When is a convert's Hebrew birthday?

Question

Is it their conversion date, the Hebrew date on which they were biologically born, or something else? (For questions of halachic age as well as mystical significance)

Answer 1

Dinonline answers,

Although a Ger is considered to be “born anew” when becoming Jewish, this is a halachic concept that relates to family relationship and the like, and it is not a “biological fact.”

The Ger’s birthday thus remains the date that he was physically born on.

Note that there is no actual halachic significance to a person’s birthday, other than determining his age, which is important only for a bar or bat-mitzvah. For this purpose the date of birth is of course the “birthday.”

Interestingly enough, they seem to write in a different answer that the main birthday is when the ger receives his neshama:

Q: When does a ger celebrating his Jewish birthday – on the Jewish date of his birth or on the Jewish date of his giyur? A: He can celebrate both. One day to thank H-shem for giving him his neshoma, and this is surely the main birthday, however he can also celebrate on the day that H-shem gave him his physical body.

Answer 2

Edit: The Rebbe in Igrot Kodesh 30:18 and in Hiskashrus 211:308 says that it's reasonable to say a convert’s birthday is the day of their conversion based on Yevamot 22a that says, גר שנתגייר כקטן שנולד דמי.

According to Rav Asher Weiss it seems that he holds we only say גר שנתגייר כקטן שנולד דמי with regards קירבה, יחוס, דיני שמים so according to this, a convert would celebrate his birthday when he was actually, and one is considered the same age before he converted.

Rav Yitzchak Yosef in Yalkut Yosef Sefirat Haomer page 844-854 in the section called קונטרס דברי יוסף סימן ה seems to conclude like Rav Asher Weiss that only with regards to קירבה, יחוס, דיני שמים do we say גר שנתגייר כקטן שנולד דמי, and one is considered the same age before he converted.

It is still recommended to celebrate the day of conversion, according to Rav Yitzchak Yosef and Rav Asher Weiss as it is a happy day.

Answer 3

Biologically speaking, the day of birth is when the head crowns and the first breath is drawn. This corresponds to the idea from Bereshit 2:7 which says:

וַיִּ֩יצֶר֩ יְהֹוָ֨ה אֱלֹהִ֜ים אֶת־הָֽאָדָ֗ם עָפָר֙ מִן־הָ֣אֲדָמָ֔ה וַיִּפַּ֥ח בְּאַפָּ֖יו נִשְׁמַ֣ת חַיִּ֑ים וַיְהִ֥י הָֽאָדָ֖ם לְנֶ֥פֶשׁ חַיָּֽה׃

That for various possible reasons, (Some are discussed in Sefer HaGilgulim by the Ari z"l.) G-d decides that the Jewish soul blown in through the nostrils of a future convert is dressed in a non-Jewish body at birth.

This body is considered non-Jewish because the material body of the unborn child grows from the body and blood of the non-Jewish mother in the womb. Even if the fertilizing seed is contributed by a father who is Jewish, during the process of gestation, the physical body of the growing fetus acquires the status of the non-Jewish mother and when the soul finally enters that body at birth, the complete living being, soul dressed in a body, has the status in this world of the external vessel which contains it. This is determined by the Creator and like all things from Above, is only good.

In terms of halacha, this person is not Jewish at birth. But they become a living being, soul dressed in a body at that moment. Their actual birthday is then.

All the significant details, in terms of the orientation of the solar and lunar calendars and the positions of the constellations, meaning the moment in time according to the order of the universe are relevant, just like with anyone else.

For this particular type of individual, they have an unusual path set out for them in terms of personal avodah. G-d directs them, through Divine Providence, through the various tests and circumstances of their life which their particular soul requires in order to arrive at the best possible moment, when they are motivated sufficiently, to enter or re-enter under the wings of the Shechinah. See Rashi to Bereshit 12:5.

This can happen at different times, sometimes early in physical life, sometimes quite late, even shortly before drawing their last breath at the end of life.

But the overriding drive, like a salmon returning to the river in which it was spawned so many years before, is that such an individual is consumed with the desire to become Jewish, to be accepted by the entire Jewish people, as one of their own without exception and in all circumstances.

And ultimately, the only way to accomplish this is to accept what the Torah (that was given at Mount Sinai, meaning both the written and oral Torah) requires, just like it happened to the entire Jewish people, literally and physically. (The act is the primary thing! המעשה הוא העיקר) This is what Moshe Rabbeinu meant in Devarim 29:12-14 which says:

לְמַ֣עַן הָקִֽים־אֹתְךָ֩ הַיּ֨וֹם ׀ ל֜וֹ לְעָ֗ם וְה֤וּא יִֽהְיֶה־לְּךָ֙ לֵֽאלֹהִ֔ים כַּאֲשֶׁ֖ר דִּבֶּר־לָ֑ךְ וְכַאֲשֶׁ֤ר נִשְׁבַּע֙ לַאֲבֹתֶ֔יךָ לְאַבְרָהָ֥ם לְיִצְחָ֖ק וּֽלְיַעֲקֹֽב׃ וְלֹ֥א אִתְּכֶ֖ם לְבַדְּכֶ֑ם אָנֹכִ֗י כֹּרֵת֙ אֶת־הַבְּרִ֣ית הַזֹּ֔את וְאֶת־הָאָלָ֖ה הַזֹּֽאת׃ כִּי֩ אֶת־אֲשֶׁ֨ר יֶשְׁנ֜וֹ פֹּ֗ה עִמָּ֙נוּ֙ עֹמֵ֣ד הַיּ֔וֹם לִפְנֵ֖י יְהֹוָ֣ה אֱלֹהֵ֑ינוּ וְאֵ֨ת אֲשֶׁ֥ר אֵינֶ֛נּוּ פֹּ֖ה עִמָּ֥נוּ הַיּֽוֹם׃

That in order to make a legally binding covenant in this world, the parties must be alive, meaning a soul dressed in a physical body. There were root souls of the entire Jewish people physically present, souls dressed in their bodies, when this covenant was started by Moshe Rabbeinu between G-d and the nation then.

But there were also present at that time, all the future souls, not yet dressed in a physical Jewish body. Those souls initiated at that time their future acceptance when they would eventually come to be dressed in a physical, Jewish body. This follows the explanation from the Komarna Rebbe in his introduction to his commentary on the Chumash, Heichal HaBracha and also the commentary Maskil David by Rabbi David Pardo there.

When a potential Jewish convert follows the same procedure that all Jews followed in order to receive the Torah at Mount Sinai, their physical body is chosen by G-d, just like then and the Jewish soul that up until then had been dressed in a non-Jewish body, is then dressed in a new, Jewish body. This is the true meaning mentioned in the Torah of Gathering the Holy Sparks (those souls) that fell at the very beginning of Creation from the shattering of the vessels and that were dispersed among the various nations of the world. The status of that body becomes chosen by the Creator and that vessel is converted from its original status to a new and different thing.

Like is taught by the Lubavitcher Rebbe, G-d's choice is not between the Jewish soul and the non-Jewish soul, which are categorically different, like is emphasized in Bereshit 1:24-27, Bereshit 2:7. It is between the two things that are similar, meaning the body.

This is why, after conversion, the Jewish convert is required to say the Torah blessings at the start of each day, just like any other Jew, which includes the specific language:

בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה יְיָ אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם, אֲשֶׁר בָּחַר בָּנוּ מִכָּל הָעַמִּים וְנָתַן לָנוּ אֶת תּוֹרָתוֹ. בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה יְיָ. נוֹתֵן הַתּוֹרָה:

Blessed are You, L-rd our God, King of the Universe Who chose us from among all the peoples and gave us His Torah. Blessed are You, L-rd, Giver of the Torah!

Otherwise, it would be an invalid blessing!

This is also why a convert is compared to a young child. (כמו קטן שנולד בזה עתה) Like a child that is born at that moment, just like is stated in tractate Yevamot 22a.

And in this context, it is important to note the precise choice of words from Yevamot, that the new convert is like a child (וְגֵר שֶׁנִּתְגַּיֵּיר כְּקָטָן שֶׁנּוֹלַד דָּמֵי.) That a child (קטן) is not a newborn infant (ילד) emerging from the womb of its Mother.

And like is defined in tractate Gittin 65a, there are three different stages for someone referred to as a child:

1. When they are mature enough to know what they do and do not want for themselves. In actual children, this is approximately age 3 to 5. This age range is also related to the time to begin Torah education for a Jewish child.

2. When they mature enough to understand buying and selling. That when they sell something, it no longer belongs to them. This occurs in actual children at approximately age 6 to 9.

3. When they mature enough to make vows (nedarim), (which is one year before sexual maturity which Torah defines as 11 years old for girls and 12 for boys.) and to first enter into marriage (which Torah defines as up until age 20). It should be noted that this final threshold is in relation to being able to have children, reproduce and raise a family responsibly (reaching the age of majority).

In this last context, it is appropriate to note that the Giving of the Torah (מתן תורה) at Mount Sinai is compared to and is the paradigm for Jewish marriage like Ramban Shimon ben Gamliel says in Mishnah Taanit 4:8.

וְכֵן הוּא אוֹמֵר, צְאֶינָה וּרְאֶינָה בְּנוֹת צִיּוֹן בַּמֶּלֶךְ שְׁלֹמֹה בָּעֲטָרָה שֶׁעִטְּרָה לּוֹ אִמּוֹ בְּיוֹם חֲתֻנָּתוֹ וּבְיוֹם שִׂמְחַת לִבּוֹ (שיר השירים ג). בְּיוֹם חֲתֻנָּתוֹ, זֶה מַתַּן תּוֹרָה.

Their previous status of being a non-Jew ceases to exist and they are one of the Jewish people from that moment forward. For the true convert, the day of their conversion is the completion of the act that was started so long ago at Mount Sinai. In that sense, it is for them, their personal and very real moment of receiving the eternal Torah.

And in summation from all the above, I would like to thank Avishai Tebeka for causing me to look more closely at what the Lubavitcher Rebbe has written in regard to the various customs for the observation and celebration of ones birthday like it appears in Sefer HaSichot 5748, volume 2, pages 406-47.

That the Rebbe enumerates that one celebrates the birthday because of the blessing of increased and continued life (meaning a soul dressed in a physical body), which would pertain to biological life. For the Jewish convert, that begins like it does with all living creatures.

The Rebbe even says that where possible one should try to say the Shehechiyanu prayer on ones birthday (over new fruit or a new garment). Which says:

בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה יְיָ, אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם, שֶׁהֶחֱיָנוּ וְקִיְּמָנוּ וְהִגִּיעָנוּ לַזְּמַן הַזֶּה.

Blessed are You, L-rd our G-d, King of the Universe, who has given us life, sustained us, and brought us to this time.

He also mentions starting to recite the new chapter of Psalms corresponding to ones biological age.

The Rebbe also compares it to Rosh HaShanah and a time for personal reflection over the past year and how to improve oneself in the coming year. Rosh HaShanah relates to both Jews and non-Jews in accepting G-d as being King over all of creation and in that sense, for the Jewish convert, it would connect to the day of biological birth.

But at the same time, the Rebbe suggests that one should reflect on one of the times when they had a private meeting with their Rebbe. To recall what they asked about, what answers they received and how they can improve in those areas to study his teachings, his Torah. That would seem to relate more to the actual day of conversion.

But the Rebbe also says that with each new birthday, one should increase in their Torah study, both in the revealed aspects of Torah and the inner aspects of Torah and to increase in influencing others in particular with regard to Ahavat Yisrael, loving you fellow Jew. For the convert, that would specifically relate to the day of their actual conversion, when they became a Jew in physical, material reality.

And finally, the Rebbe suggests arranging a festive gathering with family, friends and loved ones in order to praise and thank G-d in particular in regard to ones personal joy over Torah and the performance of the commandments. That relates to the idea of Matan Torah, the acceptance of the Yoke of Heaven and the acceptance of the Yoke of the Commandments and so would relate, for the Jewish convert, to the actual day of their conversion.

Answer 4

You can reckon with both of them. I would compare it to the two ways we tally the start of the year. For agricultural and judgement purposes we reckon from tishrei which in the predominant opinion was when the world was created whereas for national-spiritual purposes nissan is counted as the first month as that is when we left Egypt and attained our new dimension. So too with a convert, one birthday recognizes and celebrates his arrival into this world, with all the potential that entails, whereas the other birthday serenades his spiritual birth and the day he elevated his life to a whole other dimension.