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I have observed that Orthodox Jews seem to withdraw from those who were once "frum" (observant) but are now secular. Are they obligated to do so?
How are we to understand the parable in which God admonished Abraham for throwing an old man out of his tent for being an idol worshiper?
Far from it.
There is a commandment to love your fellow as yourself (Vayikra 19:18). There is also a concept of responsibility for another Jew ("kol Israel areivim zelaze", see Shevuot 39a and here on MY for more sources on the mitzva of kiruv). From there every Jew has to respect and love other Jews, no matter how close or far from observance they are. (as Chaim noted in the comments, this does not apply to an apikores, see here)
I don't doubt you have observed some Jews who distanced themselves from those who rejected Judaism. This might come from a worry this might negatively influence their children. But there are many examples of the opposite, actually there are entire organizations dedicated to bring those who are far from observance, whether from birth or because they distanced themselves over time. Chabad has 4000+ emissaries dedicated to this mission, and so do organizations such Aish HaTorah, Ohr Somayach, Arachim, and many others.
Regarding the parable you cite, it is a variation (with significant differences) of the Midrash (Bereishit Rabba 43:7 and 49:4) where Avraham provided food to strangers in exchange for blessings to God. I don't believe there is an authentic source for it (it is recounted here but see update below). If the person Avraham threw out was an idolater, Avraham was only following what the Rambam would later codify as halacha (Mishne Torah Hilchot Avoda Zara 2:5)
[...] A convert to idolatry, behold him, he is rebellious against the whole scope of the Torah. Likewise are infidels of among Israel not to be judged in aught as Israelites, nor should they ever be received as penitents, for it is said: "None that go unto her return, neither do they attain unto the paths of life" (Prov. 2.19) [...] It is forbidden to converse with them, and to answer any argument concerning them, as it is said: "And come not nigh the door of her house" (Ibid. 5.8)
The way the tale is recounted above feels very odd (especially its conclusion). I checked with talmidei chachamim and none to date could trace this parable.
UPDATE: I have now received a response from R David Hartley Mark who claimed on his site to recount "an old midrashic tale". He told me he didn't remember where he read it and referred me to here and there. He explicitly wrote "sorry it is not Bereshit Raba or some other lofty tome". I think we can now conclude this "midrashic tale" is nothing but a human invention and is no more midrashic than any other fable.
Judaism holds a fine balance between altruism and self-preservation. We are obligated to help others as long as it does not hurt or harm ourselves.
When dealing with (excuse me) "spiritually sick" people (Rambam's definition), one should weight the Mitzvah of reaching out and helping and bringing them closer vs. the prohibition of harming oneself. Imagine meeting someone infected with a virus. If you have the skills and knowledge of how to handle the disease you can help and connect with such person, but if you're not trained and have little knowledge of the situation you can harm yourself and, therefore, prohibited from contacting such person.
Most Orthodox Jews are "not trained" and can not handle proper communication with a person that left religion, risking either harm the person or harm himself, by letting doubts in, just like contacting an infected person.
This is the reason, that most Ultra Orthodox communities ban on contacting such people (army recruits in Israel, for example), as even talking about the possibility of the army service can seriously damage the whole community.
