Although the Rema (648:7) says a grown pitom-less esrog is valid

אם לא היה לו דד מעולם כשר וכן הם רוב האתרוגים שמביאים במדינות אלו

are there any Jewish sources which encourage purchasing a pitom-less esrog? (I heard it's supportive of shalom bayis)

  • There is nothing directly in the Torah that mentions even the word Etrog, let alone anything about a pitum. By "Torah source", I assume you mean Talmudic / Rabbinic. (You may want to edit the Q.) Judging from the fact that most people are using one with a pitum, I'm thinking that a pitum is preferable. However, without a pitum does offer a huge advantage of not worrying that the pitum will break if you drop the etrog or mishandle it. – DanF Oct 3 '19 at 1:40
  • @DanF Thank you for letting me know about Torah source - I assumed that included essentially every Jewish source (I didn't want Wiki answers). As for pitum, I trust that most people in your area use a pitum, but the shul with hundreds of people I literally just bought from in Baltimore generally doesn't have too many pitum esrogim... – NJM Oct 3 '19 at 1:49
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    @NJM Your definition of Torah is indeed one of the correct ones. Of course, on Mi Yodeya your definition should be followed for every answer, so it's not really necessary to ask for Torah sources in that sense. – Daniel Kagan Oct 3 '19 at 7:05
  • Offhand, I don't think having a pitum or not matters. I'm not familiar with the Shalom Bayit aspect. However, I wonder if that means avoiding or minimizing the "inevitable" arguments / discipline that happens in families when "Curious Klonimus" drops the etrog and the pitum breaks. Not having the pitum avoids this problem. – DanF Oct 3 '19 at 14:38

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