I am a Reform Jew and ill-equipped to answer this question from a close friend who is not Jewish. Apparently, my (non-Jewish) friend is NOT invited to the (Orthodox) wedding of the daughter of a close friend & co-worker. It was explained to my friend that Orthodox Jews simply don't allow or invite non-Jews to their weddings. I told my friend, whose feelings were genuinely hurt, that I had never heard that tradition. As far as I know, anyone can invite anyone they want to their wedding. But, to repeat, I was raised Reform and am no expert on Orthodox traditions. You are the experts, right?
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Welcome to Mi Yodeya. Keep in mind, that few of us here are rabbis, if that's what you mean by stating that we are "experts". I'm not inclined to fully agree with stating "It was explained to my friend that Orthodox Jews simply don't allow or invite non-Jews to their weddings." I don't think that there is any prohibition. As a matter of fact, I have been to numerous Orthodox weddings where the bride and / or groom invited some Gentile co-workers. I agree that it is not overly common to invite Gentiles, but, I think it's simply b/c many just don't associate with them as close friends.– DanFNov 15, 2017 at 2:58
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Welcome! Consider reading this short useful Beginners' Guide to the site.– mevaqeshNov 15, 2017 at 4:16
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@sabbahillel To whoever voted to close, the case behind the question may be unknown, or unknowable, but that doesn't affect the question itself, which is quite clear.– mevaqeshNov 15, 2017 at 6:04
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@sabbahillel You seem to be making stuff up. I see no indication of this whatsoever, and neither does anyone else. You are just making vague claims about what the OP really wants, etc. etc. Rather than simply addressing the question actually asked.– mevaqeshNov 15, 2017 at 6:44
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@mevaqesh The OP said what he thought had been said to the nonJewish friend and that his feelings were hurt. If the question had been asked without those details, I would not have considered this. However, this does appear to need more details as to what was said and what is going on.– sabbahillelNov 15, 2017 at 6:48
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1 Answer
It is difficult to rigorously prove the negative, but as someone who has much familiarity with Orthodox Jews and Orthodox weddings, I can state that there is no such prohibition. Non-Jews at Orthodox weddings are not so rare (although admittedly not overly common).
R. Yehuda Amihai affirms here, that it is permissible.
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It is important to note that Orthodox Jews tend to be fairly cloistered (the degree being largely dependent on which sub-group they belong to). Accordingly, generally the significant majority of their friends will be other Jews. This will reflect itself in who will be found at a wedding.– mevaqeshNov 15, 2017 at 3:18
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But just because it is permissible by Jewish Law does not mean that all Orthodox Jews will invite non-Jews to their weddings. Some might feel uncomfortable doing so, either out of their own opinions or what their community might think. It would be interesting to know if the Jew in the OP was from a Hasidic stiebel. That might change things a bit.– ezraNov 15, 2017 at 5:26
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