If someone is having a hard time finding a shidduch, what can they do to help the process along?

Are there any recommendations brought in the holy books that will make it easier?


The Talmud (Bava Kama 92a) states:

כל המבקש רחמים על חבירו והוא צריך לאותו דבר, הוא נענה תחילה
Anyone who asks for mercy for his friend, and he needs that thing too, he is answered first.

So you should consider praying for other people who have predicaments similar to your own.

(Inspired by this answer.)

  • 1
    I assume that refers to the merit of genuinely caring for another; not to turning care for one's friend into a charm to promote personal gain. – mevaqesh Jun 2 '16 at 17:00
  • @mevaqesh I'm just reporting what the Gemara says. If seeing one's own plight is a cause for you to notice and think about others', so be it. – Double AA Jun 2 '16 at 17:08
  • I agree that it is meritorious to notice the plight of others and do what one can to relieve it. I fear, however, turning them into a hefza shel segulah. – mevaqesh Jun 2 '16 at 17:11
  • @mevaqesh I fear you are making up concepts to have fears about. – Double AA Jun 2 '16 at 17:12
  • Ashrecha that you have not been exposed to this in real life to know that it is a reality not a theoretical concern. – mevaqesh Jun 2 '16 at 17:16

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