NOTE: Please respect that in the Jewish tradition certain questions, especially certain questions relating to sexuality, are discussed only in private. Such questions will be closed or deleted at the discretion of the moderators or community.
31
votes
5answers
2k views
What is the halachic source for objection to gay (civil) marriage?
New York State is considering legalizing gay (civil) marriages, so tonight on our answering machine we received a message urging us to pray that it doesn't pass because gay civil marriages were, you ...
20
votes
2answers
1k views
What is the point of having a rapist marry the woman he raped?
Deuteronomy 22:28-29 (JPS)
28 If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, that is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found; 29 then the man that lay ...
16
votes
6answers
2k views
What does Judaism think about homosexuality?
Is being gay a sin? Can one be a Jew and a gay person at the same time? How does the Jewish community think about gays?
15
votes
1answer
348 views
Do Jews need to care about non-jewish homosexuality?
Since there is currently no way and/or need for Jews to administer capital punishment to gentiles who violate the 7 noahide laws, is there any halachic reason for a Jew to care whether or not a ...
11
votes
11answers
1k views
How can I curb my sexual desire?
I am looking for the best and most practical suggestion as to what a man can do to curb his yetzer hara (evil inclination) for sexual desire. Please provide sources for why your answer should be ...
11
votes
4answers
843 views
If masturbation is so bad, why is it not in list of 613 Mitzvos?
If masturbation is, as stated in the Shulchan Oruch (Even HaEzer 23:1), "the worst sin in the Torah", then why is it not listed in any of the various lists of 613 Mitzvos and why is there no verse in ...
10
votes
2answers
630 views
Does Judaism consider virginity to be a virtue?
Wikipedia outlines the attitudes of various cultures towards virginity including:
Judaism
In Judaism, sex is not considered to be sinful. Though premarital sex is disapproved, there is no ...
10
votes
2answers
295 views
Would a baalat teshuva need a get from each previous sexual relationship?
Would a baalat teshuva need a get from each previous sexual relationship? In light of the idea that marriage can be contracted solely through bi'ah/public knowledge of the couple's relationship (as ...
8
votes
4answers
1k views
Does the act of masturbation cause a change in one's spiritual/religious status vis-a-vis what he may and may not do?
Obviously masturbation is a very serious sin. However, if someone has already transgressed that sin, does his status change vis-a-vis things like learning Torah or davening? Does he need to go to a ...
8
votes
1answer
184 views
Religiously sensitive guidance on when to tell your child about human reproduction
A boy in cheder who has no internet at home, no tv, etc, is not exposed to human reproduction in the way that others are. It's therefore up to the parents to explain to him how children are born. ...
8
votes
1answer
191 views
Kissing and Hugging one's wife
What does it say about chibuk and nishuk (kissing and hugging) shelo b'shas tashmish (not during relations) with one's wife in Sifrei Halacha or Hashkafa?
Among madrichei chassanim (those that teach ...
8
votes
3answers
184 views
Why was there a distinction made for women captives?
In Numbers 31, God tells the Israelites to wipe out the Midianites (and incidentally, Balaam) by killing every male. But they spared certain women (v17-18):
Now therefore kill every male among the ...
8
votes
1answer
113 views
Why is giluey arayos one of the big 3?
I get why murder and idol worship are things you have to give your life up for. But why is giluy arayos - sexual sin so fundamental as to require a person to give up one's life? I'm looking for a ...
8
votes
2answers
225 views
Why should one have marital relations as if forced by a demon?
The gemarah (nedarim 20b) mentions that one of the reasons for having beautiful children is due to having relations "as if forced by a demon". Rashi there explains the term as either indicating that ...
8
votes
1answer
75 views
mating prevention as Tza'ar Ba'alei Chayim
Does anyone know whether keeping an animal of one sex as a pet is considered Tza'ar Ba'alei Chayim or not, since it cannot mate?
7
votes
1answer
269 views
Viewing copulating animals
As a child at the zoo I was taught that one is not allowed to view animals while they are copulating. However as a pet owner I have learned that the exposed genitals of animals do not prohibit a ...
7
votes
1answer
391 views
Does casual sex establish a marriage?
Do premarital sexual relations effect Kiddushin (betrothal/first step of Jewish marriage) if there is no intention of getting married?
If so, is the physical act itself determinative of whether or ...
7
votes
3answers
793 views
Do JONAH and similar organizations successfully help those with same-gender attractions?
Wikipedia's article on homosexuality and Judaism talks about Jewish organizations which aim to help people change. The article mentions JONAH, an organization which works on "prevention, ...
6
votes
3answers
138 views
Misreading a k'suva
The k'suva text varies slightly depending on whether the bride is a virgin, independent of whether she has been married previously. (For one thing, the amount of money mentioned in it is different; ...
6
votes
2answers
191 views
May a woman look at a man for pleasure?
It's ossur for a man to look at a woman for pleasure. Even to look at her small finger with the intention of having pleasure from it (See EH"E Siman 21 Sif 1.)
Is there any prohibition for a woman to ...
6
votes
2answers
323 views
Why does the Talmud assume a woman cannot get pregnant on the first act of intercourse?
There is a rule in the Gemara (Yevamot 34a) that אין אשה מתעברת בביאה ראשונה. The question is why the Talmud assumes that a virgin cannot conceive on her first act of sexual intercourse if the hymen ...
5
votes
2answers
291 views
Origin of myth about the hole in the sheet?
There is a widespread myth (as far as I know it is a myth) that orthodox Jews must have marital relations through a hole in a sheet. What is the origin of this myth and does it have any actual basis ...
5
votes
1answer
161 views
Are cholim obligated to please their wives?
To me it is clear that if (G-d forbid) a person is sick to the point that it will kill them, or that (G-d forbid) they will get their wife sick, there's obviously no obligation to please their wife ...
5
votes
2answers
343 views
Sources for Hassidic views on marital celibacy/asceticism?
My understanding is the traditional view of Ger Hassidism was that marital celibacy was a good idea, once all procreative needs had been met.
My impression is that Chabad-Lubavitch never advocated an ...
5
votes
2answers
184 views
Why is age 3 the age at which a girl is able to have intercourse?
In msh210's answer to this question of mine, he stated that:
women...who physically could be [intimate with men], which is those who had reached their third birthday.
In comments, he mentioned ...
4
votes
4answers
555 views
What is the philosophy or logic for considering masturbation to be sinful?
There are a couple of questions, here and here, on this site mentioning masturbation. Both of them assume that masturbation is a sin and some of the answers cite specific texts backing that up. ...
4
votes
2answers
171 views
Yichud with someone who can't have an erection
If a man is in a physical situation where he is unable to have an erection will there still be an issur of yichud (the prohibition of being alone with someone that it is forbidden to have relations ...
4
votes
2answers
644 views
How do you quit a pornography habit?
Chabad rabbi Tzvi Freeman writes that all pornography is bad. If a man already has a habit of watching pornography, how do you quit?
4
votes
1answer
134 views
Source for story about The Rabbi and the prostitute
I learned a great Gemara about a rabbi who visited a famous prostitute. But before he consummated the deal, his tallitot slapped him on the face, reminding him of his faith.
Where's the story? Any ...
4
votes
1answer
101 views
Onah and Sukkos?
Does the Mitzvah of sleeping in the Sukkah supersede the mitzvah of Onah? (one would think not, as it is a chov to someone else.) If not, is one supposed to fulfill mitzvas Onah and then retire to the ...
4
votes
1answer
163 views
sperm donation and p'ru ur'vu
Does donating sperm to a woman who is not your wife (who then goes on to bear children from it) fulfill the mitzvah of p'ru ur'vu?
Alternatively, is it a violation of halakha? Does it matter whose ...
4
votes
1answer
120 views
Can a shul give an aliyah to an openly gay Jewish man when it gives aliyah to people who violate Shabbos?
In a Young Israel shul I've attended, the rabbi would not allow the gabbaim to give Jewish men an aliyah if there is reason to believe that the person is openly gay (and acts on his inclination), ...
3
votes
3answers
599 views
Homosexuality is “worse than murder”?
A sign at a recent rally protesting New York's 2011 Marriage Equality Act reads
Judaism considers male homosexuality a worse sin than murder
I imagine that this is a minority opinion, but does ...
3
votes
1answer
395 views
Are marital relations on Friday nights a “double mitzvah”?
An uncle of mine once told me that a rabbi told him that having marital relations on Friday nights is a "double mitzvah," presumably because one would be fulfilling both the obligation to have ...
3
votes
2answers
282 views
are homosexual relations forbidden by God? Why?
To my understanding, Bible says that God does not like homosexual relations. But why? Why did God punish and destroy inhabitants of Sodom and Gomorrah? They were not Jewish and were not given the laws ...
3
votes
2answers
111 views
Is there a Halacha that sons may not be present at the burial of their parents?
Is there a Halacha that sons may not be present at their parents' burial? I've heard that if the sons wasted seed (G-d forbid) negative forces are created which would be detrimental at the burial site ...
3
votes
2answers
109 views
How was Er considererd to be married to Tamar?
The gemarah (yevamos 34b) indicates that Er slept with Tamar sh'lo k'darka. If this is the case how was Er ever married to Tamar if the injunction of the pasuk וְדָבַק בְּאִשְׁתּוֹ (Bereshis 2:24) is ...
3
votes
1answer
217 views
When are you allowed to touch your (newly married) wife?
At what point is a man allowed to touch a woman that he has just married. Can they touch after he has placed the ring on her finger and said "harei at..." before the 7 blessings are completed? Are ...
3
votes
1answer
220 views
How did a virgin decide upon her marriage in Israel 2000 years ago?
About 2000 years ago in Israel, was a virgin free to choose her future husband (or even to decide whether to marry or not marry at all) or she was absolutely submitted to the will of her father?
3
votes
2answers
141 views
Did Yitzchak not Fulfill the Mitzvah of “Be Fruitful and Multiply”?
According to the understanding of many commentators "pru u'revu" (be fruitful and multiply) is a positive commandment which is not fulfilled unless a man has both a son and daughter as offspring. ...
3
votes
1answer
129 views
Mikvah and illness
Is there any reason to assume that a woman may or may not go to Mikvah when she has a non-life threatening illness that may be made worse by going (eg., flu, strep, ear infection)?
What if both she ...
3
votes
0answers
111 views
Maimonides on Circumcision
These are not questions about circumcision. They are about what Maimonides said about the practice.
I would to know if the following things do, or do not, in fact represent things Maimonides said ...
2
votes
2answers
275 views
How long is the required suspension of marital intimacy after childbirth?
How many days a must married couple refrain from intimacy after their baby is born?
2
votes
2answers
300 views
Pleasure of woman at the end of relations (source in Chazal?)
I heard that it says in chazal the woman only has pleasure at the end ("gamar bia") of tashmish (relations). Is there any source/citation for this?
2
votes
1answer
100 views
Why is the period of Shovavim connected to tikkun habris?
Please see this question and answers for background information.
What is the reason that the period of Shovavim is used to address tikkun habris (sexual sins)? Why is this time period auspicious for ...
2
votes
2answers
116 views
Was Lot, himself, sodomized when he first moved into Sodom?
In Genesis 19, Lot defends the angels who came under his roof against the demands of the local men who want a chance to sodomize the three visitors. From the Torah's description, and Rashi's take on ...
2
votes
1answer
56 views
Why is the son of אסנ״ת משגע״ח called a sinner?
The Bavli, N'darim 20:2, reads:
וברותי מכם המורדים והפושעים בי אמר רבי לוי אלו בני תשע מדות בני אסנ״ת משגע״ח בני אימה בני אנוסה בני שנואה בני נידוי בני תמורה בני מריבה בני שכרות בני גרושת הלב בני ...
2
votes
0answers
123 views
Masturbation Invalidating Status as a Witness
Is a man who masturbates invalidated as a witness? The Gemara in Sanhedrin (26b) states that prohibited sexual relations do invalidate his status as a witness, but I could not find any literature on ...
1
vote
2answers
655 views
Why does the Rambam (Maimonides) equate all sex outside marriage as prostitution?
Shalom told me about it in his answer to this question:
What does adultery mean in the 7th commandment?
That Si'naf in 7 commandments means only having sex with someone else' wife. However, judaism ...
1
vote
2answers
185 views
Does Judaism permit sexual relationships outside of marriage?
I am eager to know more about different religions from Islam to Judaism. Furthermore, how different religions look at women and comparing their kinds of approaches to the matter of gender and ...
