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There is a bracha (blessing) made after the first time a Chosson and Kallah have relations in the case that she was a basuleh (when there was a complete bia.) The makor for this Bracha is the Rosh (Kasubos Perek 1 Siman 15 -- makor in the Gaonim) and is brought by many other rishonim as well (some don't bring it.) However it's brought in Shulchan Arun Evan HaEzer Siman 63 Sif 1. However l'maseh it is my impression that those that say the bracha do so without Shem U'Malkus. If someone didn't recite this bracha by the first bia (or right afterwards) may it be said even after? The question is perhaps not so strong since there is no Shem U'Malchus. However in general is there a reason or an inyun to say it even after the first time if it wasn't said to begin with (not necessarily by the second time the couple has relations, perhaps even at a general time when the person remembers that they didn't say the bracha.)

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Who's 'we'? Is that a particular group? All Jews? Certain Achronim? Chassidim? Sefardim? And don't forget Teimanim :) –  Double AA Nov 8 '12 at 16:23
    
@DoubleAA - "We" those that are nohag to say. I actually didn't say it because that's what I learned (I'm ashakanazi and chassidish.) ... I corrected it even though I don't see anything wrong with using the word we b'frat that I was referring to the collective group of Klal Yisrael that said/says it (which in fact I didn't!) –  Yehoshua Nov 8 '12 at 16:30
    
But are you sure that no communities say it with Shem uMalchus? It is written as a straight up obligation by the Shulchan Aruch and Rama. What makes you so confident about everyone's practice? (Just FTR my impression is the same as your impression, but if all you're going on is your impression you should say so in the question and not just make absolute statements.) –  Double AA Nov 8 '12 at 16:33
    
@DoubleAA -- The Rosh which is one of the main makoros doesn't bring Shem U'Malchus. The Tur brings it is the pesicha but not in chasima. The Maharshal says to not say the bracha at all. The Bach says to say it however without Shem U'Mlachus. V'cach shma'ati u'kabalti that that is the minhag in lets say rov if not all kehillas. If you can find me one that says it with Shem U'Malchus then adaraba! –  Yehoshua Nov 8 '12 at 16:39
    
I'm aware of the Machloket between the Shulchan Aruch and the Maharshal. The Behag (the actual original source) has shem umalchus; the Tur has shem umalchus; the Shulchan Aruch has shem umalchus and the Rama does not argue. Your proof from the Rosh is easily refuted by looking at the first tosfot on Brachot 54a. I'm not disagreeing with your assertion of the common practice, only that you should state as much in the question. I will edit it in now. –  Double AA Nov 8 '12 at 16:45
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up vote 4 down vote accepted

See the Chelkat Mechokek to the Shulchan Aruch there who rules that the only reason it isn't recited Over Laasiyatan (before the action, as is generally required with mitzva brachot) is because there is no way to know before hand if the woman is actually a Betulah.

There is a general argument if the requirement of Over Laasiyatan in general is absolute, or if the blessing can still be said after the mitzva post facto. The Rama (YD 19:1) rules like the Or Zarua that post facto the blessing can still be said after the mitzva, but he qualifies that it must still be סמוך = adjacent to the mitzva. Accordingly, it would seem that the allowed time for your bracha is only 'adjacent' to the original time (I don't have an exact number of minutes on that).

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Very nice answer. I will wait to see if there any poskim that speak about this case in particular until accepting an answer. –  Yehoshua Nov 8 '12 at 16:40
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