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The halacha (Rambam Hilchos Tshuvah 2:9) mentions the difference between tshuvah on Yom Kippur regarding sinning between man and man, and man and HaShem.

The middle of the halacha states even if one hurt someone through words he needs to (לפייסו ולפגע) appease him and approach him until he forgives him. Shouldn't the order be approach him and then appease him? If one has to do it himself (as the Bach Orach Chaim 606 says) what does the Rambam's wording imply, unless he holds he can send someone first, before approaching the other party himself?

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1 Answer 1

Rabbi Perlstein elaborates on this Rambam, and the way he reads it is that the Rambam is saying first לפייסו is the sinner directly with the wronged party.

Then there is an additional obligation to reach out through three different groups of people that they should try to convince the wronged party to forgive the sinner. This is called לפגע.

So the first time (or more) is directly. When that fails, the person tries three times with different intermediaries, and then has no further obligation.

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