Request for suggestions on how to respond and assist someone in this scenario:
During the break yesterday, I spoke with a tween-age girl who explained that she felt no purpose in davening in the shul to ask for forgiveness based on the prayers that are in the Siddur. She said as an example, "I am not Shomeret Shabbat, I don't eat kosher, and I know that I'm going to continue this way. (Why she wants to is a separate complex issue.) The same can be said for almost all the people coming in the shul today. These are 3-day-per year shul attenders. They're coming here all pretending to ask forgiveness from God for the sins that they committed, but they're insincere. They all know that as soon as Yizkor is over, they will drive back home on Yom Kippur, knowing that it's forbidden to do so. But, they choose to continue that way, anyway. So, what's the point?"
Granted, I tried to explain that maybe all God wants from you is to ask forgiveness for those sins that you really are sorry about and that you feel that you can change. But, that didn't seem to work, because she thinks it's a whole process and it involves "everything or nothing".
I'm sure that there are various halachic or maybe Jewish psychological books that can explain how to answer this point. Can anyone suggest any ideas?