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I was once told that parents have a bigger say regarding who you (maybe only male) marry before you are 24 years old

Is this true? if yes sources please

(The only thing I saw that changes after the age 24/25 is that the parent needs to stop hitting his child since he is putting a stumbling block(his son will hit him back))

  • given judaism.stackexchange.com/q/64899/759 this seems unlikely – Double AA Nov 22 '15 at 20:44
  • @DoubleAA In the answer there he bring "Though he adds that it's usually the right thing to do for both sons and daughters to ask their parents' advice or otherwise involve them somehow" so it is not so simple – hazoriz Nov 22 '15 at 20:48
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    אִם הַבֵּן רוֹצֶה לִשָׂא אִשָׁה, וְהָאָב אֵינוֹ מִתְרַצֶה, אֵין הַבֵּן חַיָב לִשְׁמֹעַ לוֹ - Kitzur SA 143:12 - toratemetfreeware.com/online/f_00561.html#HtmpReportNum0142_L2 – Danny Schoemann Nov 23 '15 at 10:29
  • The only thing I saw that changes after the age 24/25 is that the parent needs to stop hitting his child since he is putting a stumbling block(his son will hit him back Where did you see this? – mevaqesh Nov 21 '16 at 17:08
  • @mevaqesh - See Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 240:20 - הַמַּכֶּה לִבְנוֹ גָּדוֹל, מְנַדִּין אוֹתוֹ, שֶׁהֲרֵי עוֹבֵר עַל לִפְנֵי עִוֵּר לֹא תִתֵּן מִכְשׁוֹל (וַיִּקְרָא יט, יד) . וְלא מִקְרֵי גָּדוֹל לְדָבָר זֶה, רַק אַחַר כ''ב שָׁנָה אוֹ כ''ד שָׁנָה – Danny Schoemann May 21 '17 at 9:54
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I think I found what he was referring to

Kiddushin 30a

Raba said to R. Nathan b. Ammi: Whilst your hand is yet upon your son's neck,* [marry him], viz., between sixteen and twenty-two. Others state, Between eighteen and twenty-four.

*While you have yet power and influence over him.

So it seems that before 24 the father has influence on his son, and can get him to get married

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    Note the context of the Talmud seems to be to an ancient social convention, not to contemporary convention, and certainly not to a legal right. – mevaqesh Nov 21 '16 at 17:07
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    Also, we're not talking about forcibly marrying the son off, but rather about exerting your influence in "pushing" him to get married. Presumably for a match you find more appropriate than he might find if left to his own devices... – Isaac Kotlicky Dec 21 '16 at 17:51

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