A halachic period of mourning after the passing of a close relative. There are many laws and customs relating to this period and those observing it.
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296 views
Placing stones on a grave
My office is situated right next to a Jewish cemetery. A coworker, noticing the yarmulke on my head, asked me why he sometimes sees stones placed on some of the gravestones. I told him that as far as ...
14
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3answers
192 views
Must EMTs and others rend Kriyah each time they see a patient die?
I was looking at Yoreh De'ah 40:5 (יו"ד סימן ש"מ ס"ק ה) and Moed Katan 25b (כה עמוד ב), which require Kriyah (garment-rending) for all who are there at the time of death. It would seem to me that an ...
12
votes
2answers
911 views
Proper recitation of Hamakom Yenachem
Is the proper phrase to console a mourner always the plural המקום ינחם אתכם בתוך שאר אבלי ציון וירושלים or should it be changed depending on whom it is said to (singluar, feminine, etc.)?
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4answers
207 views
What is the best way to visualize the Churban Bais HaMikdash?
It is now thousands of years since the Churban Bais HaMikdash. Many jews feel very comfortable in their surroundings. What is the best way for a person to visiualize the great loss of the Bais ...
9
votes
1answer
110 views
Do we say “shabbat shalom” on Tisha b'Av that falls on Shabbat?
Yesterday I said "shabbat shalom" to someone and he said we don't do that on Tisha b'Av that falls on Shabbat. I thought that Shabbat trumps the day (and that's why we move the other observances). ...
8
votes
2answers
137 views
When there are four aveilim (mourners), Is it better to have one minyan of 40 people or 4 minyonim of ten each?
Today I was in a shul where there were four parallel mincha services because four mourners wanted to lead the services. I thought there was a principle of ברב עם הדרת מלך?
What sources are there that ...
8
votes
2answers
140 views
Mundane activities on Tisha B'Av
Tisha B'Av should be spent focusing on the destruction of Jerusalem and Beit haMikdash; but is it permissible to do daily chores as well? For example, this year, Tisha B'Av is postponed one day ...
8
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3answers
260 views
Meat on Rosh Chodesh of 9 days
Why is The reasoning that Sefardim do eat on Rosh Chodesh and Ashkinazim do not?
Sefardim
http://www.dailyhalacha.com/displayRead.asp?readID=950&txtSearch=meat 9 days
Ashkenazim
...
7
votes
3answers
497 views
Why do we comfort a mourner with Hamakom Yenachem Eschem?
Why, when comforting a mourner at the completion of a Shiva visit, do we refer to G-d as Hamakom? We say Hamakom Yanachem Eschem - why not Hashem Yenachem or Elokim Yenachem?
7
votes
2answers
655 views
If someone needs to shave during Sefirah or Three Weeks because of work, should he also shave before Shabbos?
If someone needs to shave during Sefirah or Three Weeks because of work, should he also shave before Shabbos?
It seems strange to shave for M-F, but to go into Shabbos with stubble. On the other ...
7
votes
1answer
75 views
leaving something out of a meal zecher lachurban
As described in משנה ברורה ס׳ תקס ס״ק ה–ו–ז, we omit something from any big meal (not on Shabas or yom tov), noticeably, as a זכר לחרבן. Has anyone seen this done, and, if so, what was omitted? I'm ...
7
votes
1answer
157 views
When do the restrictions of 3 weeks start when 17 Tammuz is on Shabbos?
When do the restrictions of 3 weeks start when 17 Tammuz is on Shabbos (e.g. this year)?
Do they start motzei shabbos (already 18 Tammuz), since the 17 Tammuz is technically on shabbos or do they ...
7
votes
1answer
81 views
Counting Sheloshim for a chol hamoed death
How long is the shloshim observed for a death which occurs during chol hamoed Pesach? Does one observe a full thirty days started from the funeral or is it shortened because of the chag?
7
votes
1answer
163 views
Don't pass bread hand to hand: whose hand?
Shulchan Aruch (OC 167:18) says (in my own translation):
The one who slices the loaf of bread places a slice before each person. The individual then takes the slice with his hand. The one who ...
6
votes
2answers
585 views
shiduch date haircut during sefira
Are you allowed to get a haircut during the Omer if you are going on a shiduch date?
6
votes
1answer
301 views
What are the halachot of suicide?
It used to be that a person who committed suicide was buried in a separate part of the cemetery and the relatives did not sit shiva (see Shulchan Aruch YD 345). We no longer do these things and we ...
6
votes
1answer
79 views
Shalom Aleichem in Kiddush Levana to an Aveil
We do not say Shalom Aleichem to a Aveil. What about saying Shalom Aleichem to an Aveil (after the Shiva, during the year of Aveilus) during Kiddush Levana - do you or do you not? (sources please)
6
votes
2answers
114 views
Why are different kaddishes said by different people?
The "Mourners' Kaddish" and the "Rabbis' Kaddish" are said by mourners: either all instances are said by all mourners in the synagogue simultaneously, or each mourner gets a turn at one kaddish, or ...
6
votes
1answer
286 views
How to Tear Kriyah
What is the proper procedure for tearing Kriyah (e.g. for Aveilus* or visiting the Kosel)?
* May we never have to do so
6
votes
1answer
152 views
Does one sit shiva for someone he killed?
I understand sitting shiva to be an expression of bereavement. If I (hypothetically) was the victim of constant abuse which lasted for years and I ultimately, in an act of self defense, had to kill my ...
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votes
0answers
127 views
Can a convert mourn for their Jewish parents?
Consider someone who was born to a jewish father and non jewish mother who then converted to Judaism with his mother. It seems pashut from the Shulchan Aruch that one who converts is considered a ...
6
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0answers
66 views
Onen and Meis Mitzvah
If an onen comes across a mas mitzvah (let's assume there is either another person to be involved with the onen's personal mas or there is more time to be involved with his mas later), is the onen ...
5
votes
2answers
72 views
Special Grace After Meals in a House of Mourning
The Shulchan Aruch in Yoreh De'ah 379 outlines a special version of Bentching to be recited in a House of Mourning. I have been in several houses of mourning and have never seen this done. Has anyone ...
5
votes
1answer
56 views
Does a child tear Kriyah at the Kosel?
Does a kid under Bar/Bas Mitzva have to tear Kriya when they go to the Kosel?
5
votes
1answer
61 views
Reciting Boruch Dayan HaEmes on Shabbos
If someone's parent dies, one must recite Boruch Dayan HaEmes. What happens if this occurs on Shabbos? Is the customary Boruch Dayan HaEmes recited or not?
5
votes
1answer
119 views
Gifts for an Aveil
The Halacha is that Mishloach Manos is not sent to an Aveil. Suppose a close relative is in Aveilus, can you send them flowers for their birthday? (Sources please)
5
votes
1answer
135 views
Twelve Months of Mourning During a Leap Year
For those who are mourning a parent for the requisite twelve-month aveilus, would Adar 1 and Adar 2 count as two separate months towards the twelve? Or does one year mean a full year, i.e., from ...
5
votes
1answer
74 views
Haircuts on Friday when the 47th of the omer falls on Sunday
The Rema, commenting on the mourning of the first 33 days of the omer, allows haircuts on Friday, lichvod shabbos, when the 33rd falls on Sunday.
Does the same reasoning apply when the 47th falls on ...
5
votes
1answer
173 views
5
votes
2answers
55 views
In Kaddish — what consolation can we offer G-d?
In the Kaddish, we say that may G-d be praised "beyond any blessing, hymn, praise, and consolation said in this world."
I understand how we can bless or praise G-d -- but how exactly (or even ...
5
votes
1answer
91 views
When do Sefardim start mourning in a year that Tisha B'av is postponed until Sunday?
As mentioned here, Sefardim observe the mourning period known to Ashkenazim as "The Nine Days" only during the week that Tisha B'av occurs.
Tisha B'av falls out on Shabbat this year (5772), and the ...
5
votes
3answers
323 views
Taking a Shower during the Nine-Days
What are the parameters for taking a shower during the 9-day period between Rosh Chodesh Av and Tisha Bav? Namely:
When is one allowed to?
When doing so what water temperature should it be set on?
...
5
votes
0answers
60 views
Protocol/requirements for repeat visits to a Shiv'ah house
What are the Protocol/requirements for repeat visits to a Shiv'ah house?
Are there any formalities that can be set aside (letting them speak first, sitting with them, as opposed to chatting by the ...
4
votes
1answer
157 views
Tearing keriyah for ladies mourning in public
Is it considered to be "un-tznius" (immodest) for ladies to tear keriyah (rip their clothes in mourning) in public?
4
votes
3answers
219 views
Is Kel Malei Rachamim (memorial prayer) said under the chuppah at a wedding?
I'd seen a book on wedding practices and customs that said if desired in appropriate cases, a memorial prayer ("El/Kel Malei Rachamim") could be said under the chuppah, e.g. a bride/groom who lost a ...
4
votes
1answer
142 views
9 be-Av on Shabbos
When 9 be-Av falls on Shabbos, it is moved to the following Sunday.
Are there any restrictions on Shabbos because of 9 be-Av (maybe tashmish is forbidden)?
4
votes
2answers
124 views
What is the halachic source for the minhagim of mourning during Sefira?
What is the earliest halachic source for the minhagim of mourning during sefira? Note that this does not mean the story of R' Akiva, I'm talking about halachic references to prohibitions such as not ...
4
votes
1answer
65 views
Can an Onen receive an Aliyah?
By onen I mean someone who as lost their sibling, and they haven't been buried yet.
Can an onen be called to the Torah as an Oleh? Can an onen read from the Torah?
4
votes
1answer
158 views
Kibus (Laundry) During the Nine Days
The reason brought by Rashi and quoted by poskim such as the Mishna Berurah as to why we do not do laundry during the nine days (or Sefardim, in the week that the Ninth of Av falls out in) is because ...
4
votes
1answer
104 views
Tearing kriyah at the Kotel ha-Maaravi after visiting on Shabbat
Assume the following:
We should tear kriyah at the Kotel ha-Maaravi (Western Wall) if we haven't been there in 30 days.
We don't tear kriyah on shabbat.
Now, answer this question: If I go to the ...
4
votes
1answer
263 views
Enjoying music during the 3 weeks/9days
Assuming for a moment that one holds that the prohibition of listening to music during the Three Weeks / Nine Days applies to recorded music, if one were in a store that had music playing on the ...
3
votes
2answers
88 views
What if there's a Minyan of Aveilim?
It is my understanding that when one is in the year of mourning following the death of certain relatives, he is not allowed to lead ["daven from the amud"] certain prayers (such as those on Shabbos, ...
3
votes
1answer
64 views
Wiping hands on Tisha b'Av
Since many authorities permit wiping the hands if one does not have water to wash with, is one forbidden to wipe their hands on Tisha b'Av?
3
votes
1answer
60 views
Aveilus for an adoptive parent
Are there any dinim of aveilus for a child that was adopted when his adoptive parents pass away? Are there any poskim that spoke about this?
3
votes
1answer
823 views
Wishes to a mourner in addition to “Hamokom Yenachem Eschem”
I have heard some people say in Yiddish after "Hamokom Yenachem Eschem B'Soch Shaar Aveilei Tzion V'Yerushalayim" ("May God comfort you alongside the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem"), "Zulst Mer Nisht ...
3
votes
2answers
64 views
What is the source for lighting a candle for the whole year after the death of a close relative?
I am familiar with the idea of a yahrzeit candle.
I have observed a custom of keeping a flame alight for the whole year (or maybe 11 months) after the death of a close relative. (When one goes out, ...
3
votes
1answer
68 views
Can one switch chazzanim at non-traditional places in the service to accommodate a mourner who came late?
Can one switch chazzanim at non-traditional places in the service to accomodate a mourner who came late? For example, Reuven is asked to lead the prayers (say mincha). He says “Ashrei”, “Kaddish” and ...
3
votes
1answer
134 views
Splitting Sefira Mourning Practices According to Rav Moshe Feinstein
People hold of the restrictions of the seven-week omer period (shaving and listening to music, for example) at various times: some hold approximately the first five weeks; others, approximately the ...
3
votes
1answer
55 views
Reasoning for doing/not doing mourning customs in second half of the omer
In my observation, most people observe certain mourning customs between the beginning of sefirat ha'omer and lag b'omer (such as refraining from shaving, listening to live music, etc.). Some people ...
3
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0answers
38 views
Best practices for long-distance Nihum Aveilim and Kavod HaMeith
What are some best practices for people who learn from afar of the passing of an individual (not immediate family) and who want show their respects to the deceased and the surviving family?
If they ...
