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17

Someone asked this of Rabbi Yaakov Hopfer, a major posek on these matters in Baltimore. He said without hesitation that it was permissible. His interpretation of the prohibition on "s'chok vekalut rosh" is "behavior that is suggestive or disinhibiting." I don't see a normal "I love you" as either of those.


16

Kitzur Shulachan Aruch 10:1 says וכל הזהיר במצוות תפילין, לנהוג בהם קדושה, שלא לדבר בהם דברי הבלים ושיחת חולין, מאריך ימים ומובטח שהוא בן עולם הבא, שנאמר: "ה' עליהם" (שנושאין עליהם שם ה' בתפילין) – יחיו, ולכל בהן חיי רוחי, ותחלימני והחייני" And anyone who is careful with the Commandment of tefilin, to behave with them in holiness, not to speak, ...


13

I've heard and seen this idea, in stories / biographies of people careful with how many words they used. but I could not locate an online source. The closest so far is: "When a man speaks and expels hevel (breath) from his mouth - this breath is his lifeforce (chiyuso). The proof of this is after the soul has left the body, there is not left in him ...


11

In Be'er Moshe, R' Moshe Stern relates how it was the custom in his home not to allow children to see their reflection in the mirror before their teeth come in or before they begin to speak. In regard to several of these type of (bizarre) customs, he writes: וכל אלו הג׳ מנהגים בכלל מנהג נשים זקינות שעליהם כתב הרשב״א שאל יזלזלו בדבריהן ובמנהגיהם כי בודאי ...


10

The Talmud (Shabbos 33a) states (using Is. 9:16 as a prooftext) that obscene speech causes various national troubles, G-d forbid. It then goes on to say: "Rabbi Chanan bar Rava says: Everyone knows why a bride enters the bridal chamber. Nevertheless, if one speaks obscenely about it, even if there was a Divine decree that he enjoy seventy years [the average ...


10

A person whose wife is nidah is still obligated to love her as much as he loves himself; anything he says in order to "lessen the tension in the air" is permitted (Nit'ei Gavriel 33:4 and footnote 8). So I guess to say "I love you" to "lessen the tension in the air" is permitted, but to say it for no reason may be closer to lightheadedness.


9

I once heard Rav Shmuel Kaminetsky describing the life of a certain Rav in a little shtetel many years ago. The people of the village were unlearned, and the Rav, who was a big Talmid Chacham, had no one with whom to converse in Torah learning. What did he do? He would put his hat on the banister next to the Aron Hakodesh, and speak as if there was an ...


8

See Shulchan Aruch Orach Chaim 489:4 that when one says tonight is such and such during Bein HaShemashos (the period of twilight when it is possibly day, possibly "night") one may no longer count again with a blessing. The M.B. seif katan 21 says that one has fulfilled ones obligation b'dieved (after the fact) even not having said "of the Omer". Since one ...


8

The Rambam in Perush Hamishnayos Avos Perek 2:1 says that a Mitzva Kala is learning Loshon Kodesh. Harav Yitzchak Yosef in Yalkut Yosef Hilchos Talmud Torah Seif Koton 78 also says it is a Mitzva.


8

It's known as ona'at devarim. Taking advantage by words, or as Rabbi Torczyner calls it, verbal abuse. The example of asking someone unknowledgeable to put them down is discussed here, by Shulhan Arukh in the laws of Ona'at Devarim. Leviticus 24:14-17: כה,יד וכי-תמכרו ממכר לעמיתך, או קנה מיד עמיתך--אל-תונו, איש את-אחיו. כה,טו במספר שנים אחר היובל, ...


8

Shaalos U'Teshuvos Rabbi Akiva Eiger 29 says that someone who wrote the number of the day of Sefira he must count still with a Bracha והדבר ברור שצריך לחזור ולספור בברכה. Birchei Yosef 489:14 discusses someone who wrote a letter and in the letter wrote the number of the day in Sefira - that he has to count with a Bracha לאו כמספר בפיו ולא עלתה לו. ...


8

Jewish Action, Summer 2005 edition, has a "What's the truth about..." column by Rabbi Dr. Ari Z. Zivotofsky on not meeting for the week preceding the wedding. His main point is the lack of old sources for this custom, but he does cite several newer sources and the reasons they give. See there for the details, but the reasons and post-facto rationales offered ...


7

The Talmud discusses this issue in Pesachim 3a. There it brings a number of instances where a verse uses extra letters to avoid saying a negative word. Here's one example that it brings: The verse by Noach (Genesis 7:8) says to bring into the ark animals that are טהורה (pure) and animals that are אשר איננה טהורה (lit. that are not pure). This is instead of ...


7

Based on the addition to your question: The law might have been translated as something like "bad mouth", though I think that slander might not have been included because that implies that the bad-mouthing is false. — I have to say you must be referring to lashon hara, "evil speech", which is (very generally) telling true tales that hurt someone. ...


7

The Tzemach Tzedek (Lubavitch) wrote, that if we only knew the power of saying Psalms, and the positive spiritual effect they had we would say them constantly! See this video: Hayom Yom Shevat 24. And the text can be found here


6

Presumably he thinks he's speaking to Eli. Malbim explains accordingly: Shmuel's "Hineni" in v. 4 is to tell Eli, "I'm not sleeping!" and then he runs over to see just what Eli wants from him. The second and third times, then (vv. 6 and 8), he doesn't need to repeat this phrase, because Eli already knows he's awake; he just goes over and says, "I am here ...


6

It is superstition, which Jewish women likely absorbed from the surrounding culture. I wrote in another answer about upsherin and the Pennsylvania Germans / Dutch, where the Pennsylvania Germans are continuing an old superstition from Europe (and where upsherin is explicitly not practiced by Tannaim/Amoraim). Similarly, R' Menasheh Klein's endorsement of ...


6

While it proceeds to list leniencies/exceptions, the Shulchan Aruch Orach Chaim 146:2 states initially that it is prohibited even to speak Divrei Torah even in between aliya's (i.e. while the Torah reading has paused). One leniency is for one for whom "Torah is his occupation" but the M.B. 9 cites the Elya Rabba (who cites many Rishonim) that no one today ...


6

The Vilna Gaon held (Maaseh Rav 18): ולילך בהם כל היום אפילו משא ומתן מותר ואכילת עראי ג״כ מותר רק דברים בטלים אסור And to go with [the Tefillin] all day, even business matters are permitted, and even non-fixed eating is also permitted, only useless words ["Devarim Beteilim"] are prohibited. It seems like he's saying that regular actions that are ...


6

See Igros Moshe Even Haezer 3:35 where he says it is a mitzvah to speak lashon hakodesh based of Sifri (Devarim Piska 46) which is quoted by Rashi on the verse of l'daber bam (Devarim 11:19). (The tshuvah is focused on non Jewish names.)


6

The Rambam (Hil. Avel, 4:4) presents this custom as halacha, and he is followed by many other rishonim including the Rokeach (Hil. Aveilus, 313), Sefer HaAgudah (B'rachos, Chapter 9), Kol Bo (§ 114), and the Ramban (Toras HaAdam, Sha'ar HaSof, Inyan HaHotza'ah). This custom is also presented by such later authorities as the Beit Yosef (YD 376) and, more ...


5

I think the usual source is Talmud Bavli Shabbos 33a, although the context there is aggadic rather than halachic. It identifies what is called "nivul peh" (obscene speech) as a cause for many a tragedy in the Jewish people and derives this from Yeshayahu 9:16. It also states there that for one who employs nivul peh, gehinom (hell) is "made deeper" for him. ...


5

The Fifth Lubavitcher Rebbe writes that one should not speak Lashon Hakodesh as a day-to-day language. As Lashon Hakodesh is a holy language, one shouldn't use it for mundane speech. Rabbi Shimon Ben Yochai said that if he would have been by Mt. Sinai, he would have asked for Jews to have another mouth, one to talk about one's needs and one with which to ...


5

Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah Siman 240:2 says “it is forbidden to call a parent or refer to them by their name; rather they need to be referred to as “My father [my teacher]”. This post shows that the use of the third person was well-known in the past. But for today, Rabbi Simcha Weinberg in his blog says “My father zt”l often explained that each generation ...


4

Consult your local Orthodox Rabbi. The other answer already gave reasons to forbid. I'll give a broader picture as to why one might permit. 1 The basic gemara in question regarding speaking during leining or between one aliyah and the next is in Sotah 39a: Raba son of R. Huna said: When the Torah-scroll is unrolled it is forbidden to converse even on ...


4

Tol'dos Yotzchak (by Rabbi Yitzchak Karo, uncle of the Bes Yosef), in his commentary to 4:10, says that "כבד לשון" refers to an impediment in pronouncing the so-called tongue letters, דטלנת;‎ "ערל שפתים", the lip letters, בומף; and "כבד פה", the rest. ["לא איש דברים", then, would seem to be an all-embracing expression.]


4

Isaiah 9:17- Therefore the Lord will take no pleasure in the young men, nor will he pity the fatherless and widows, for everyone is ungodly and wicked, every mouth speaks vileness. And for all this, his anger is not turned away, his hand is still upraised. As @GershonGold pointed out, the Talmud (Shabbos 33a) derives from here that nivul peh is a very ...


4

Here's a shiur talking exactly about your question (haven't listened to it) I would define texting and using social media sites to be basically the same thing. http://www.yutorah.org/lectures/lecture.cfm/782704/Rabbi_Aryeh_Lebowitz/Ten_Minute_Halacha_-_Talking_Texting_and_Eating_in_the_Bathroom (in English). Some sources discussing something similar to your ...


4

The Chochmas Adam (Issur v'Heter, 89:7) decries the practice of going to a gravesite and unburdening oneself to the deceased by telling them about one's problems. However, he writes, this is not strictly a violation of consulting with the dead (see Deut. 18:11) since the communication is understood to go only one-way.


3

I choose option 1 (be a good example) because I think that option 2 (pray at home) is hurting you more than helping you and option 3 (break away minyan) goes against the duty of all who are able to combine Yiras Shamayim and Ahavas Yisrael. Personally, I only react to talking if it is particularly loud and/or actually disturbing me during the Amidah. I do ...



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