There's a shiur on yutorah citing a responsum whether a grown child can pester his parents for money. The halacha is that once a child is old enough to go out on their own (I believe the Israeli rabbinic courts will put that at 15 or 16), the parent has no hard-and-fast obligation to support them anymore, though continued support for their spiritual growth is considered meritorious (and counts towards charity tithes). It is appropriate for a father to offer some kind of dowry so his daughter is more likely to get married, but that's a different discussion. Thus the parents have no obligation to fund a grown child, so it's a violation of Halacha to emotionally pain your parents by pestering them.
What happens today has nothing to do with halacha. The sad truth is, who doesn't want to see their daughters happy/married/happily married? And well, in a certain world in Israel, many guys won't consider your daughter unless you can buy him an apartment.
I've heard that the Gerrer Rebbe, showing fiscal leadership, has banned young couples from moving into apartments in the most expensive neighborhoods of Jerusalem and Bnei Brak, they need to start out in cheaper places; even if this couple could legitimately afford it, then the next couple could almost afford it, and before you know it, that's become the norm and expectation to which everyone is pushed.
Unsurprisingly, in communities where people are working for a living, there's less need (and therefore less pressure) for the parents' buying an apartment; additionally, in communities where singles meet on their own, Baruch Hashem men and women meet and decide they like each other and want to get married, instead of holding anyone's lives up for ransom via complicated monetary arrangements.
I've also heard (and again this is hearsay, pardon me if my language is strong here) that the Hassidic community in Israel has generally fared better in openness towards working for a living than the Ultra-Orthodox "Lithuanian" community. The former understands it's a movement for the masses; the latter is still putting everyone through the grinder, trying to produce a handful of super-great scholars.