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I've read this re women drinking the havdala wine, though do women need to hear havdala at all? If they miss it, should they say the brachos themselves?

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The Rema (OC 296:8) writes that as the Shulchan Aruch brings two opinions as to whether women are obligated to say havdala or not, they should not recite it themselves, but should listen to a man saying it instead. The Mishna Berura (296:34) explains that women are obviously obligated to keep all laws of Shabbos. The difference of opinion lies in whether havdala is treated as a part of Shabbos, or as a regular time-bound mitzva (such as tefillin which women are exempt from). The Taz (296:7) points out, however, that women must say Hamavdil Bein Kodesh L’Chol before doing any melacha.

The Biur Halacha writes that women may make havdala, though should omit the beracha of Meoiray Haesh on the candle. The Aruch Hashulchan (296:5) and R’ Moshe Feinstein (CM 2:47), however, write that women may say this beracha, too, in the same way as they would on shaking a lulav if they wish to do so. Likewise, R’ Eliezer Waldenberg (Tzitz Eliezer 14:43) criticizes the calendars that advise women against making the beracha on candles.

One reason why women avoid making havdala is because the Shelah (quoted by the Magen Avraham 296:4) writes that women shouldn’t drink the havdala wine (for Kabbalistic reasons). The Aruch Hashulchan points out that not everyone keeps this custom, and it’s more important to properly fulfill havdala.

Source: Dose of Halacha

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    One can make havdala on other drinks than wine. I think it is only wine that has kabala reasons not to be drunk by women. It is to do with chava having given Adam wine. – cham May 31 '15 at 18:36
  • @cham the brocha on eish is a hefsek between the hagafen and the drinking. Thus woman don't drink the wine. – Shoel U'Meishiv May 31 '15 at 19:34
  • that is not the kabala reason @Mefaresh – cham May 31 '15 at 20:58
  • You wrote "I think it is only the wine that has kabalah reasons...." in telling you there are halachic tapas as well – Shoel U'Meishiv May 31 '15 at 21:00

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