Why would a Jew get upset when gentiles claim to be Jews? [closed]

Question

I am running into a problem repeatedly.

I am Jewish, and I study Kabbalah in an organization with both Jews and non-Jews. The non-Jews I study with keep insisting they are Jews, because they feel that studying Kabbalah makes them Jewish. I try to accept their identity, but sooner or later I find myself upset by it. I feel that it’s somehow insulting my grandparents and ancestors for all they went through, and for continuing to keep Torah and mitzvot through it all.
But there is something more than that inside me that I don't understand. It makes me angry and, even more than that, like I want to cry. It goes away for a while and then it comes back up. Is this just a personal issue or could there be some reason from our history that I can't shake this disturbing feeling?

Answer 1

Two things:

1. Jews are a family. Imagine some random stranger walks into your house and tells you that if you don't adopt them, you're a bigoted supremacist. It's insane. Similarly, if a non-Jew claims to be a Jew, feeling that they're wrong is not only normal, but indicative of mature emotional understanding. In fact, it would be entirely rational to feel anger, not just displeasure. (This is a major provocational point for reform and conservative “converts”).
2. The few people who actually understand Kabbalah also know that Kabbalah is an intimate secret that isn't shared freely with everyone, nor with all Jews, nor even with all Rabbis. Rather, Kabbalah is reserved only for the most naturally intelligent, good-willed, trustworthy, humble, experienced, extensively knowledgeable, adult Rabbis, and only in small groups where each student can be taught precisely and clearly with no mistakes whatsoever. Therefore, you are ABSOLUTELY NOT learning Kabbalah.
   There are dozens of fake organizations out there that make up a bunch of pseudo-magical ideas and slap words like “Keter” and “Elyon” on them, then market themselves as teaching Kabbalah for a hefty price. They’re basically a more organized version of those guys who sell “Cabala charms” on the street. It’s all a giant scam. Stop being scammed.

The deep “disturbing” feeling you’ve been experiencing comes from being expected to accept these random strangers as part of the Jewish people, simply because they identify as such. As a Jew, it doesn’t matter how strongly you are convinced that they’re right; in the deepest part of your soul, you know that they’re not your brothers. You’re feeling the conflict between what you’re trying to accept and what you know in your soul. To resolve the conflict, understand that their identification with the Jewish people is completely wrong, and stop giving your money to that “organization”.

Don't let anyone pressure you into validating non-Jewish appropriation of not just Jewish culture, but Jewish status itself. We have enough crazies in the world already. You have enough critical thought to ask this question; don't lose that.

Answer 2

One of the reasons a Jew will get upset when gentiles claim to be Jews is similar to the case mentioned below.

A veteran of the US military, let's say a navy Seal, who went through war/conflict and saw it all, goes to the mall and sees a faker with a navy seal badge walking around. That will infuriate the veteran. It is common sense why it will infuriate him and I will not go through the psychological aspects of it. This concept is known as 'Stolen Valor'.

The same concept applies here. When a goy claims he is a Yid, then that is stolen valor. Not cool to do that! Either go through boot camp and prove yourself in battle or just leave it alone. (Boot camp and proving yourself in battle in this case would be going through an orthodox conversion and living every moment according to the Torah).

Edit: You don't have to prove anything after conversion. I don’t want to sound like converts have a special mitzvah or obligation to prove themselves. They are just as Jewish as anyone. If they excel then fine, if they are mediocre that’s fine too. That’s a different topic. But you get the point.

Answer 3

If a non-Jew transgresses halacha while claiming to be a Jew, other Jews may be misled by his actions. (Marat 'ayin)

Answer 4

@Qwertrl I really resonated with your "family" explanation. I would like to add two other ideas.

The first is similar to the "family" argument. You know how we sometimes refer to ourselves as "The Tribe." Now imagine another tribe. Let's say the Apaches. So there is a class at a local community college on Native Americans, and a lot of the people in that class are not Native Americans. Would it make any sense for someone in that class, on the basis that they have fallen in love with Apache culture, go around telling people they are Apache? I imagine that if this ever happened, real Apaches would have quite a bit to say.

The second point is simply a practical issue. While there are certainly exceptional goyim who have taken the time and trouble to thoroughly understand Jews and Judaism, let's face it -- people in a Kabbalah class don't fit in that box. If they go around saying they are Jewish, when they have only scratched the surface, they will undoubtedly spread a lot of misinformation about us.

It's always irritating because any discussion with them about this always ends up in the "Are Jews a religion, race, or ethnicity" topic, which takes a great deal of effort to respond to, and even then, most people just don't listen because they think they already know the answer.