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Is one allowed to see his wife undressed. If not, is he allowed to just see her nurse their child. To put it generally, do all the laws of Tznius also apply between a man and his wife?

marked as duplicate by Double AA halacha Aug 29 '16 at 13:05

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See Rambam, Kedusha, Isure Bia, 21, 9 (This is about the wife when she is not nidda):

ט אִשְׁתּוֹ שֶׁלָּאָדָם, מֻתֶּרֶת הִיא לוֹ; לְפִיכָּךְ כָּל מַה שֶׁאָדָם רוֹצֶה לַעֲשׂוֹת בְּאִשְׁתּוֹ, עוֹשֶׂה--בּוֹעֵל בְּכָל עֵת שֶׁיִּרְצֶה, וּמְנַשֵּׁק בְּכָל אֵבֶר שֶׁיִּרְצֶה, וּבָא עָלֶיהָ בֵּין כְּדַרְכָּהּ, בֵּין שֶׁלֹּא כְּדַרְכָּהּ, בֵּין דֶּרֶךְ אֵבָרִים ‏{ ‏חלק זה לא נמצא בגירסא של מכון ממרא_: וּבִלְבַד שֶׁלֹּא ‏‏יוֹצִיא שִׁכְבַת זֶרַע לְבַטָּלָה. ‏עד כאן. ‏}‏ וְאַף עַל פִּי כֵן מִדַּת חֲסִידוּת שֶׁלֹּא יָקֵל אָדָם אֶת רֹאשׁוֹ לְכָךְ וְשֶׁיְּקַדֵּשׁ עַצְמוֹ בִּשְׁעַת תַּשְׁמִישׁ כְּמוֹ שֶׁבֵּאַרְנוּ בְּהִלְכוֹת דֵּעוֹת. וְלֹא יָסוּר מִדֶּרֶךְ הָעוֹלָם וּמִנְהָגוֹ שֶׁאֵין דָּבָר זֶה אֶלָּא כְּדֵי לִפְרוֹת וְלִרְבּוֹת: ‏

... so, what he desires, it's permitted to make it with his wife ... {he hase to be careful, not to lose seed @Double AA signaled me that this part is absent in accurate version of Mechon Mamre}.

But the ideal behavior is Kedusha. See Rambam Deot 5, 4:

אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁאִשְׁתּוֹ שֶׁלָּאָדָם מֻתֶּרֶת לוֹ תָּמִיד, רָאוּי לוֹ לְתַלְמִיד חֲכָמִים שֶׁיַּנְהִיג עַצְמוֹ בִּקְדֻשָּׁה: ‏

A scholar need to adopt a holy behavior despite that his wife is always permitted for him.


צְנִיעוּת גְּדוֹלָה נוֹהֲגִים תַּלְמִידֵי חֲכָמִים בְּעַצְמָן: לֹא יִתְבַּזּוּ, וְלֹא יְגַלּוּ רֹאשָׁן וְלֹא גּוּפָן.

Scholars comportment is very modest, they don't humiliate themselves an do not discover head and body.

Isure Bia 21, 10:

אָסוּר לְאָדָם לְשַׁמַּשׁ מִטָּתוֹ, לְאוֹר הַנֵּר ‏

It is prohibited to have marital relationship near the light of a candle.

  • 1
    mechon-mamre.org/i/5121.htm#10 is the accurate text of the Rambam. Your edition has errors. – Double AA Aug 29 '16 at 13:03
  • @DoubleAA fixed. Interesting, I was thinking machloket between Tosfot and tosfot Rid and Rambam – kouty Aug 29 '16 at 13:16
  • Yes, it's certainly relevant. – Double AA Aug 29 '16 at 13:25

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