semen after intercourse? What does Halacha say about this situation? It would obviously be a sin but would it count as wasted seed if ejaculation occurred inside and not on the outside?
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4Questions like this are best discussed in private with a competent Orthodox rabbi.– ezraJan 26, 2018 at 5:15
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related: judaism.stackexchange.com/q/44727/16354 the answers there certainly apply to here– רבות מחשבותJan 26, 2018 at 5:16
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@רבות I infer from the two answers there very different answers to this question. One says it's permitted for an "Halachicly recognized purpose", which I assume would exclude premarital relations; the other says it's permitted for "a productive purpose such as having a child", which would seem to include some cases of premarital relations.– msh210 ♦Jan 26, 2018 at 6:12
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@msh210 correct. I inferred the same thing. I'm not intending to give an answer, just noting that they apply, and make this an interesting question. (Otherwise I would have flagged it as a duplicate.)– רבות מחשבותJan 26, 2018 at 12:25
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2 Answers
Let us start with Yevamos 22a which says that any son whatsoever absolves a man's wife from doing Yibbum. The Gemara explains that this includes even a mamzer.
ביבמות כב ע"א כותבת: "מי שיש לו בן מכל מקום - פוטר אשת אביו מן הייבום".
The Minchas Chinuch explains:.
ומסבירה שם הגמרא כי הכוונה היא לבן ממזר. המנחת חינוך דן בשאלה אם אדם שיש לו בן ממזר קיים את מצוות פריה ורביה או לא. ניתן, כמובן, לחלק בין ממזר בהיתר - גר שנשא ממזרת, לבין ממזר באיסור. הירושלמי כותב שבכל ממזר יש קיום למצוות פריה ורביה, והמנחת חינוך עצמו מביא שתי אפשרויות בהבנת הירושלמי:
כוונתו רק לממזר בהיתר.
למרות שממזר באיסור הוא מצווה הבאה בעבירה - הביאה היא רק הכשר מצווה ולכן הולדת הממזר אינה נחשבת למצווה הבאה בעבירה.
Regarding the mitzvah of Pru urevu, the Minchas Chinuch has 2 options with regards to a forbidden relationship from the Torah that results in the birth of a mamzer:
Only someone that is permitted to marry a mamzer, e.g. a convert, can the child fulfill "Pru urevu". A child from a forbidden relationship is a mitzvah Haba beaveira.
Despite the Aveira caused by the relationship since the zera is only a means to the end but not directly resulting the child to be born (there is 9 months of pregnancy and many stages), the children (male and female) have made him fulfill his obligation of Pru urevu and this is not a mitzvah Haba beaveira.
So a forbidden relationship might still not be zera levatala since a child is born from the result (for which one might even achieve Pru urevu) even though it is a result of a grave aveirah that is punishable by death.
Since premarital relations are forbidden miderabanan and therefore the children are not mamzerim (as I have proven here Does Devarim 23:18 prohibit pre-marital relations) the seed is definitely not zera levatala as maimless children are produced from the zera and one has definitely fulfilled the mitzvah of Pru urevu (despite transgressing a severe rabbinical enactment for which the punishment is also death bidei shamayim).
Conclusion: the child is kosher and the zera was not wasted and has achieved its purpose of forming a child.
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The question was not about if a child was produced or not. The question is about if it counts as wasted seed, if ejaculation, in the context of premarital relations, occurred inside and not on the outside, even if a child was not produced by this act. Oct 12, 2021 at 19:33
In short, No, WoS way is by having no female "receptacle", no matter what way.
If you want to dig deeper, you should differentiate the Halachical prohibition from the Kabbalic one. I cited the later. Halachicly wise opinions differ vastly, some may call WoS for anything but having one's legitimate wife in ready to get pregnant way (even for the end of month cycle or already pregnant), but I regard it more as for educational purposes only.
To your second question, very same rules apply here. As people love credible citations, here's one from Rambam (IB 21,9) regarding one's wife, but it applies in general:
"י [ט] אשתו של אדם, מותרת היא לו; לפיכך כל מה שאדם רוצה לעשות באשתו, עושה--בועל בכל עת שירצה, ומנשק בכל אבר שירצה, ובא עליה בין כדרכה, בין שלא כדרכה, בין דרך אברים. ואף על פי כן, מידת חסידות שלא יקל אדם את ראשו לכך, ושיקדש עצמו בשעת תשמיש, כמו שביארנו בהלכות דעות; ולא יסור מדרך העולם ומנהגו, שאין דבר זה אלא כדי לפרות ולרבות."
But as I said, Halachic views differ vastly!
The real question here is not WoS but:
Znut ("prostitution"), as some (Rambam and more) consider such relations as Znut, and some not.
"Boel Aramit" (relations with gentiles), which is a different topic.
