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I have seen havdalah ceremonies where a unmarried person is charged with holding the havdalah candle and is told to hold it at the height that s/he would want their spouse to be. What is the source for this idea, if any?

I have also seen this customed mentioned as a segulah

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Its a joke,non halachik –  sam Jun 29 at 4:44
    
@sam source for the idea that it's a joke: shut.moreshet.co.il/… –  Matt Jun 30 at 4:57
    
I don't know the source. But my grandma's reasoning made sense. She explained that the idea is that your spouse brings "fire" and "light" to the marriage. So, it's not about the physical height of the spouse, literally. It's about the "height" of the "flame" in your marriage. In any case, I wouldn't call this a "joke" based on this reason. –  DanF Jul 1 at 14:55

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