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At a wedding, according to Chabad custom, a silver spoon is placed at the entrance to the yichud room. The chosson walks in first by stepping over it with his right foot first. What is the significance of this?

  • See Rabbi Zalmanov's comment at the end of that article. – Yishai Nov 23 '15 at 16:45
  • 4
    Perhaps it's related to the (non-Jewish) practice of the groom presenting the bride with an engraved silver teaspoon on their wedding day to symbolize that they will never go hungry and/or the practice of the new couple stepping over a broom into their new marriage (see, e.g.,: traditionscustoms.com/wedding-traditions/… ) – Loewian Nov 23 '15 at 17:53
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Some say the reason is for parnoso and lihavdil as @Loewian says above.

Some people say by foot note 14

מנהג לשים כף כסף בפתח חדר הייחוד של חתן וכלה, ואמר לי כך:
אחד הדרכים שהאישה מתקדשת בהם הוא קידושי כסף, ובדרך זו נוהגים למעשה לקדש את האישה. אמנם לפועל הקידושין נעשים בהרבה קהילות על ידי טבעת זהב שהיא שווה כסף אך איננה כסף ממש. ומאחר וכסף מסמל על אהבה מלשון "נכסוף נכספתי", לכן כדי להשלים את העניין מבחינה רוחנית, ולהשלים את ה"קידושין בכסף", מניחים כף כסף בפתח חדר הייחוד שלכמה דעות הוא השלמת הקידושין. כף מסמלת כלי קיבול, ובעניין זה כלי קיבול לאהבה. ‏ (Source).
[14] הרב ברוך בליזינסקי, כפר חב"ד.‏

or footnote 13

[13] על פי "ספר המנהגים חב"ד" עמ' 76. אפשר שהטעם להנחת כף הכסף הוא כי כסף מורה על חסד ואהבה וכף מורה על כלי קבול ועל כן מניחים זאת בתחילת התייחדותם של החתן והכלה בחדר ייחוד.‏

Or as @Yishai sais in comment above "See Rabbi Zalmanov's comment at the end of that article."

August 27, 2015.
Re: why the silver spoon.
The wedding ring used to be made of silver, "kesef" in Hebrew. It is similar to the Hebrew word "kosef," which means yearning and love. Because most people use gold rings today, the silver spoon represents this same affection.  All things in Judaism start with the right hand or foot, because it represents strength and permanence.
Eliezer Zalmanov for Chabad.org

The reason is that silver is connected to love (as the Rebbe says in sif 15.3)

ג) קידושין הו"ע של אהבה, שזהו"ע כסף, מלשון "נכסוף נכספת")

and the spoon is a receptacle.


It is brought in Sefer HaMinhagim

After the chuppah a silver spoon is placed on the threshold of the yichud room. The chassan steps over it as he enters, followed by the kallah.


The Rebbe in a shicha said that the minhagim of the nosi hador are for everyone to do especially the minhagai hasuno that is giluy... Page 198 sif י

י. האמור לעיל הוא בנוגע למנהגים בכלל. ובפרט בנוגע למנהגי חתונה – ה"ז בודאי נוגע לכל, שהרי בנישואין צריך להתגלות כח האין-סוף ב"דור ישרים יבורך", וכיון שהתגלות כח הא"ס נמשכת ע"י נשיא הדור, לכן נוגע יותר שתהי' ההנהגה במנהגי בית הרב.‏

And one of these minhagim was to step over a silver spoon page 200

היתה מונחת על סף דלת חדר היחוד כף של כסף, והציווי הי' שלא לדרוך עלי', אלא רק לעבור על גבה.

Edit Another reason for silver by a wedding is that silver is a good siman in Hebrew (כסף) the numerical number increases with each letter (20, 60, 80) From Chukai Noshim Ben Ish Chai chapter 45

enter image description here

  • 1
    I don't think the question was asking for the source, rather the reason/significance. – Yishai Nov 23 '15 at 17:20
  • @Yishai I am looking for it, it is for parnoso – hazoriz Nov 23 '15 at 17:21
  • Re "The Rebbe in a [sicha] said that the minhagim of the nosi hador are for everyone to do": See judaism.stackexchange.com/a/6146: "There are practices that are known to have been specific to the Rebbeim"... "in the absence of any evidence that this was meant as a template for others to follow, we might well assume that this was one of the Rebbe's private minhagim" – msh210 Nov 23 '15 at 17:45
  • @msh210 I see no source there but I brought a source, it is possible I am wrong but I need a source more than an answer on mi yodeya – hazoriz Nov 23 '15 at 17:49
  • @hazoriz re your comment: First of all, your source refers to customs at a wedding only, not in general, AFAICT, whereas your answer makes it sound like it refers to customs in general. Second, that sicha in תורת מנחם is בלתי מוגה. Third, Rabbi Alex Heppenheimer who wrote that answer is a source (though I have no way of evaluating his reliability versus that of the publishers of תורת מנחם). Fourth, en, hachi nami, maybe you're right, and maybe R'AH would even agree to it (inasmuch as he wasn't writing about a wedding specifically); I'm just pointing out what he said. – msh210 Nov 23 '15 at 18:50

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