A halachic period of mourning after the passing of a close relative. There are many laws and customs relating to this period and those observing it.

learn more… | top users | synonyms

4
votes
2answers
195 views

What is the halachic source for the minhagim of mourning during Sefira?

What is the earliest halachic source for the minhagim of mourning during sefira? Note that this does not mean the story of R' Akiva, I'm talking about halachic references to prohibitions such as not ...
4
votes
2answers
63 views

Why were Yisrael allowed to mourn for the death of the two sons of Aharon, but not Aharon and his two remaining sons?

After the two sons of Aharon were killed by Hashem, it says in Vayikra 10:6 “ And Moses said to Aaron and to Eleazar and to Ithamar, his sons: Do not leave your heads unshorn and do not rend your ...
4
votes
1answer
77 views

Can an Onen receive an Aliyah?

By onen I mean someone who as lost their sibling, and they haven't been buried yet. Can an onen be called to the Torah as an Oleh? Can an onen read from the Torah?
4
votes
1answer
214 views

Kibus (Laundry) During the Nine Days

The reason brought by Rashi and quoted by poskim such as the Mishna Berurah as to why we do not do laundry during the nine days (or Sefardim, in the week that the Ninth of Av falls out in) is because ...
4
votes
2answers
95 views

Custom for a mourner to be chosen to read the haftora every week

The Chabad rabbi near me has the custom of taking (for himself) both the kaddish recitation after the Torah reading (when applicable) and the reading of the haftorah on Shabbat — specifically ...
4
votes
1answer
202 views

Tearing kriyah at the Kotel ha-Maaravi after visiting on Shabbat

Assume the following: We should tear kriyah at the Kotel ha-Maaravi (Western Wall) if we haven't been there in 30 days. We don't tear kriyah on shabbat. Now, answer this question: If I go to the ...
4
votes
2answers
155 views

Reasoning for doing/not doing mourning customs in second half of the omer

In my observation, most people observe certain mourning customs between the beginning of sefirat ha'omer and lag b'omer (such as refraining from shaving, listening to live music, etc.). Some people ...
4
votes
0answers
84 views

What constitutes a “Hesped” (eulogy)?

There are certain dates throughout the year when one may not give a "Hesped" (eulogy) because of a certain level of happiness associated with those dates. However, I've attended funerals conducted on ...
4
votes
0answers
75 views

Why read about Rashb"i's death at a memorial ceremony?

Why do many people read the passage (known as אדרא זוטא) from Zohar about the death of Rabbi Shim'on ben Yochai at memorial ceremonies? A description of it can be found here.
3
votes
2answers
119 views

What if there's a Minyan of Aveilim?

It is my understanding that when one is in the year of mourning following the death of certain relatives, he is not allowed to lead ["daven from the amud"] certain prayers (such as those on Shabbos, ...
3
votes
1answer
128 views

Wiping hands on Tisha b'Av

Since many authorities permit wiping the hands if one does not have water to wash with (when washing for bread), is one forbidden to wipe their hands on Tisha b'Av?
3
votes
1answer
61 views

Can a mourner/avel learn Torah on Shabbat?

If I'm not mistaken a mourner in the 1st 7 days, during the Shiva cannot study Torah (except for mourning-related Torah study) as it brings joy to a person. Firstly is this Halacha or a Minhag? ...
3
votes
1answer
132 views

Aveilus for an adoptive parent

Are there any dinim of aveilus for a child that was adopted when his adoptive parents pass away? Are there any poskim that spoke about this?
3
votes
1answer
2k views

Wishes to a mourner in addition to “Hamokom Yenachem Eschem”

I have heard some people say in Yiddish after "Hamokom Yenachem Eschem B'Soch Shaar Aveilei Tzion V'Yerushalayim" ("May God comfort you alongside the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem"), "Zulst Mer Nisht ...
3
votes
2answers
128 views

What is the source for lighting a candle for the whole year after the death of a close relative?

I am familiar with the idea of a yahrzeit candle. I have observed a custom of keeping a flame alight for the whole year (or maybe 11 months) after the death of a close relative. (When one goes out, ...
3
votes
1answer
82 views

Aveilus and Davening from the Omud on Rosh Hashana / Yom Kippur?

Can a Ba'al tefillah in his year of aveilus daven from the Omud on Rosh Hashana / Yom Kippur?
3
votes
1answer
83 views

Saying goodbye on Tisha B'Av

On Tisha B'Av, the custom is to refrain from greeting people. Even a brief "hello" is to be avoided if possible. Does the same restriction apply to saying "good-bye"? Or is that not considered a ...
3
votes
1answer
79 views

Using laundered underwear, bed sheets and towels during the nine days

If underwear, bed sheets, or towels were laundered during the 9 days, is it permissible to benefit from (wear or use) them during the 9 days?
3
votes
2answers
78 views

Keria at the Wailing Wall

I believe the Halacha is that you're supposed to tear your clothes when seeing the Wailing Wall, just as one does when 'sitting Shiva'. Why don't most people?
3
votes
1answer
115 views

Should an adoptee mourn his Jewish biological parents?

I was adopted at birth from a Jewish biological mother into a Jewish adoptive family. Should I observe mourning for my birth mother when she dies, and otherwise honor her as a parent? Thank you.
3
votes
1answer
101 views

Can one switch chazzanim at non-traditional places in the service to accommodate a mourner who came late?

Can one switch chazzanim at non-traditional places in the service to accomodate a mourner who came late? For example, Reuven is asked to lead the prayers (say mincha). He says “Ashrei”, “Kaddish” and ...
3
votes
1answer
180 views

Splitting Sefira Mourning Practices According to Rav Moshe Feinstein

People hold of the restrictions of the seven-week omer period (shaving and listening to music, for example) at various times: some hold approximately the first five weeks; others, approximately the ...
3
votes
0answers
43 views

When and why would one don sackcloth?

There are various instances in tanach of someone donning sackcloth. I would like to know whether any commentators have compiled an outline as to when and why someone would don sackcloth (is it only ...
3
votes
0answers
113 views

Should I rend k'riyah if I witness the death of a non-relative? If so, what's the procedure?

In another question, Chalutznahal cites Yoreh De'ah 40:5, which says that when I witness a fellow Jew die, I must rend my shirt out of sadness. And British Rabbi Dr. Moshe Freedman brings this down as ...
3
votes
0answers
49 views

Best practices for long-distance Nihum Aveilim and Kavod HaMeith

What are some best practices for people who learn from afar of the passing of an individual (not immediate family) and who want show their respects to the deceased and the surviving family? If they ...
3
votes
0answers
247 views

Kaddish for non-blood relatives

Does one say kaddish for a non-blood relative such as (chas v'shalom) a daughter-in-law? I know that a husband says kaddish when the parent of his wife passes away, but my understanding is that this ...
2
votes
1answer
112 views

Can you go to a shul dinner if you are in aveilus?

Can you go to a shul dinner or other formal function that is for social convention and not actually enjoyable if you are in aveilus?
2
votes
3answers
616 views

Shave/Haircuts during the 3 weeks

What are the reasons why a person may be able shave and/or haircut (two biiiits!- sorry, just had to) during the three weeks? Please use sources.
2
votes
1answer
228 views

Sitting on a toilet during Tisha B'Av

May one sit on a toilet during Tisha B'Av? Are there any requirements that he hurry up as much as possible?
2
votes
1answer
204 views

Halachos of an Aveil with Mishloach Manos

The Rama in Orach Chaim 696:6 says we do not send Misloach Manos to an Aveil (mourner). The way people send is to send it to the family, rather than directly to the Aveil. If you do not know anyone ...
2
votes
1answer
79 views

Wait to be told one's unkempt after 9 Av?

I have heard (from people for whom it's been relevant) that someone who may not shave or cut his hair because he is in mourning for a relative, and whose period of mourning ends, nonetheless waits to ...
2
votes
2answers
76 views

What is the purpose of the laws of mourning?

There are generally accepted laws and customs regarding a mourner, whether mourning for a relative or for the tragedy of the destruction of the bais hamikdash. Examples include restriction from ...
2
votes
1answer
124 views

Is it permissible to shave for business purposes after Shiva but during shloshim?

Is one allowed to shave after shiva (7 days of mourning for deceased) if one is concerned about seeing clients at work? Most authorities say that one should wait 30 days before shaving.
2
votes
1answer
104 views

The power of a seudat mitzvah to obviate minhagei aveilus

The prohibitions which Ashkenazim take on themselves during the nine days seem to spring from post-Talmudic thinking and application of the notion of "reduced joy." For some reason, the particulars ...
2
votes
1answer
184 views

Mourning Greetings

The Shulchan Aruch in Yoreh Deah Siman 385 outlines the prohibition regarding "Sheilat Shalom" (greeting with peace) to a mourner. Does this prohibition include such terms as "Hello" "Good morning" ...
2
votes
1answer
28 views

What is Ruaḥ HaShem?

When recalling someone who has passed (in a shi'ur or Devar Torah), I have heard many say "Ruaḥ HaShem teniḥenu/ah beGan 'Eden" (רוח ה' תניחנו/ה בגן עדן). 1) What is "Ruaḥ HaShem" (literally, the ...
2
votes
0answers
15 views

Eicha 2:5 Targum - seemingly out of order

Eicha 2:5 Targum translates תאניה ואניה as אבילותא ואנינותא. Does not Aninus come before Aveilus? How can this targum be explained?
2
votes
0answers
100 views

Use of a commoner's talis to read the Torah on

Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chayim 153:21: אין לקנות מעילים שנשתמש בהם הדיוט לתשמיש קדושה One must not purchase for holy use garments that a commoner used. "Holy use" here includes use as the ...
2
votes
0answers
900 views

How long does one say Kaddish for a sibling?

There is discussion here about saying Kaddish for parents and also some discussion on Kaddish for a sister. One place on the Chabad website states that Kaddish should be said for 30 days for a sibling ...
2
votes
1answer
149 views

Does one mourn during the days following Shavuot?

We say the four verses starting "Yehi Shem" (instead of Tachanun) after Shavuot because of the bringing of the Korbanot. Does this have any impact on mourning after Shavuot?
1
vote
2answers
198 views

Feelings of mourning during Sefirat Haomer

Between Passover until Shavout, the Torah tells us to count seven weeks. The Rabbis added to this saying that because 24,000 students of Rabbi Akiva died during these seven weeks, we spend the ...
1
vote
1answer
414 views

Movies and music during the 3 weeks according to Rav Soloveitchik

The Rav compares the 3 weeks to the twelve months of mourning, and following that comparison he permits shaving during the 3 weeks (but not the 9 days) but forbids large social gatherings. What does ...
1
vote
1answer
79 views

What types of hair - and whose hair - are included in mourning-related hair-cutting prohibitions?

When there are hair-cutting prohibitions (or restrictions) for mourning-related practices, what types of hair are included? Is it just hair on the top of one's head and/or facial hair? Do the ...
1
vote
1answer
260 views

Dancing on Yom Haatzmaus

One is not allowed to dance during the mourning days of s'firas haomer (Mishna B'rura 493:3). According to all major customs, Yom Haatzmaus (Israel's independence day) falls during the mourning days ...
1
vote
2answers
299 views

May one have a torah aliyah during the mourning period

Is it okay to have a torah aliyah during the 11 month mourning period, or should one wait?
1
vote
1answer
138 views

Restrictions of sefirah during Nisan?

It seems that, since mourning is prohibited during the month of Nisan, one could not observe the restrictions of sefirah until the end of Rosh Chodesh Iyar, since one is also not permitted to mourn on ...
1
vote
1answer
97 views

Ripping garments when hearing Hashem's name?

I've heard in a kabbalah shiur on web yeshiva, if someone says Hashem's name as it's written, either b'shogeg or b'meizid, the person or people that heard must rip their garments as they do when a ...
1
vote
1answer
76 views

Avel that needs shmira — Also on Shabbos?

That which we say an Avel (person in mourning) is among the people that need "shmirah" (Someone to be with them - See Gemorah Brachos 54b at the bottom) is this also on Shabbos? Normally we say that ...
1
vote
0answers
58 views

Is an observant Jew allowed to visit a Christian cemetery?

If a Jew wishes to visit a grave at a Christian cemetery (say the grave of a patrilinial grandparent), is it permissible? Does it matter if it is a mostly unadorned cemetery vs. one with pictures of ...
1
vote
0answers
23 views

Is aninus more lenient than Aveilus?

I was under the impression that the further time passes from death the weaker the Aveilus. For example, Shiva is stronger than Sheloshim is stronger than 11 months. Yet, according to the Gemara in ...