After we die, do we get to be one with our wife that we married here and love her still? Or does that go away?
If you are asking about a relationship with her in the world of spirits, sometimes called Eden, where we go when we die, there is a famous Agadata in Taanis 25a which states the righteous sit with their wives in the world to come.
How you want to take Agadata is up to you.
אמרה ליה דביתהו עד אימת ניזל ונצטער כולי האי אמר לה מאי נעביד בעי רחמי דניתבו לך מידי בעא רחמי יצתה כמין פיסת יד ויהבו ליה חד כרעא דפתורא דדהבא (חזאי) בחלמא עתידי צדיקי דאכלי אפתורא דדהבא דאית ליה תלת כרעי (ואת) אוכלת אפתורא דתרי כרעי The Gemara further relates: Rabbi Ḥanina’s wife said to him: Until when will we continue to suffer this poverty? He said to her: What can we do? She responded: Pray for mercy that something will be given to you from Heaven. He prayed for mercy and something like the palm of a hand emerged and gave him one leg of a golden table. That night, his wife saw in a dream that in the future, i.e., in the World-to-Come, the righteous will eat at a golden table that has three legs, but she will be eating on a table that has two legs. (אמרה ליה) ניחא לך דמיכל אכלי כולי עלמא אפתורא דמשלם ואנן אפתורא דמחסר אמרה ליה ומאי נעביד בעי רחמי דנשקלינהו מינך בעי רחמי ושקלוהו תנא גדול היה נס אחרון יותר מן הראשון דגמירי דמיהב יהבי מישקל לא שקלי When she told her husband this story, he said to her: Are you content that everyone will eat at a complete table and we will eat at a defective table? She said to him: But what can we do? Pray for mercy, that the leg of the golden table should be taken from you. He prayed for mercy, and it was taken from him. A tanna taught in a baraita: The last miracle was greater than the first, as it is learned as a tradition that Heaven gives but does not take back.
If you are asking about the situation after the revival of the dead, there is discussion in some sefarim whether the wife of someone who becomes an angel like Eliyahu, or someone brought back to life is still married to him or not.
This discussion is focused on alot in many Kabbalistic works whom I cannot quote or recall the names of, but I've seen quoted in a work called Shaar Reuven by R' Reuven Kamil. This seffer is kind of unobtainium where I live.
Basically there were those who said after Techias Hameisim people are not married or related anymore. There were those who said they are. Then there later Kabbalists who combined the two approaches. If the body had not completely dissolved yet and it is brought back to life, the relationship continues. If the body had completely dissolved, they are no longer married/related. This seemed to have been a happily accepted medium ground by the seffarim he quoted.
First Mishna in Kidushin states that there are 2 ways to annul a marriage bond: A Get and Death of the husband.
We also know (from an explicit verse) that one may marry one's wife's sister after one's wife dies - so the wife's death annuls the marriage also.
So in the afterworld (or whatever you want to call it) you'll have to court your spouse and remarry them, if you're both still in love with each other, and are halachically allowed to marry them.
So now we could ask questions like:
- Would you be able to choose which of the sisters to marry? They are now both your wife's live sister.
- Would a Cohen Gadol be allowed to remarry his wife if he died first? She'd be a widow.
The gmoro in chezkas habatim says that avrohom was in the bosom of sarah