In the Gemara in Berochos daf 61 it says that one may not walk behind ones wife.
So how is it that Abba Ḥilkiyya in Tananis daf 23 went after his wife into the house, even if he didn't want to check the Rabbanan, surely he could of changed the order: The Rabbanan, Him then his wife last?

  • 1
    I've seen this question brought up. Pashtus since she was dressed up all pretty for him, he didn't want others to go behind her. Or, she was 4 Amos away so it's fine.
    – Moshe
    Jun 28, 2020 at 21:56
  • @Moshe The first pashtus doesn't make sense since they didn't need to go behind of her she could of gone in last?
    – Russell
    Jun 28, 2020 at 22:12
  • Shabbos 2a, pashtus it's not a way to treat those that are coming for your help. As the ג and ד are shaped, the ג represents Chesed and the ד represents the one in need. So the ג chases after the ד, so he needed to go in first, his wife first (Brachos - wife knows the guests better {out of context, but you get the point} ) so that's why she went in first and not last
    – Moshe
    Jun 28, 2020 at 22:15
  • Who said he walked directly behind her, maybe she went in, then after she moved away he went in.
    – Dani
    Jun 28, 2020 at 22:20
  • @Moshe So if the ג chases after the ד, then surely the Rabbanan are the poor here so then gimmel who is Abba Hikkiyya should of gone after?
    – Russell
    Jun 28, 2020 at 22:27

1 Answer 1


Ben Yehoyada sidesteps the issue by positing that either they were not directly behind her, or that there was more than four amos between them.

ואין להקשות איך היה הולך אחרי אשתו? דאפשר היה מצדד צידודי. אי נמי היה יותר מארבע אמות ביניהם דמותר כמפורש בדברי רבינו האר"י ז"ל בשער המצות.

Maharsha says that a host has to enter first because of Derech Eretz; with that stipulation in place, the order is forced to be having his wife enter first.

מ"מ עיילה היא ברישא והדר עייל מר כו'. ולא היה לך לילך אחריה דאמרינן פרק הרואה לא ילך אדם אחר אשה ואפילו היא אשתו והיה לך לילך ברישא ואח"כ אנן ואח"כ אשתך וא"ל דהוצרכתי לילך אחריה משום דלא בדקיתו לי לילך היא אחריכם בקרוב לכם והא לא תקשי שילכו הם ברישא ואח"כ הוא ואח"כ היא דדרך בעל הבית ליעול ברישא לבית ולא אורח:

  • Basically everything that Moshe said in the comments Jun 29, 2020 at 0:23
  • 1
    @False but sourced so +1
    – user6591
    Jun 29, 2020 at 1:04

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