A halachic period of mourning after the passing of a close relative. There are many laws and customs relating to this period and those observing it.

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Saying “HaMakom yenachem…” multiple times

Does one say "HaMakom yenachem..." each time one visits/leaves a shiva house or only once during the shiva period? I recall someone telling me one only says it once, but I cannot find any source for ...
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0answers
76 views

Why read about Rashb"i's death at a memorial ceremony?

Why do many people read the passage (known as אדרא זוטא) from Zohar about the death of Rabbi Shim'on ben Yochai at memorial ceremonies? A description of it can be found here.
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2answers
115 views

Do mourners change their seats in shul today?

The g'mara on Moed Katan 23a says that after shiva, when the mourner stays at home, he can return to shul but does not sit in his usual seat. (According to this g'mara, he returns to his usual seat a ...
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35 views

Source that Aveilim circle the block when the Shiva ends [duplicate]

What is the source the an Aveil circles the block on the seventh day, once the Shiva is up?
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1answer
136 views

Using laundered underwear, bed sheets and towels during the nine days

If underwear, bed sheets, or towels were laundered during the 9 days, is it permissible to benefit from (wear or use) them during the 9 days?
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3answers
169 views

Prohibition to wear black for mourning?

I've heard a rumor floating around to the effect that Jews should not wear all black as an expression of mourning. Is there anything to that? If so, is there anything inherently wrong with it, is it a ...
25
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3answers
581 views

Placing stones on a grave

My office is situated right next to a Jewish cemetery. A coworker, noticing the yarmulke on my head, asked me why he sometimes sees stones placed on some of the gravestones. I told him that as far as ...
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109 views

What constitutes a “Hesped” (eulogy)?

There are certain dates throughout the year when one may not give a "Hesped" (eulogy) because of a certain level of happiness associated with those dates. However, I've attended funerals conducted on ...
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2answers
161 views

Reasoning for doing/not doing mourning customs in second half of the omer

In my observation, most people observe certain mourning customs between the beginning of sefirat ha'omer and lag b'omer (such as refraining from shaving, listening to live music, etc.). Some people ...
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2answers
124 views

Keria at the Wailing Wall

I believe the Halacha is that you're supposed to tear your clothes when seeing the Wailing Wall, just as one does when 'sitting Shiva'. Why don't most people?
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104 views
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101 views

What types of hair - and whose hair - are included in mourning-related hair-cutting prohibitions?

When there are hair-cutting prohibitions (or restrictions) for mourning-related practices, what types of hair are included? Is it just hair on the top of one's head and/or facial hair? Do the ...
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0answers
196 views

What's considered shaving?

During periods of mourning, such as Sefirat Haomer and the three weeks prior to Tisha B'av, shaving is prohibited. What is considered shaving and what is allowed? May you pluck out a few hairs here ...
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1answer
122 views

Should an adoptee mourn his Jewish biological parents?

I was adopted at birth from a Jewish biological mother into a Jewish adoptive family. Should I observe mourning for my birth mother when she dies, and otherwise honor her as a parent? Thank you.
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2answers
68 views

Why were Yisrael allowed to mourn for the death of the two sons of Aharon, but not Aharon and his two remaining sons?

After the two sons of Aharon were killed by Hashem, it says in Vayikra 10:6 “ And Moses said to Aaron and to Eleazar and to Ithamar, his sons: Do not leave your heads unshorn and do not rend your ...
2
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1answer
231 views

Halachos of an Aveil with Mishloach Manos

The Rama in Orach Chaim 696:6 says we do not send Misloach Manos to an Aveil (mourner). The way people send is to send it to the family, rather than directly to the Aveil. If you do not know anyone ...
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1answer
350 views

Twelve Months of Mourning During a Leap Year

For those who are mourning a parent for the requisite twelve-month aveilus, would Adar 1 and Adar 2 count as two separate months towards the twelve? Or does one year mean a full year, i.e., from ...
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2answers
200 views

Why are different kaddishes said by different people?

The "Mourners' Kaddish" and the "Rabbis' Kaddish" are said by mourners: either all instances are said by all mourners in the synagogue simultaneously, or each mourner gets a turn at one kaddish, or ...
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1answer
113 views

Ripping garments when hearing Hashem's name?

I've heard in a kabbalah shiur on web yeshiva, if someone says Hashem's name as it's written, either b'shogeg or b'meizid, the person or people that heard must rip their garments as they do when a ...
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2answers
555 views

Does one sit shiva for someone he killed?

I understand sitting shiva to be an expression of bereavement. If I (hypothetically) was the victim of constant abuse which lasted for years and I ultimately, in an act of self defense, had to kill my ...
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67 views

When and why would one don sackcloth?

There are various instances in tanach of someone donning sackcloth. I would like to know whether any commentators have compiled an outline as to when and why someone would don sackcloth (is it only ...
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2answers
114 views

Where can I find the Rav's hesped for R Chaim Ozer Grodzinsky?

I am looking for the text (in Hebrew) of R' JB Soloveitchik's hesped for R' Chaim Ozer Grozhinsky, unofficially titled "HaTzitz vehaChoshen" which was written before RJBS broke away from Agudah.
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1answer
162 views

Does one mourn during the days following Shavuot?

We say the four verses starting "Yehi Shem" (instead of Tachanun) after Shavuot because of the bringing of the Korbanot. Does this have any impact on mourning after Shavuot?
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1answer
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Why do mourning practices surrounding suicide differ from Shulchan Aruch?

It used to be that a person who committed suicide was buried in a separate part of the cemetery and the relatives did not sit shiva (see Shulchan Aruch YD 345). We no longer do these things and we ...
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102 views

Does מין mean Christian, and if so what are the implications?

From what I have read there seems to be ample evidence that the term מין, as used in several places in the talmud, refers to Christians. I would like to know if there are any authorities who cite this ...
2
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1answer
84 views

Wait to be told one's unkempt after 9 Av?

I have heard (from people for whom it's been relevant) that someone who may not shave or cut his hair because he is in mourning for a relative, and whose period of mourning ends, nonetheless waits to ...
3
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1answer
106 views

Saying goodbye on Tisha B'Av

On Tisha B'Av, the custom is to refrain from greeting people. Even a brief "hello" is to be avoided if possible. Does the same restriction apply to saying "good-bye"? Or is that not considered a ...
6
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1answer
666 views

Staying to enjoy the unexpected playing of recorded music during the 3 weeks/9 days

Assuming for a moment that one holds that the prohibition of listening to music during the Three Weeks / Nine Days applies to recorded music, if one were in a store that had music playing on the ...
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105 views

“I was waiting for my flight and a concert broke out.”

We've all heard that joke, right? In all seriousness, though, a friend posted this video of an impromptu concert at Toronto Pearson International Airport yesterday as all flights were either delayed ...
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1answer
664 views

Movies and music during the 3 weeks according to Rav Soloveitchik

The Rav compares the 3 weeks to the twelve months of mourning, and following that comparison he permits shaving during the 3 weeks (but not the 9 days) but forbids large social gatherings. What does ...
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119 views

Should I rend k'riyah if I witness the death of a non-relative? If so, what's the procedure?

In another question, Chalutznahal cites Yoreh De'ah 40:5, which says that when I witness a fellow Jew die, I must rend my shirt out of sadness. And British Rabbi Dr. Moshe Freedman brings this down as ...
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44 views

Is it always a good idea to say an extra Shema' if you missed one?

According to Double AA's answer on a related question, "it can't hurt" to say an extra Shema' later if you missed the Zeman (set time) for it. While it may be true to a certain extent that saying ...
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1answer
73 views

Talmid that is an Avel going to a wedding of his Rebbe

I had heard once that there is a Teshuvas Ranach that says it's muter for a student that is an avel (in the year of mourning) to go to a wedding that his Rebbe is making for one his children. I ...
4
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1answer
224 views

Tearing keriyah for ladies mourning in public

Is it considered to be "un-tznius" (immodest) for ladies to tear keriyah (rip their clothes in mourning) in public?
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88 views

Protocol/requirements for repeat visits to a Shiv'ah house

What are the Protocol/requirements for repeat visits to a Shiv'ah house? Are there any formalities that can be set aside (letting them speak first, sitting with them, as opposed to chatting by the ...
3
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1answer
107 views

Can one switch chazzanim at non-traditional places in the service to accommodate a mourner who came late?

Can one switch chazzanim at non-traditional places in the service to accomodate a mourner who came late? For example, Reuven is asked to lead the prayers (say mincha). He says “Ashrei”, “Kaddish” and ...
3
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1answer
157 views

Aveilus for an adoptive parent

Are there any dinim of aveilus for a child that was adopted when his adoptive parents pass away? Are there any poskim that spoke about this?
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1answer
126 views

Can you go to a shul dinner if you are in aveilus?

Can you go to a shul dinner or other formal function that is for social convention and not actually enjoyable if you are in aveilus?
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3answers
298 views

Must EMTs and others rend Kriyah each time they see a patient die?

I was looking at Yoreh De'ah 40:5 (יו"ד סימן ש"מ ס"ק ה) and Moed Katan 25b (כה עמוד ב), which require Kriyah (garment-rending) for all who are there at the time of death. It would seem to me that an ...
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0answers
52 views

Best practices for long-distance Nihum Aveilim and Kavod HaMeith

What are some best practices for people who learn from afar of the passing of an individual (not immediate family) and who want show their respects to the deceased and the surviving family? If they ...
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1answer
769 views

How to Tear Kriyah

What is the proper procedure for tearing Kriyah (e.g. for Aveilus* or visiting the Kosel)? * May we never have to do so
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1answer
81 views

Avel that needs shmira — Also on Shabbos?

That which we say an Avel (person in mourning) is among the people that need "shmirah" (Someone to be with them - See Gemorah Brachos 54b at the bottom) is this also on Shabbos? Normally we say that ...
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5answers
82 views

In Kaddish — what consolation can we offer G-d?

In the Kaddish, we say that may G-d be praised "beyond any blessing, hymn, praise, and consolation said in this world." I understand how we can bless or praise G-d -- but how exactly (or even ...
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46 views

How to conjugate “their resting place(s)” in Kel Malei Rachamim?

The memorial prayer Kel Malei Rachamim concludes "may they rest in peace in their resting place[s], and let us say Amen." Okay, how to say "resting place[s]." Mishkavam? Mishkaveihem? Mishkevoseihem? ...
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106 views

Use of a commoner's talis to read the Torah on

Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chayim 153:21: אין לקנות מעילים שנשתמש בהם הדיוט לתשמיש קדושה One must not purchase for holy use garments that a commoner used. "Holy use" here includes use as the ...
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2answers
437 views

May one have a torah aliyah during the mourning period

Is it okay to have a torah aliyah during the 11 month mourning period, or should one wait?
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2k views

Meat on Rosh Chodesh of 9 days

Why is The reasoning that Sefardim do eat on Rosh Chodesh and Ashkinazim do not? Sefardim http://www.dailyhalacha.com/displayRead.asp?readID=950&txtSearch=meat 9 days Ashkenazim ...
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385 views

How obligated is one to say Kaddish for a deceased relative?

People often talk about an obligation -- Chiyuv -- to recite Kaddish at every opportunity for some time after the death of a relative. (Which relatives are obligated and for how long does not seem ...
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342 views

Kaddish for non-blood relatives

Does one say kaddish for a non-blood relative such as (chas v'shalom) a daughter-in-law? I know that a husband says kaddish when the parent of his wife passes away, but my understanding is that this ...
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1k views

How long does one say Kaddish for a sibling?

There is discussion here about saying Kaddish for parents and also some discussion on Kaddish for a sister. One place on the Chabad website states that Kaddish should be said for 30 days for a sibling ...