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I guess I'm becoming more "outdated" regarding the current "frum fad".

A shadchan as well as a few young boys and girls told me that at some point between engagement and marriage they must attend a Chattan (for groom) or Kallah (for bride) class.

I have no idea what these classes are about. When I think of "class" I think of something in a school where they get homework and / or have labs.

What is the purpose of these classes? Are they mandatory? What type of person teaches these classes - a rabbi or "lay" person? What subjects are taught? Is this something given in a university, JCC, Adult Ed or privately? How long do these classes typically last and how frequently per week are they usually given? How many students typically attend? Can these be taken online?

I apologize for my ignorance and asking so many questions, but, this really puzzles me to the point that I'm not completely sure what to ask about it. My wife and I have been married a long time and we never took any of these classes. Did we miss out on some important opportunity, and should we be taking one of these classes, now, perhaps?

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  • possible dupe judaism.stackexchange.com/q/18707/759 judaism.stackexchange.com/q/2134/759
    – Double AA ♦
    Dec 6, 2017 at 20:27
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    I recommend striking the last paragraph. It looks like it's asking for personal advice.
    – Isaac Moses ♦
    Dec 6, 2017 at 20:31
  • @DoubleAA partial dupe. Perhaps, an answer can include a link to that question. I'm more curious as to what these classes are for.
    – DanF
    Dec 6, 2017 at 20:34
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    The classes are essentially basic sex ed, laws of mikvah and niddah, and some tips on personal relationships.
    – Clint Eastwood
    Dec 6, 2017 at 20:43
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    The main reason for those classes is Hilchas Niddah (at least that's what I've heard). It's one of those things that are both fairly complicated and you can't just "see" what others are doing.
    – ertert3terte
    Dec 6, 2017 at 21:59

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In Israel these classes are mandatory to get married. They are delivered in multiple places by different groups, e.g., the official rabbanut organizes some, private orgs as well (e.g., Aish HaTorah) and more insulated communities will have theirs. They are typically taught by women (often rabbanits or women in charge of mikvaot) for women. Some include a tour of a mikve to get familiar with it.

Content of the classes typically include the laws of mikve and nidda and some thoughts on making relations in the couple bloom. In more traditional communities, I understand they include content on physical relations as well.

See here for a view on a modern version of these classes by Aish Hatorah targeted at secular people in Tel Aviv.

PS. Sources for the above are discussions with the rav who runs Aish Tel Aviv as well as a Bnei Brak rav specialised in mikva and nidda.

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