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Partial answer: There is no Shabbos problem of sending it even if it is already Shabbos where the recipient is (see last paragraph here).


After the Return by Rabbis Mordechai Becher and Moshe Newman, a guidebook for baalei t'shuva, covers this. To summarize the discussion in Chapter 6: You should offer to do (and fund) the shopping to avoid placing an extra burden on them. The best case is that they agree to kasher the kitchen, and he says that some parents are actually willing to do that ...


The reality is that for many Baalei Teshuva they simply won't have the knowledge to really dynamically adapt to such a situation. Things like this can raise situations that can absorb the greatest Rabbis in discussions about exactly what to allow and what not, and anyone facing this situation for real should discuss the expected situation in advance with ...


A main part of the answer seems to be in some of the above comments. In brief, the easiest solution is to use cold already prepeared foods and paper / plastic goods. By "cold" I refer to either items already cooked that don't need to be reheated (e.g. - take out), or items that don't have to be heated in the first place (bread, cereal, cheese, etc.) If you ...

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