How should one go about davening in a minyan on yom haatzmaut when his custom is not to change davening?
My minyan does no tachanun and hallel without a bracha after shmona esreh.
Should I-
do everything like them? (al tifrosh min hatzibbur. alt., it's not a big deal, just go with it)
do everything normal? (meshaneh matbeah)
say tachanun but join in hallel or the responses? (The tzibbur is praising Hashem for eretz Yisrael, how could you not?)
Precedents or Rabbinic quotes are appreciated.
Generally a good idea would be not to do anything that actively shows contempt for the congregation's practice (unless you really feel like you have to be an iconoclast). Stand up when they're standing, sit when they're sitting. You might want to compare, for instance, questions of a fellow whose practice differs from the congregation's with regards to tefillin on Chol HaMoed, or an Israeli visiting America on the second day of YomTov. (On the former, for instance, if everyone in the shul is wearing tefilin and one person isn't, that's not demonstrating a conflict; maybe that one person just has severe digestive problems and may need to excuse himself any minute now.)
I know of one fellow whose practice was to say Tachanun (the extra-sad prayer) who arrived at a shul that was saying Hallel (extra-happy prayer). He stood when they stood and just said his sad prayer, no one noticed what page he was on or exactly what words he was saying to himself. Meanwhile, another fellow at that shul felt like making a public statement that his opinion was to say neither the happy prayer nor the sad one; he made a very clear point of getting up from his seat and going to sit and read some Tanach for a few minutes. That generated friction with his fellow congregants -- do you really need to go there?
Otherwise, whatever your view on how to observe Israeli Independence Day in a religious manner, you'll probably have some range on what other views are "valid", which would affect how you'd behave when surrounded by others whose practice is different than yours. Many, for instance, find Hallel without a bracha, after the davening, unobjectionable as you're just saying some extra Psalms (once your formal text of prayers are over, sure say whatever Psalms you like, any day you like, why not?).
you should look for a minian that do it like you.
I heard that the rav of shemuel hanavi (the neighborhood) goes to a dierent minian on this day just because of that, looks like his kehila does halel and he doesn't, so he goes to another minian
bigger problem would be a bahur ieshiva, since he needs to pray in the ieshiva. I saw people that because of that go home, or make themselves a bigger weekend and go back after. but this is no solution for overseas students.
I asked my rav once about someone that wants to say halel on a minian that doesn't: he should say it after finishing shaharit, quietly he doesn't need to show off what he is doing.
I would say that someone that wants to say tahanun just do it quietly, he can finish his prayers alone.
As a personal example, I usually pray minha with a minian that doesn't do tahanun on minha ever, I simply do it alone
If the minyan says hallel, say it along with them. At worst it's just a few perakim of Tehilim. You don't have to say a Bracha, no one will know and you will not cause anyone to raise any issues.
