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In a discussion on a social media website, one of my parents has expressed a opinion I consider sexist. Feminist principle dictates that I publicly express my disapproval of this, and post a response indicating why I think their opinion is hazardous to gender equality. But the commandment to "honor thy father and mother" seems to indicate that I should not publicly make any remarks that could potentially shame one of my parents.

What should I do?

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Respectfully.... –  Shmuel Brin Jun 30 at 17:04
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Honor thy father and mother means to not publicly contradict them as well. Maybe you can express your opinion without referencing or responding to theirs or calling them out as subjects of disagreement. Since what was advocated is also a Torah prohibition, there are specific ways to correct that which are respectful to parents (and thus mitigate against the not-contradicting). Hopefully someone with more time will provide you with a sourced and detailed answer. (NOTE: Also expect a moderator to insist on making this question less specific and personal in keeping with the site guidelines). –  Yishai Jun 30 at 17:04
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If you can explain why you have to say something publicly, it might help your question. –  Charles Koppelman Jun 30 at 17:52
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Welcome to Mi Yodeya, user6659. Please note that, like Wikipedia, this site makes no guarantee of validity, and does not offer professional (particularly rabbinic) advice. Treat information from this site like it came from a crowd of your friends. Also, might I suggest you register your account? That will give you access to more of the site's features. –  msh210 Jun 30 at 18:05
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@msh210, I'm not asking whether Judaism or feminism has priority; I'm asking about how to reconcile the two. –  user6659 Jun 30 at 18:12

1 Answer 1

Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 240:11 addresses how to correct a parent when they have made a mistake:

ראה אביו שעבר על דברי תורה, לא יאמר לו: "עברת על דברי תורה". אלא יאמר לו: "אבא, כתוב בתורה כך וכך", כאילו הוא שואל ממנו ולא כמזהירו, והוא יבין מעצמו ולא יתבייש.

If you see your father violating the Torah, do not say "you have violated the Torah." Rather, as if asking, say "Doesn't it say such and such in the Torah?" and he will on his own realize and not be embarrassed.

Your responsibility in correcting a parent is to do it in such a way that they are not embarrassed, even would it be in private.

This is assuming he has actually done something wrong. Violating feminist principles may or may not violate Torah principles, depending on the case.

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