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Citing Sefer Hasidim (450), HaRav Eliyahu Mansour explains that: [...] The soul of a deceased person experiences great pleasure when his or her loved ones come to pray at [his or her] gravesite. These prayers provide immense benefit for the soul in the next world, thus prompting them to pray to G-d on behalf of the living. Sefer Hasidim's Wikipedia ...


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Qitzur Shulhhan Arukh, Yalqut Yosef (Orahh Hayim 619:18), citing Midrash Sifrei on Parashat Shoftim, states (my translation): יש נוהגים לומר אזכרה למתים, וקרוביהם נודרים לצדקה לעילוי נשמתם, כי אף המתים צריכים כפרה, וכמו שאמרו בספרי, כפר לעמך ישראל אלו החיים, אשר פדית אלו המתים, מלמד שאף המתים צריכים כפרה Some are accustomed to recite a memorial ...


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According to the Tur's OC 291 reading of the Rambam Shabbas 30:9 one should recite kiddush by the third meal and so did the Shibulei Haleket's Rebbi(Rav Meir Bar Moshe). See the Kesef Hamishna 4 who disagrees with such a reading and brings many opinions. He adds that one who is makdish does not lose anything. The Shibulei Haleket explains why we don't say ...



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