Hot answers tagged shidduchim-dating
My understanding is that many people today will start off with the assumption that a woman who bacame baal teshuva after a certain age is just not kohen-eligible. As for your question -- it's not an easy matter, but if it's prohibited it's prohibited. ("Don't embarrass someone" doesn't mean I can ignore the serious possibility of halachic prohibitions.) As ...
The Talmud says when you look into a prospective girl you should look into her brothers (Bava Basra 110a). Rav Yaakov Kaminetzky is reported to have said that this no longer applies, as it was said in a time when girls stayed in the home and that was their primary sphere of influence. However, today a girl will be influenced by a much broader sphere and ...
The first quality that comes to mind from the Torah is good Midos. Avraham did not want Yitzchok to marry the daughters of Canaan (Breishis 24:3 and Kli Yakar there) since he did not want Yitzchok to learn from their bad Midos. When Eliezer goes to find Rivka his test is if she is a Baalas Chesed, again checking out her Midos. (Breishis 24:14).
Excellent question. Greetings and welcome to J.SE! German and Sephardic Jewish men begin wearing a Tallis many years before marriage; the question if anything is why those of Eastern European ancestry wait until marriage. I'm told that once a man gets married and starts wearing a Tallis, the practice (I wouldn't say "must", but certainly "normative ...
There are number of people one may not marry. This includes non-Jews, close relatives, and married people. For some Jews it also includes converts, mamzerim, divorcees, or others. (Sources include Rambam.) One should make sure that the person one is planning on marrying isn't in any of these categories.
Have a look in the Tosafos בתולה שעיברה in חגיגה on :דף י"ד Essentially Tosafos there brings a possible rule that if the wife would also be transgressing (in that case והוא אשה בבתוליה יקח) then we can rely on her. As opposed to Yichus issues where she really has nothing to lose if she lies. So we may to able to answer your question thus: As long as the ...
The Rama 240:25 writes : הגה: וכן אם האב מוחה בבן לישא איזו אשה שיחפוץ בה הבן – אין צריך לשמוע אל האב (מהרי"ק שורש קס"ז). If a father protests a marriage a son does not have to listen. I would assume to get married to a specific girl is also not under kibbud Av.
The Lubavitcher Rebbe specifically discouraged giving a ring at any time during the engagement. (The practice in Chabad is to give the diamond ring* in the Cheder HaYichud after the Chuppa, and even other gifts are not given directly, or at least not with witnesses). This is apprently explained at length in a Sicha of Nasso 5741, which unfortunately is not ...
I hear it exclusively from the Litvish/Yeshivish type crowd, although that doesn't mean it doesn't transfer out over time. It means actively seeking shidduch opportunities - i.e. talking to Shadchanim, going out on dates. It is probably not earlier than late 20th century, certainly not in common usage, as I remember when I would hear it said differently ...
technically one isn't obligated to have tzitzis at all unless one is wearing a 4 cornered garment. today we go out of our way to have a four cornered garment to not miss out on the opportunity of a positive mitzvah. this being the case though once one starts taking on this as a regular action they may not stop doing so.
Here is a comment posted by Rabbi Yossi Jacobson, in response to a question on one of his essays: The way I understand it is this: In most cases, when we follow the proper guidelines in life, we marry our “bashert.” But not always. Sometimes people get divorced because it is not the “bashert;” yet it is a necessary step in their journey in ...
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