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If someone needs to say Kaddish for a parent but is intimidated to be the only one in shul saying it, is it permissible for the Chazzan to say the Mourner's Kaddish and the Rabbi's Kaddish at the same time, even if he is not in mourning? This could be useful if the mourner would like to not be the only person heard.

  • If one of the chazan's parents isn't alive (possibly even if one of the 7 close relatives aren't alive) he can say kaddish for someone who doesn't say. What I'm saying is that he can find a mourner who doesn't go to shul and say kaddosh for that person with you. I'm not exactly sure as to whether he can say it for no reason, so ask you rabbi (look at why this was put on hold as off topic). Just think, if you were any one else in the shul, you wouldn't think of it as weird if a mourner says kaddish alone, so don't feel embarrassed. The minhag is to say kaddish all the time, (to be cont.) – user613 Aug 21 '14 at 13:56
  • so I assume it's good for the neshama – user613 Aug 21 '14 at 13:56
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    KQ, welcome to Mi Yodeya! Please take a look at the "on hold" notice and the information linked in it. I recommend that you pose your situation to the rabbi of your shul, as he has the local knowledge, authority, and responsibility to determine how prayers are conducted there. Your "also another question" sounds like it's a more general question and not a request for a practical ruling, so maybe it would be best to edit this post to just be about that question. – Isaac Moses Aug 21 '14 at 17:38
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    Yes, many questions do that. It's a fine line between asking for psak and asking for halacha though. The deciding factor is often how personal the question is. @Mike took the liberty to edit it to be less personal, so i've cast a reopen vote. – Scimonster Jan 4 '15 at 20:10
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Anyone can say kaddish if they have at least one deceased parent, or if they have permission from their living parents. In a synagogue with no mourners, they'll usually have someone say at least one kaddish (usually the one after Aleinu). I had a teacher who lost a parent relatively early in life; years later, he was working at one yeshiva that asked him to say every mourner's kaddish, which he found difficult as it brought up memories of the first year of loss. But he was fine doing one kaddish per service.

So if there's no one saying kaddish, and the chazzan (or any person in the congregation, for that matter) lost a parent years ago (or has his parents' permission), he certainly could and likely should do so. The question here is saying it along with an uncomfortable mourner. (Keep in mind there are synagogues that give each mourner one kaddish of his own, so the mourner would be used to saying it solo! But most mourners at this point are used to a chorus -- or cacophony -- of sorts.) I think this will be the local rabbi's call (plus whoever's being asked to say kaddish) whether the mourner's comfort warrants having someone unnecessarily saying kaddish, plus any discomfort to whoever's saying it.

  • Do you have a source for "if they have permission from their living parents"? – Josh Jun 13 '17 at 8:04
  • I don't see how this answers the question. – Ploni Jun 13 '17 at 22:00

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