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20

From Rav Aviner's tshuvot (text) Wearing Wife's Jacket in the Cold Q: Is it permissible for a husband to wear his wife's jacket if he is cold, or is it forbidden on account of "Lo Yilbash" (the prohibition of cross-dressing)? And what about visa-versa? A: It is permissible, since the purpose is not to wear it but simply to warm up (Shut ...


13

The Sages say yes on Nedarim 20b. Rabbi Johanan ben Dehavai advocates for a more ascetic approach to sexuality that is rejected by a different Rabbi Johanan in the name of the Sages, who assert that anything a man wants to do with his wife, he may do, equating this appetite to one for food, and acknowledging that people have different tastes. Rambam, and ...


12

The mishna in Y'vamos (6:4) indicates that a widow is forbidden to a Kohein Gadol whether she was a widow only from erusin (when intimacy was still forbidden) or whether she was a widow even from nisu'in: כוהן גדול לא יישא את האלמנה--בין אלמנה מן האירוסין בין אלמנה מן הנשואין. This is quoted as halacha by the Rambam (Hil. Isurei Bi'ah 17:11): ...


11

He is reciting Numbers 6:24-26 (he only gets through half of the last verse in that clip): The LORD bless thee, and keep thee; The LORD make His face to shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee; The LORD lift up His countenance upon thee, and give thee peace. This is known as the Priestly Blessing and it is sometimes used when parents bless ...


10

1 - Conservative and Mamzerut are two separate issues. If the boy is Jewish (his mother is Jewish) then he does not need to convert. He would be considered a Baal Teshuva, one who has repented. He does not require any specific training, although if he is serious about his orthodoxy should learn the Mitzvos in order to lead a proper orthodox life. 2 - If the ...


9

There are only two ways out of a kosher marriage: a kosher get or death of a spouse. (Kiddushin 2a) It doesn't sound like any semblance of the former (a document handwritten by a Jew for the divorce of this specific couple including their names, the date, specific formulations, signed kosher witnesses, etc. presented to the wife by the husband again in ...


9

According to the GaRNa"T at the beginning of Maseches Kesubos, there is a school of Rishonim which holds that Nisuin is not a "transaction" (קנין) but is rather the initiation of their living together as husband and wife (תחילת הנהגת אישות). According to this school of thought, at least, one would not be able to send a shaliach, as Nisuin is not an "act of ...


8

The Rambam in הלכות דעות פרק ה says the following: כג: דרך בעלי דעה, שיקבע לו אדם מלאכה המפרנסת אותו תחילה, ואחר כך יקנה בית דירה, ואחר כך יישא אישה--שנאמר "מי האיש אשר נטע כרם, ולא חיללו . . . אשר בנה בית חדש . . . אשר אירש אישה" (ראה דברים כ,ה-ז) "The behavior of intelligent people is to first get [trained in] a job so he can support himself, then ...


8

The answer is that a Cohen who has relations with a non-Jewish woman is not removed from his sanctity and therefore not permitted to marry a woman who's had relations with non-Jews. רמבם הלכות איסורי ביאה פרק יט:א איזו היא חללה: זו שנולדה מאיסורי כהונה; וכן אחת מן הנשים האסורות לכהונה שנבעלה לכוהן, נתחללה. אבל הכוהן עצמו שעבר העבירה, לא נתחלל. ...


7

Based on 45+ years of marriage, I can assure you that whatever you say to your wife (other than the two most important words in a marriage) would probably not help. Rabbi Moshe Heinemann in his pre-pesach shiurim will emphasize that you do not have to go overboard (and the women do not accept that). Rabbi Avigdor Miller in his tapes on the subject tries to ...


7

In some more "Yeshivish" circles (this was pretty normal among my crowd in Yeshiva), the custom is to propose with a bracelet, not a ring, and it is usually done with some formulation of "will you marry me." If the "question" is asked, people are careful to do so without any witnesses, to prevent the marriage taking halachic effect. The kneeling thing is ...


6

I believe the earliest source is Pirkei Derabbi Eliezer Chapter 16. החתן דומה למלך מה המלך הכל מקלסין אותו שבעת ימי המשתה כך חתן הכל מקלסין אותו שבעת ימי המשתה מה המלך לובש בגדי כבוד כך החתן לובש בגדי כבוד מה המלך שמחה ומשתה לפניו כל הימים כך החתן שמחה ומשתה לפניו כל שבעת ימים מה המלך אינו יוצא לשוק לבדו כך החתן אינו יוצא לשוק לבדו מה המלך פניו מאירות ...


6

The Lubavitcher Rebbe specifically discouraged giving a ring at any time during the engagement. (The practice in Chabad is to give the diamond ring* in the Cheder HaYichud after the Chuppa, and even other gifts are not given directly, or at least not with witnesses). This is apparently explained at length in a Sicha of Nasso 5741, but I couldn't find it in ...


6

It means "cosmic match" and does not have any religious meaning (as the word "cosmic," as it is transliterated there, does not originate in hebrew).


6

The 3 letters on the back are one of G-d's 72 names derived from Shemot 14:19-21. See here. You can find websites online that connect each of the 72 names to different things, but I have no idea if that is authentic Kabbala or new-age mumbo jumbo. This was discussed somewhere else on this site, but I can't find it right now.


6

Rambam Hilchos Ishus 15:19: וכן ציוו חכמים שיהיה אדם מכבד את אשתו יותר מגופו, ואוהבה כגופו; ואם יש לו ממון, מרבה בטובתה כפי הממון And similarly the Sages commanded that a person should honor his wife more than his own body, and love her like his own body. If he has money, he should increase her benefits according to his wealth.


6

The Torah uses the male form for the words, and the Sages extrapolated from here that male Amonites and Moavites are banned from the congregation, but females are not. It says on Chabad's Ask the Rabbi page that the decree was made against the men because they did no go to greet the Jews with food and drink. (See Devarim 23:5.) This was not expected of the ...


6

Rashi on Breishit 26:2 (@Yez is correct). Summarizing Rashi and Sifsei Chachamim's emmendations - Yitzhak was considered as a sacrifice (which, he was from the akieda). Sifsei Chachamim says he was considered Kodesh Kadashim ("most holy") and such sacrifices were not allowd to be taken out of the azarah. The entire land of Israel was considered the azara at ...


6

The Maharam Shik posed this question in the first teshuva on Even Ha'ezer. (See the second and third paragraphs here). He says that the Avot wanted to have holy descendants and therefore delayed the mitzva of 'peru urvu' until the time that they could find the most suitable spouse. Generally, one is allowed to delay the fulfilment of a mitzva if one will ...


6

The basic rule is there is no allowance to speak lashon hara to relatives. See for instance Hilchos Lashon Hara Klal 8, Siff 10 on page 215. In fact the Chafetz Chaim there advises against telling your wife all the ways you were mistreated during the day because it will cause her to lose respect for you too! The Chafetz Chaim in Hilchos Lashon Hara Klal 6, ...


6

Judaism requires Jews to marry other Jews. But, like many laws, not everyone keeps this. A religiously-observant Jewish man is allowed to marry a non-religiously-observant Jewish woman, but they will have to have some serious conversations -- for instance, if she doesn't keep kosher but he does, will the kitchen be kosher? A non-observant Jewish man could ...


5

One big one that I know of and have experienced is that when assessing if the children of this marriage are Jewish later in life, many times the parents' Kesuba will be taken as important evidence of that - if it was an orthodox one.


5

A woman who prevents her husband from having relations with herself, is a מורדת - and this is grounds for divorce. Details can be found in the Rambam - הלכות אישות - Ch 14 (Halachot 10 - 15) and in Shulchan-Aruch Even-HaEzer Ch. 154:3-6 (למי שכופין להוציא בגט)


5

Rav Asher Weiss writes in his approbation of the RCA Prenup about supporting the RCA Prenup from the Nachlas Shiva document: לענ"ד אין זה ענין לני"ד דנראה לכאורה דתקנה זו עיקרה ויסודה באמת להבטיח את קיום האשה והספקת מזונותיה, ולא כאמצעי לאלץ את הבעל לגרש את אשתו, וא"כ אין מזה ראיה לנידון דידן.‏ In my humble opinion this is not related to our case ...


5

"If she immerses in a Mikveh and a court of three observant Orthodox Jews finds her Giur to be successful, then she is a Jew, right?" Right, though you'd want to make sure the beis din is widely accepted. See the list of RCA batei din (http://www.judaismconversion.org/batei.din.html), or the list of batei din accepted by the Israeli Rabbanut ...


5

The current answers don't address the question in detail. So here goes: What is the source and reason for this? The source is the Mishna in Yevamos 64a and the subsequent discussion in the Talmud there. The reason is that the man is commanded to have children, and after 10 years with no pregnancy, he needs to do something else to fulfill the Mitzvah. It ...


5

The Ramchal writes in a letter that in his time (already 300 years ago) there is no longer "one" soulmate for everyone - in earlier generations, complete souls came to the world, and each soul had it's other half. However, today our souls are actually just fractions of greater souls, and not necessarily is there a corresponding "piece" to your fraction of a ...


5

It depends on who you ask, and how they interpret the sources. The Mishna on Ketubot 72a list it as Das Yehudit (which the gemara contrasts with DeOraysa): מתני' ואלו יוצאות שלא בכתובה העוברת על דת משה ויהודית ואיזו היא דת משה מאכילתו שאינו מעושר ומשמשתו נדה ולא קוצה לה חלה ונודרת ואינה מקיימת ואיזוהי דת יהודית יוצאה וראשה פרוע וטווה בשוק ומדברת עם כל ...


5

Excellent questions; I'll take these out of order, forgive me here. "The congregation of God" here simply means marrying into the Jewish mainstream. So a man who chose to be castrated is allowed to marry a convert, but not a born-Jew. "What is the spiritual significance?" Don't go there. It's a technical law on the books. For all other aspects, he's a Jew ...


5

Let's go back to our Bible. G-d says "it's not good for the human to be alone." So the very first source we have on marriage isn't about procreation, it's about emotional support. Now the humans are told to "be fruitful and multiply", so procreation is important. Some rabbis have said that getting married per se is an obligation because it's the only legal ...



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